Chapter 15

The prophetess of the Deep Sea

It was really a question he feared. The last prophecy had brought the end to his people. A superior enemy also had threatened them, an apparently superior enemy. Hadn't the BrunnenG been so isolated, so pathetic and old, they surely had been able to defeat His Shadow. The Arcannea now were different. They were a very well fortified nation, but threatened by a real superior enemy. But he could see some parallels between both historical events. Again insect-technology was involved, again he had to go to a prophet to learn about his, their or whoever’s fate. What might she tell him this time' Again the destruction of a people' She was not the Time Prophet, but the strange sensation of fate playing another important role couldn't be shaken off. His body tensed automatically when he remembered all those things that resulted from the first prophecy: The arrival of His Shadow, the destruction of Brunnis2, the death of his people and fighting friends, his own death when he tried to fulfill the prophecy – and his failure. Kai's lips pressed together slightly when his thoughts went back to his unsuccessful attack. The bitter taste of failure was still present. He pushed it back. No, whatever happened, this time he won't admit any failure, any imminent destruction. Whatever he could do, he would do. Maybe it was a second chance for him, a second chance to do something he couldn't do before – to end something in success. Or maybe fate came up with another thing to torture him. Sometimes Kai felt endless tired, tired of this fight with his past, tired of taking this new life under control. Then all motivation nearly left him. It was if he was dead again. He remembered his only motivation, or wish, when he had been dead: The dead wanted to be dead. He wanted a real, proper and final death. So he could meet up with his people in the DreamZone. The place where he was not permitted to go after His Shadow had killed him, because he never had died completely. His soul had been captured in some sort of limbo – obviously the planet Water. His body had been altered into some sort of a chemical-biological machine and of course, His Shadow had stolen everything he once had been, his personality, his memories, and he was sure that a part of his soul also went with it. After he regained the memories from exactly this former Divine Shadow, he felt this part for a brief moment, before it fled and joined the rest of his soul. There was no place for a soul in a dead and yet, not really dead body…This now was clear to him…since he got his life back and his soul returned to his living body, he understood that. But this experience wasn't very pleasant, another thing that made this new life a real misery sometimes. No wonder when he often felt no motivation to go on. The thought about the fact that he now really could die, that this time his soul was free to join his people in the DreamZone, attracted him very much. But something still held him back. First, committing suicide wasn't an honorable death, and second…there was Xev.
But despite all, the strong wish to die was always present and he knew that he longed for the day he could die, however he tried to feign himself. He never told Xev about this thoughts, he knew it would upset her, would worry her…and he didn't want to worry her. Kai sighed inwardly, nothing was eternal, and everything dies sometimes, so why worry' Someday it would happen…he only had to be patient, even if his patience was somewhat used up after 6000 years.

With a small undersea speedboat they left Dreema. Shereen navigated the ship without any visible guidance system. She seemed to know exactly where to go. After several minutes she stopped and let the boat sank slowly down to the ground again. Xev couldn't see a thing in this darkness and she asked herself how Shereen managed to navigate the ship. Then Shereen switched the lights on and the spotlights hit some ruins on the sea bottom. Xev blurt out a surprised sound. “What's that'” she asked. “It once was a city built by our ancestors.” Shereen answered and navigated between several high buildings. “These architecture is completely different to your current one. I assume that this city wasn't built for a life under water'” Kai asserted, when he observed the passing buildings. A lot of undefined waste lay around everywhere. “You're right. We hadn't always lived under water. Once, millennia’s ago, our ancestors had lived on the surface of the planet – that was before the water level had risen and buried all land, it also was long before the insect war took place. Now their cities lay on the bottom of the sea.” Shereen explained. “I first thought that it always had been like this…!” Xev wondered. Shereen shook her head: “No, otherwise I think we wouldn't have legs and arms like you…evolution, you know, we assimilated to a life under water over time, but our arms and legs always remind us that we didn't originate from a world under water.” Shereen stopped the shuttle on the roof of a nearly undamaged building and secured it to the surface. “Here we are, that's the building she's living in, but it's not that easy to get inside. We have to swim. Like I said, I'm assimilated to a life under water, but you aren’t. So we have to wait until your bodies were accommodated to the pressure down here. I'll give you a drug that sped up the process and slow down your metabolism.” Shereen gave each of them a small pill and both took it. Then she hit a few buttons and Xev felt a sudden change. “Be patient, it will take a while.” “This is the place where the prophetess lives'” Kai asked. “Yes, we didn't know why she chose this place, but I think so far no one ever had posed this question at her.” Shereen replied. Kai nodded and looked out the window to watch the ruins in the pale light of the ships spotlight in silence. Xev leaned back in her seat and relaxed a bit. She felt the difference between every pressure rising and tried to stay calm. To be trapped in a small shuttle was difficult for her, because it always reminded her to the box she grew up in. The rising pressure fortified this feeling additionally. Finally, after half an hour, Shereen gave them two small devices. They were black and felt somehow organic. Xev turned them around in her hand. “What's that'” she wanted to know. Shereen smiled and demonstrated the use of them. “Just put them into your mouth. Be sure only to breath through your mouth when we're outside. This device will assure your oxygen-supply.” “Oh,” said Xev. Then Shereen gave them some clothes and some glasses. “Here, change your clothes. It's very cold in the water, you'll need them, the glasses are for the sight, otherwise you would have trouble to see something outside,” “There's really no other way to get in'” Xev asked. Shereen shook her head. “No. There never was the need for another way to get to her, because we Sha'ran all can live under water, and so far no one else except the Sha'ran visited her before. I think you're the first non-Sha'ran to visit her.” Shereen slipped out her dress she had worn the evening and put her suit on without caring about her nudity. Xev shrugged her shoulders and did the same, as well as Kai. “I'll wait for you outside.” She opened an airlock on the bottom of the shuttle. “The barrier, which holds the water back, isn't harmful for us, so just jump through it.” Shereen made a step forward and jumped through the hole into the darkness. At once she assimilated to the environment she was born in. Her organism slowed down, slowly she swallowed the water and her lungs stopped working in the normal way. Her different biology allowed her to extract the oxygen contained in water and so to “breath” under water. Another thing that changed immediately, were her eyes. The former silver glinting eyes changed their color into deep black and she was able to spot her environment as clearly as on the planets surface. The silvery color was only a protection for the flashy sunlight.
Some seconds later, they saw the spotlight from the ship and saw Shereen waiting in front of the ship, Xev and Kai followed her. Xev needed a few minutes to get used to everything, the breathing and the cold water, of course, the swim-suit was really good and she felt her whole body warming up soon, but the darkness around her was very intense, and this scared her a little. She was happy for the steady ground under her feet, and the light in front of the ship. It would guide their way for a few meters. Shereen had a small torch in her hand that additionally lit a small area around them up. Wherever the light beam hit the water, the creatures of the sea fled. Shereen pointed forward and gestured them to follow her. As curious as Xev always was, this time she stayed close to Kai, she really didn't want to know what else besides them was in that depth. She felt Kais hand on her arm and his inquiring gaze, which asked her if everything was all right. She nodded and touched his hand gently. Then they parted and followed Shereen by swimming along the roof of the building. On the edge, Shereen waited and pointed downwards, it was pitch black there and Xev knew why Shereen had the torch brought with, then they started to swim downwards. Xev looked interested around wherever the light of the torch hit the building. The building was very high, must have been very beautiful once, because she spotted some architectural remains on the outside. Unlike the other buildings around, which all looked like skeletons, because of the missing windows, this one was in a really good condition. It hadn't very much windows for its size, but wherever she could see some, she didn't spot a broken one.
When they nearly touched the ground, Shereen stopped in front of an opening. It once must have been a door, now it was only an open gap, possibly the door once was made out of material that hadn't last the millennia’s. They entered a huge hall, which was, besides all the water, completely undamaged. The floor and walls were made of marble, the ceiling was decorated with very colorful paintings. The furniture, which once may have been here was long gone, but a huge chandelier still hung from the ceiling. Shereen pointed to the ceiling and another opening. Down here, Xev could see many damaged walls and maybe entries to other rooms of this old building, but the one above seemed to be the one of interest. Shereen swam ahead and slipped through the gap. Above, a surprise awaited them. When Xev had swum through it, she suddenly stood in another room, and the water only was knee-high. Shereen wrung her hair and smiled at them. “Welcome inside…” Kai was as well as surprised as Xev. Shereen switched her torch off, because there was enough light coming from some chandeliers at the ceiling to see the room. The room wasn't as big as the one under them, but it was also decorated with colorful paintings and precious materials, stone, wood and metal. Different to the room they entered first, she saw that several various furniture were still in its place, as if they were left not long ago. “You can breath normal here, there is enough oxygen…” Shereen said, her eyes going back to normal again. “How is that possible'” asked Kai and put the device out of his mouth. Shereen shrugged her shoulders. “We assume that somewhere here must be a generator, as you see we have light too, if you listen carefully you can hear a low humming. But we never found one. Some of our archaeologists guess that it must be located underground. But for us it isn't that important. It works, we have oxygen and light, that's all we need for any visit here. Maybe it is the prophetess herself that assures these support.” Shereen pointed to an intact door in front of them and looked at Kai. “Now, last of the BrunnenG – that's the way you have to go!” Kai nodded, and after a last look at Xev he followed Shereens outstretched arm. Xev immediately wanted to follow him, but Shereen held her back. “No, Xev, we have to wait here, she had called him, no one else!” Xev sighed and stayed behind. “Don't worry, the prophetess is only a prophetess, nothing will happen to him…!” Shereen calmed her when she saw her anxious gaze. “It's more the fear about what he might learn there.” Xev replied with furrowed brows. “It's normal to be afraid about such things, I have been afraid too when I visited her. Well, she isn't called the prophetess of fate for nothing. I believe that she had a lot of influence to one's life, but I think that's why she is here for.” “Sometimes I ask myself if it shouldn't be our own decisions that determine our future…too many times fate was predetermined in Kai's life, and he never had the chance to change that…” “Are you sure'” Shereen asked. Xev climbed up a few steps to get out of the water and sat down on a couch, looking back at her. “The TimeProphet had told him that his people would die, that he would be the last of them to die, and that he will be the one who will destroy the Divine Order and His Shadow. That's very clearly foretold in my opinion.” “Maybe, yes, but the TimeProphet looked into the circles of time, she only told him what had happened and would happen over and over again, if time really flows in a circle, and I'm yet not sure if the circle can't be broken, then there is really no chance to change it. At least, she hadn't told him that he would become alive again some day…” Shereen sat down next to her. “I'm sure he didn't expect that he had to exist 2000 years as an assassin of the Divine Order before he could fulfill the prophecy…that's what I don't like on prophets, they never tell you the whole thing!” Xev said. Shereen smiled: “I know. I'm sometimes your opinion, I don't know if it is good to know too much of things that might happen someday. It's the same that happened to me, when I visited her, I was told that in difficult and dangerous times I would be the leader of the Arcannea. That in this uncertain time it's important to have a good and steady leader…well, I was a bit surprised, but that's what was said. This was 55 years ago, since 40 years I'm president of the Arcannean Alliance and I expected to happen those “difficult” times soon, but for 20 years nothing happened…and of course I told them what would happen someday from the beginning…but you know how people are.” Shereen sighed before she continued. “No one really believed that the mighty Arcannean Alliance one time could be in trouble. It's a heavy burden you have to carry when you know exactly that this will happen and no one believes you. And when Kai told me his story I was reminded to those years. We did nearly the same fault, and for that I'm happy that we still were alive, despite all those circumstances.” Xev shook her head: “Sounded really similar.” “Yes, never put an oracle into question. She told me some more things I'm constantly thinking about, because I hope to see some clues to get out of our miserable situation. The prophetess of fate never tells you what exactly would happen, she always circumscribe things and also she only gave indices about what you could do…you always have the choice to do the right or the wrong thing. That's were fate really comes into play. She didn't foretell your life…life is what you made out of it…by listening to her advises…or not. You only have to listen carefully at them during your whole life because you won't understand everything she tells you from the beginning…or you simply forget…only to remember in time. So she had told me an oracle I couldn't remember until we met. There is a connection between everything that happened the past days, a connection between your arrival and our situation – otherwise I think our Alliance would have been broken up years ago.” Shereen said. Xev asked her curiously: “And what do you think is the link between us'” “Maybe I know now what she meant with the oracle she told me: If your hope is almost gone – the last of the lost ones will return and new hope will be born.” Shereen said and looked at the now closed door. “The BrunnenG always had been the lost ones in our history, and Kai is the last of them. If that's what she meant, I'm full of hope that we can manage this war.” Xev looked up in surprise: “She really told you that'” Shereen nodded. “Well, that's strange indeed. Now he has to visit her… and believe me… I'm very curious where this thing will go!” But Xev was still uneasy about it… even if Shereen told her that with these prophesies someone had at least some choice…what if they choose the wrong one' What if Kai has to make a choice that would end up with … she couldn't end that thought. TimeProphet or prophetess of fate, she really saw no difference in it. The only wonderful fateful thing that happened to them was Kai's return into a living state. But even this had its price. Couldn't be fate show any mercy to him' she asked in silence. She had seen the pain in his eyes when he had looked at her before he turned to enter the next room. And this hurt her too. “Let us calm down, Xev, it makes no sense to think about what she might tell or not. Let's just wait!” Shereen said and touched her shoulder gently. Xev nodded and smiled a bit. “You're right…”

Before Kai entered the room, a new wave of deja vu overwhelmed him. The last fateful visit to the TimeProphet was still strong present in his mind. Then he slowly opened the door and entered a room, which was bathed in a soft blue color. The door behind him closed automatically and he saw someone sitting on the edge of a fountain in the middle of the room.

“Hello Kai! Welcome. Tell me, how is my sister'” she greeted him in a melodious soft voice. Kai stopped irritated: “Sister'” he asked. “You thought about her before you entered…” the prophetess said and Kai was sure that she smiled. He closed his eyes, why didn't he really guess that' “TheTimeProphet!” he sighed. “Yes, of course, I haven't heard anything from her since a very long time…!” The voice now was much closer and he opened his eyes again. He found himself next to the prophetess and the fountain. The woman appeared to be far younger than the TimeProphet. She was dressed in a shining yellow dress and had long black hair. Her eyes shimmered like jewels. He knew exactly that he hadn't moved a bit, so it must have been her who had dragged him somehow next to her. He didn't like to be put somewhere against his will, he didn't like to be moved around like any object. So his question wasn't all too friendly, but he tried to act politely. “Why do you want to talk to me' I've heard that no non-Sha'ran had ever visited you'” If she detected his undertone, she dissembled. She played with the water inside the basin and gazed at him with her jewel eyes. “I'm living very isolated here, different to my sister, maybe that's the cause why no one apart from the Sha'ran visits me. Every one could hear my call – if they would listen, but unfortunately not very many do. But you have listened. I knew you would, because it's what fate wants – even if you might resist against fate.” Her chant got softer. She knew very well how he thought about fate and predetermination. And Kai said aloud: “Fate always wasn't meaning well with me…fate destroyed everything I once knew, my people, my world, my love…my life. There isn't much I want to have to do with any new predeterminations,” he said harshly and bitterly. “I know. You haven't had been the lucky one with fate. But tell me, isn't there anything good that fate may have caused for you' Tell me, isn't there anything in your new life that is positive'” Kai kept silence. “Xev is her name, am I right'” The prophetess stopped playing with the water and suddenly the environment changed again. Now she sat on some blue colored pillows, as well as Kai in front of her, the color of the room changed into a soft orange. “It's not mine to define your fate. I only tell you what I've learned about your fate. What you'll do with the knowledge I transfer to you – that's your true fate, Kai. After you visited my sister and she told you what would happen, you made your decision, like in every circle of time. But I can't tell you what will happen in your future. I'm not a TimeProphet, I do not have the gift to see into the circles of time. I'm a prophetess of fate. I only tell people what important things wait for them in their life, what they do with this knowledge…that's their business. I have no influence on events in the future and in the past.” Kai looked at her skeptically: “Could I've made another decision at that time'” “Yes and no. Yes, because you simply could have stayed on Brunnis and wait for death like all the others. And no, because the things were foretold, it was you who have to destroy His Shadow and the Divine Order. “ “So rather not,“ Kai said. “And where is the difference between you and your sister'” “As I told you, I can't tell you what really and certainly will happen, I'm only gifted to see important parts of one persons fate. I try to keep some order in the balance of justice and injustice in a person’s life. But in the end, it's always you who writes his own fate. I have no influence to change any person’s fate. But many people didn't think about what I tell them. They don't think about the consequences their actions may cause. Too many of them take the line of the least resistance...and this could have consequences which often turned out to something they didn't want or expect.” She looked a bit sad at Kai. “It's always important to think about prophecies, or something similar. As you did when my sister told you what would happen. Of course, to make this decision was easy. She gave you the hint that you will be the one who destroys His Shadow…even if she hadn't told you when. But it made it easy for you to make this decision. And I think, even if she hadn't told you, you would have made it.” Kai nodded slowly, his thought went unintentionally back to the prophecy of the TimeProphet. If he hadn't fought against His Shadow, if he hadn't left Brunnis, if he had died on Brunnis...His Shadows power had swallowed maybe more than only the LightZone. The DarkZone maybe would have been under his control also. The lives that would have been extinguished would have been certainly more than the destruction of the LightUniverse had ever caused. He had made a sacrifice he was unaware of at this time, but now he knew about it. It all became clearer to him now. Fate saved many lives, but also there was a price to be paid...so he had to kill hundred thousands of people. He felt the prophetess' fingers on his arm. They left small water drops when she withdrew again after a moment. “ I know your fate, Kai, your past, your present and a part of your future fate. I see the connection between all those events, they all lead to the events happening soon. And I also know about the fight, which will never leave you alone...I even know some things about you, you didn't know. And at first I had doubts if you're ready for the things I have to tell you...but…” Kai sighed and interrupted her: “No one ever had asked me if I was ready for something. No one asked me if I was ready to act against my own people like this, no one asked me if I was ready to fight against His Shadow...no one asked me if I was ready to die and to be “reborn” as a soulless machine and to kill people for 2000 years, and to wander the universe as an undead for much longer. No one asked me if it's okay for me to regain my life...burdened with all the guilt of 2000 years of remorseless killing...” Kai stopped for a brief moment, “Sometimes I ask myself if someone is interested in what I think, what I want, even now, that I'm alive again, it seems that fate denies me any free will to do what I really want to do...” The prophetess tilted her head: “I doubt that it's in your and Xev's interest what you really want.” “Maybe in mine...!” Kai answered coldly and very directly. He was upset. “You never have been an egoist, Kai, you've always put the welfare of other people above your own...” “My people could tell you a different story if they were still alive...when I broke their defensive shield,” “But we know both that they were beyond any reasonable thinking, that it wouldn't have made any difference. Their fate was sealed.” A moment of silence arose. Kai calmed down a bit, he was surprised that after all he had gone through the last weeks so much bitterness was still inside him. Of course, the prophetess was right, he wasn't a selfish person. And he wouldn't have left his friends alone with the current situation. “I'm sure that there must be any reason why I am here now, why we three are here. Maybe there is a reason why I am alive again, too. I think that's why I am here for'” He said to the prophetess. The woman smiled. This was a far better start to talk, she thought and answered: “There's always a reason for something, Kai. Of course, fate has brought you here. Decades ago I prophesied Shereen that someone would come to help her, to help her people, to gave them new hope in this nearly hopeless situation they were in.” Kai furrowed his brows inquiring. “Yes, that’ll be you. I clearly saw that some things would change with your arrival. The Arcannea will have a new chance to fight against this uprising Empire of Pr'karesh, and therefore they maybe can prevent another cruel tyranny over humanity. But it's only the chance to do so...not the certainty that it will be like this.” Kai asked: “So we have to make the right choice...” The prophetess nodded. “Everything in this chain of events depends on very few decisions...the right decisions.” “But there is a definite decision I have to make, that's the reason why only I have to come here, right'” Kai said with narrowed eyes. Again the prophetess nodded. “It's a certain situation you will be in, when you have to make this decision.” Her expression turned sad. “I don't think that it’ll be a pleasant situation...!” Kai said dryly. “And of course, you can't tell me anything more about this situation...!” The prophetess said contritely: “No, I can't, because that means to interfere with the time circle. As much as I sometimes want to tell people…but you know…every time they want to avoid those foreseen events…to save themselves, their friends or else, fate hit them only harder and finally the situation ended up in a mess. For that it's not allowed to tell too much. It's not the humans business to manipulate events in this way. So I can only give you the hint that you remember to make a decision when the time is close. I beg you, Kai, there is so much depending on the right decision.” Kai sighed again. Fate and decisions, unpleasant situations...he was so fed up with it. Again he felt her fingers stroking over his skin. “Kai, when you'll meet your worst enemy, who could also be your best friend...the time is near to make that decision. If you choose the right one, this universe and the people in it will have a new chance to live on without tyranny and in peace, or this universe will someday end like the LightUniverse had ended. I know this is a heavy burden for you to carry, but somehow I know that you'll do the right thing. Not only for the people here, for your friends, but also for yourself. And I am almost sure that in the end you will find the peace you long for. Always remember that there is really a greater cause.” She put her forefinger between his brows and concentrated. “This is something I never have done before,...and it's more I am allowed to do, but in this case this decision is justifiable, because the balance of fate in your case is very one sided ...” Kai winced when the fierce mental power of the prophetess hit him and pictures streamed inside his mind. They were chaotic and disordered, but somehow he knew that they would clear up when he needed them. “You've seen more than any other human being I know, Kai,” she said softly after she broke the contact. “You've gone through more pain than any other human being I know...so this maybe is the cause why I believe in you to be the right person to make this decision...you'll understand. And now go back to your friends. Everything will be revealed in time, don't worry. I have to rest now.” She put out her hand and Kai touched it. Suddenly he appeared next to the entrance and the room was colored again in this soft blue shimmer, but besides that, this time the room was empty. Kai turned slowly and left the room, returned to Shereen and Xev.

Of course, both women waited nervously for him, because the meeting took over three hours already. Something very unusual, how Shereen said. Xev was at his side at once, when he finally walked through the door. “Kai! I'm glad you're back!” she said and looked curiously at him. Kai stopped and stroked gently over her hair: “Give me some time, Xev. I have to think about everything I've learned,” he said in a low voice. Shereen didn't ask any question. She knew very well how confusing a meeting with the prophetess could be. She remembered that she needed a lot of days to clear up her mind again. “I suggest we return to the shuttle. The effect of the pills I gave you will only last for one hour at best. I really didn't expect that it would take so long…” “What will happen to us if the effect looses'” Xev asked. Shereen smiled bittersweet: “I think you really didn't want to know that…!” Kai raised his brows but said nothing. “Let's go-ho..!” Xev pushed and put the glasses back over her eyes and the breathing apparatus back into her mouth. Shereen wade back to the hole and jumped forward down again. Xev and a very reflective Kai followed.

Their way back proceeded in near silence. Kai didn't speak any word during their assimilation back to normal pressure and the whole journey to Dreema. Back in Shereens domicile, when they changed their clothes again, Xev asked him: “What can we do now' I mean, how can we be helpful'” Kai looked at her: “I don't know. Maybe we should wait what Stan's and Shore's opinion is, if it is possible to transfer the technology of the Lexx to their ships in time. I fear, that in the near future the Pr'karesh will attack again, and then it's useful to know that the new strategy works.” “Will they attack again'” she asked. “Of course they will. They think they're superior and that someday the Alliance will break up. They will double their efforts to bring the Arcannean down. Besides that…” Kai stopped a moment when some fuzzy pictures rushed through his mind. He saw explosions and people dying. In some familiar place, but he couldn't detect where. “What'” asked Xev. “I'm almost sure that we have to expect attacks from them soon. I can't tell when, where or how, everything I know is that it will happen. The prophetess transferred some pictures into my mind, and when I'm concentrating I'm able to take a closer look at them, but can't see them still very clearly. I assume that it is too early.” “Shereen told me that everything the prophetess tells comes back into your mind when you need it… and of course, if you listen to it.” Kai nodded. “That's true. We have to find out what we can do to prevent any possible new threat to the Arcannea. Maybe the information I got from the prophetess will help us, if I'm able to encrypt it.” Xev smiled and leaned forward to close the zipper on the backside of his jacket. “You will, I think there is a reason why you were chosen for that.” Kai looked a bit grimly when she said that. “I don't like to be chosen for anything anymore…every time it ended up with death and destruction, especially for those I love!” He turned away from her and tried to suppress the bitterness that showed up again. Xev caught his hand and stopped the movement by pulling him firmly to her body. She held him merciless fierce in her arms and whispered: “Is it that what you're afraid of' That I could maybe die' That Stan could die' That the Arcannea could be extinguished like your own people once had been extinguished'” Kai couldn't free himself of her embrace and gave up. Almost desperate he said: “Yes, I am. What would you do in my position Xev' With all the things that happened in my past it's not really a surprise, isn't it'” Xev shook her head slowly: “You needn't be concerned about me…” Kai interrupted her: “I'm asking myself what I should do if the pictures show me anyhow something I can't deal with, something I maybe can't change…such as something happening to you. Too many people have lost their lives because of me…I can't deal with that any longer, Xev. So you maybe can understand that I am afraid of loosing someone I love again. I always have and I always will.” In complete surprise Xev loosened her grip and Kai stormed off the room. “Kai, what do you mean by you always have been afraid of loosing me'” Xev yelled after him. This sudden confession surprised her more than everything else he had said since he was alive again. Had he really been afraid of loosing her all the time' Even when he was dead and without any emotion' Well, he always had told them that he had none…. she now wasn't so sure that this had been the complete truth. Maybe he hadn't felt the emotion, but she was sure that he in some strange way cared for her, for Stan, so why couldn't there be some sort of fear to fail in protecting them' But hadn't he said that he had been afraid of loosing her' This of course gave the whole thing a different meaning. There was a clear difference between the fear of failing in protecting someone or the fear to loose someone close. Xev followed him through the door back into the living room, where they had eaten some hours ago. Shereen was nowhere to be seen. Kai stood somewhere in the room and watched the rich sea life outside. “Kai'” she asked carefully. He didn't react. Xev closed the distance between them and asked again. “Kai….what do you mean by I have always been afraid of loosing you?” Kai's gaze dropped to the floor when he answered: “I…I'm not sure, I often think of the time when I was dead, that's not very easy, because it is like to remember some of the memories of those killed by His Shadow. And one of those things I remember very clearly is that there was more than a simple affinity towards you, Xev. It was a special kind of affinity, now I know that, because I can feel it.” Xev lifted her hand and stroke gently over his cheek. “You said you was afraid of loosing me. That's a sensation Kai.” The BrunnenG raised his head and looked into her beautiful eyes. “I know. But I don't have any better word to subscribe what was sometimes going on inside me when you put yourself in such silly situations. I couldn't feel fear, Xev, but I remembered this sensation. And like with all strong sensations I ever experienced in my first life…I was able to think of them whenever there was a situation a living human being might felt them.” He took her face between his hands and pulled her slowly closer. Xev closed her eyes and enjoyed his closeness very much. “Even love?” she asked whispering against his lips. Kai answered: “Sometimes, yes.” Xev melted completely, this was something she really hadn't expected. With an almost trembling voice, she said, deeply moved: “I love you Kai, and I'm happy for our affinity!” They couldn't resist any longer and shared a long passionate kiss. They parted when they heard Shereen cough behind them. “Excuse me, I don't want to disturb you, but I have to return to the council hall…!” She said with furrowed brows. “We have some problems with our evacuation procedure. And some Pr'karesh ships seem to attack the transports we have organized to bring our colonists back to the core planets of our Alliance.” “That's not good…” Xev said worried. Shereen nodded. “You see, the sooner we get protection against their fire power the better. It would save many lives.” “Then I suggest we return to the Lexx to help Stan and Dr. Shore' with the work. I possess some technical knowledge and may be of some use there.” Kai said. “That would be fine. Te'ran will return in a few minutes and take you back to the Lexx. And of course, you can use the guest quarters on Arcan's as long as you want. I'm sorry that I have to leave you alone…” Shereen retreated and left the room. “They're in real trouble, aren’t they'” Xev asked sighing. Kai nodded. “Yes.” “Did the prophetess say something about this conflict'” Xev asked suddenly. Kai looked out the window again. “Yes. But I have to think about everything, Xev. I can't tell you anything right now. Be a little patient. There were more hints and advices than clear suggestions how to solve their problem.” “Ok, I'll try to be patient,” she said. “Kai, Xev'” They suddenly heard Te'rans voice. “Here you are. My wife told me to take you back to the Lexx…is that correct'” “It is…” Kai said. “Ok, then let's go…I think I should change my job…doing shuttle service all the day now,” Te'ran grinned and started to walk back to the airlock, where he had parked the shuttle. “I'm very curious to see the Lexx a little bit closer, tell me, is it possible to visit it'” Xev smiled: “Why not' I'd like to show you around a bit, if Stan don't mind, of course, he's the captain.” Te'ran radiated back: “That would be wonderful. I've read a lot about the old insect ships, but of course, never seen such one…!” “The Lexx is different to those ships, “ Kai interjected, “It also consists of mechanical parts, and it is intelligent… kind of. Our moths are more comparable to the ancient insect crafts our ancestors flew.” Te'ran opened the door to the shuttle and let them enter. “Well, time moved on since those days…and I always wondered why we never developed ships with artificial intelligence, at least our ships are some sort of alive too, they're biomechanical/biochemical ships, you saw the material we use for various of objects' They had a lot of useful characteristics…self-healing, the material can adapt to its environment immediately and so on…our engines depend on biotechnology too, but we never thought of systems with a mind of its own.” Te'ran explained them. Xev touched the surface of the shuttle and nodded. She found the material interesting from the beginning. She took a seat next to Kai and asked: “I've seen very few of this material in daily use on Arcan's, even here on Sha'ra I saw it not often, is there a reason for it'” “Not really. But the use in space is much easier. We grow the material there and don't have to transport it into space first, that's an advantage. And the conditions in space are much better, no germs, no environmental effects. On the planets we still use raw materials of different kind. That depends of course which ones are available. But there's no main reason. It's just that simple.” Te'ran started the engines and maneuvered the small ship back into the endless ocean and from there back into the Sha'ran sky.

It took them only half an hour to meet with the Lexx, which was orbiting the station far closer now, so that the support of material and technicians of Shore's team could take place without much time delay. When they land on the bridge with the shuttle, they spotted a slight chaos. “Wow, what's happening here'” asked Xev and looked around surprised. Some technicians had brought some equipment and now a lot of it was spread all over the bridge. Stan discovered them and waved: “Hey, welcome back, didn’t expect you so soon.” “Very busy…'!” She said dryly. Stan grinned: “Yes, Lexx isn't used to that, I had to calm him down a bit.” “I quite believe it. I'll show Te'ran around a bit if you don't mind. Kai mentioned that he wanted to help you with some technical parts, if you need his assistance…!” “Oh, just show him around, that's okay. But where is Kai'” Stan looked over Xev's shoulder. Xev turned around and knitted her brows in surprise. “Oh…he just had been here…!” “Are you looking for Kai'” Te'ran asked and came closer, he looked around curiously. “Yes...” “He went off into that direction,” Te'ran pointed at the left entrance of the bridge. Stan looked inquiring at Xev. “I think he wants to be alone for a while, we visited someone on Sha'ra, she's called the prophetess of the Deep Sea. I believe her to be something similar like the TimeProphet. Kai had dreamt about her and we learned from Shereen that this woman really exists. So we went down to her. We stayed there for nearly three hours, and I think he had learned some very important things…!” Xev explained him shortly. “Eh, what things'” Stan asked. “I don't know, he doesn't know. Time will reveal it, he said. The only thing I know is that it must have to do something with the conflict and, well, I think with his person…maybe another prophecy.” Xev sighed. “Oh boy, not another one,” Stan looked a bit worried. “I can understand why he wants to be alone, two prophesies in a single lifetime – that's too much.” “I'll look for him later and tell him to help you, okay'” she suggested. “Alright, so far I have to do some things…fortunately 790 is very cooperative this time,” Stan said smiling. “How comes that'” Xev asked surprised. “Oh, I just threatened him with reprogramming…this time I swore that he would be activated by me!” Xev started to giggle: “That's good, captain, very groundbreaking, really. Fortunately he didn't agree.” “That's right,” Stan said with a fading smile when he thought about 790 drooling over him. Xev patted his shoulder and left the bridge with Te'ran.



Chapter 16

Bad feelings and apprehensions

Kai had used the opportunity to vanish somewhere deep inside the Lexx's many corridors and rooms. He needed some time to think. He entered a small chamber he had visited several times before, when he just got his life back and needed also many time to be alone. Kai sat down on one of the stool-shaped fleshy forms and leaned back to the wall. He had a headache. The pictures the prophetess had transferred to him showed up again and again, more often now. The first unintentional flood of pictures had hit him on Sha'ra, short after the visit, and now, since they arrived on the Lexx there was suddenly a constant flow of them, as if they want to show him something. But he couldn't recognize anything, because everything was like a movie in its fast-forward mode and a Kaboo-intoxication at the same time. It was very uncomfortable and he knew that he had to slow them down. He put his hand on his forehead and tried to concentrate, ignored the headache.
First there was only this chaotic mess of prophetical pictures, but then he spotted some clear fragments.
Again those explosions, ships in a space battle, the Lexx firing at something, then everything really slowed down…he saw the Arcannea station and suddenly he zoomed into the station, raced along the corridors until he reached a certain place. Kai noticed that it was a hangar, similar to the one they had landed on before. Strange sensations hit him there, fear, desperation, death…then he saw the shadow of a man drawing closer to someone near the wall, it was Xev, huddled there, her eyes filled with pain and slight fear…she seemed to call his name and hissed at the man in front of her, then he saw something glistering in the man’s hand…. Kai wanted to scream, to call the man’s attention…but of course, there was no reaction - he wasn't there, he only saw pictures, Xev or the man threatening her would never hear him. Instead he zoomed closer again, as if he wanted to run towards her, then, suddenly, everything went dark and the next thing he saw were stars, he was back in space again and the Arcannea station lay in front of him. A wonderful picture, but the peaceful picture quickly faded - an explosion quaked the station. Kai gasped and fell nearly forward…after a moment his eyes snapped opened and he was back in reality. Disturbed he tried to understand what he had seen.
The whirling images were very confusing, but he doubted that they meant anything different than they had shown. The Arcannea station was in danger, and something would happen - when he and Xev were also there.
The pictures of Xev huddled against the wall didn't leave his mind. He felt fear creeping into his heart, would she be hurt, or in the end die' The situation was scary enough. In fact he didn't know if the situation would ever become reality. The prophetess had only offered him the pictures as guidance, he had to find out on his own if they were the real future or a possible one…he guessed that everything would depend on those few decisions – including the important one. Kai decided to keep an eye on Xev, when they really visit the station for the next time. He always had protected her and he would never admit something happen to her…even if he was alive and much more vulnerable now.
Alive and vulnerable.
He hadn't thought about any situation where this could be a disadvantage so far. There was no need for it. But maybe in the near future he had to fight against other people, and likely had to kill again.
Kai shuddered. Wasn't the decision he had declared decided too hastily' Hadn't he killed enough' Could he hurt another one when he was forced to do it' He didn't know, maybe, maybe not. He let hung his head. Could a possible inability to fight be the reason for the foreseen situation, for Xev's situation' Kai started to groan…no, this was something he didn't want to think of, whatever happened, this mustn’t happen…never!
Coldness clasped his heart when he thought about the logical and only consequence how he might be able to prevent it!
A grim, desperate smile appeared on his face…oh yes, there it was again…the thing that was with him since he had left his home to fight – death. Death dictated his existence since 6000 years now…after death had come to him, he had brought it to thousands, again and again. His innermost was set on fire again. Would it ever end' Had fate created another game to strengthen the endless hell he was living in' It was hard to believe anything different. The prophetess had arisen new hope in him that it’ll end someday…but it seemed that there was again a price to pay for that. He never had killed while being alive…it was the only thing left to him…should that be the price to pay now' Should that be the decision he had to settle' No…not the important decision the prophetess had meant. He didn't know why, but somehow he felt that there had to be a bigger thing, the importance was too minor.
Too minor, a rough laugh escaped his lips, for everyone else maybe…
Another part of him was more resolute: he couldn't let Xev die…only because he wasn't able to stop any possible threat for her life. The prophetess was right…he wasn't that selfish. What was the difference, he already had the devil inside…even if there was a tiny bit of innocence left – the fact that he never had killed when alive. But somehow Kai knew that he was ready to sacrifice the tiny little thing that was left of this innocence – for Xev, and the way he had to go after that decision. He hadn't seen any pictures laying behind those events…they hadn't revealed yet, because the end was uncertain. The only thing he could do was to listen to his inner voice – and rely on it, hopefully it would show him the right way. Maybe another possibility than to kill again, but his hope only was very vaguely.
Fate – he really began to hate this word. He found himself doing to wish he was dead again – the dead at least weren't able to feel all this uncertainty and sensations coming with this situation he was in now. It was surely far easier to rely on logical and calculated decisions than to listen to inner voices and decisions made upon vaguely sensed sensations.
Kai shook his head, no, there was hardly less confusion in his mind after he had thought about all those issues, but to wish to be dead wasn't a solution at all. He couldn't hide from his new sensations, they would forever be a part of him now…he had to cope with them – in every situation.
He stretched out his right arm and looked at it. He bent his wrist, as if to shoot with the brace that once had been there. If he still had …but no, he banned the thought of having such a weapon.
It somehow comforted him that he hadn't the brace any longer. Too much pain and death was bound to it.
Kai let his arm fall back and thought about all the other things that were necessary to defend himself or another one: physical strength, cleverness, what was left of it after he got alive again' He didn't know. He knew that Xev could beat him in an instant, the clusterlizard gave her this strength, and he now was only a normal human. He surely had more strength than Stanley, but could he cope with other men? Kai tried to remember how it had been when alive…of course there had been some training and the one or other physical quarreling with other newborn or even older members of his people, and he remembered that he hadn't been someone who evaded those incidents…fortunately he won most of those. A faint smile appeared on his face, his parents weren't amused about such things, but he never wanted to be everybody’s darling…he had have his own conceivability of wrong and right. He had never evaded arguments when it was against his agenda, or the agenda of his friends. Something the BrunnenG couldn't deal with very well. But the newborns weren't cut from the same cloth than the old BrunnenG…and somehow they tried to show that.
And the superhuman strength after he became an assassin' With the transformation back he had lost it, of course, but he also remembered that strength wasn't the only thing how to win a fight.
His brain had been altered to develop strategies and counterstrategies in only few seconds and minutes… everything he had needed to hunt his victims down. Kai asked himself hesitantly if there was anything left of it inside the depths of his mind. He never had tried to find those remains…Xev had told him that she hadn't removed the chip implant with all the stuff it was programmed with, because she couldn't risk to damage his brain irreversible. Since the connection to all those other implants he once possessed was cut, it was useless…well, almost. The information was still there, every information ever transferred to it. The chip also had his divine assassin programming, but since he got alive and for that hadn't any other mechanical parts it was useless and stayed inactive, as well as the programming for his “special” assassination training program. He couldn't access this region any longer, and he somewhat wasn't unhappy about that.
He had to trust his and all those other memories he possessed to manage possible situations involving violence. There was no other way. He shrugged his shoulders and sighed, until there was no such situation he wouldn't find out if it would work, but what had he to lose' Xev maybe, if he wasn't well prepared. I will be… he said firmly and with new determination, I won't let anything happen to her…, he wasn't sure how, but who knows, somewhere must be the solution for that. And now stop hiding here, they need you to do something useful… Kai reprehend himself. He pushed all the unpleasant thoughts back, and rose from the seat to leave the chamber, he needed some distraction - and something to do - or he would get mad by thinking about all those issues and things that could happen.

Kai returned to the bridge and asked the happily whistling Stanley for something to do. “Hey, there you are, Xev asked for you nearly an hour ago…everything alright'” The Captain of the Lexx wanted to know. Stan was about to climb into the moth to get to Lexx's main control systems or his cortical knot somewhere above the bridge, an unhappy looking 790 in his arms. “I'm alright, Stan, thanks, I just needed some time to think…!” “Oh, Xev told me, about this prophetess, right'” Kai nodded. “So, what do you think' I mean, sounds strangely for another prophecy…” Kai shrugged his shoulders slightly: “Maybe, yes, but I don't want to … talk about it now, Stan. There are other things to do.” Stan looked a bit suspicious at Kai. He was sure that the tall man had to hide something, he could see worry in his eyes, and this alerted him a bit. But he also knew that there was no way to force the BrunnenG to tell him something, more than ever if he hadn't told Xev, so he gave in and handed 790 over to Kai. “If you don't mind…can you please attach 790 directly to Lexx's main control systems to extract some data of his protection systems, better said we need some data about Lexx's outer hull composition'” Kai nodded and took 790. Stanley still smiled, even though he hadn't got the information he was eager to get, this was unusual enough, so Kai turned around before he left and asked suddenly: “Did you meet Yareena'” Immediately Stan's smile grew much bigger, he had hit the mark. “Yes, but there was only few time…but better than nothing. She's really a great person.” Kai smiled back a little and looked down in his usual manner: “I'm happy for you Stan…!” Than the BrunnenG left. He was really happy that Stanley had also found some luck in his thitherto not very lucky life. All those circumstances last time were working wonders on them. First he got alive, this caused immense happiness for Xev, then Stan fell in love on Arcan's. Yes, he was really glad that both now had something that made them happy. Maybe the prophetess was right and fate wasn't always that bad…

Kai hadn't any problems to connect 790 to Lexx's systems and the stoically quiet robot head collected the data needed. Kai enjoyed the silence and the constant humming here above, it had something ruminant, and he could concentrate on his work even better. No disturbing thoughts troubled him now. First the chirping sound of another moth let him look up. It was Xev, and she was alone. He guessed that Te'ran had to leave sooner than he wanted.
790 of course noticed her appearance at once. He switched back into the normal operation modus and greeted her cheerful. “Oh my love-muffin is back, I…!” “Not now 790, later…please,” she said and silenced him with a strict glance. “Och….!” The robot head went disappointed back to work.
“Hey,” she greeted Kai softly, “Stan told me you're here.” Kai stopped connecting some wires and smiled slightly. “Where's Te'ran'” he asked. “He had to leave, some troubles with the reinforcement of the evacuation ships, he's on the station now!” Xev explained and looked over the wires connected to 790. Kai nodded and looked thoughtfully at her. “Everything okay'” she asked. “Yes, I just…needed some time alone,” he dropped his gaze again, so Xev couldn't see the spark of worry creeping into his eyes again. “I think I made another human experience,…” he said instead. Xev raised one brow: “Really'” Kai sighed: “It can make you mad to think about things which may can happen.” Xev leaned against the wall, crossed her arms and looked at him. “What'” he asked when he noticed her gaze. “You thought about things which may can happen' What things'” Was there some reproach in her voice' Kai put his tools aside. The relaxing moment was over, he couldn't ignore the coming back of these strange sensations he had have two hours ago any longer, when he looked into her face. As if something would happen soon, a kind of apprehension. Well, he had all reason for this apprehension. The horrible vision with Xev being threatened returned nearly at full force and he had to steady himself. “Kai'” Xev asked worried. “It's nothing,” he repelled. “I can see that,” her sarcastic voice brought him back into reality. “There is something you didn't want to tell me, I can feel that, Kai.” Again she tried to get something out of him, but he stayed silent. “I cannot, because there is no certainty for it…!” Kai said. There was no certainty in life, there were always miscellaneous possibilities…and suddenly he saw the same pictures again running through his mind…but they were slightly different. He was about to curse, because this moment couldn't be most improper…but what chance does he have to fight it'
He was back in that hangar, it was dark and there was a fight. In fast flashes he saw how someone sent him to the ground and from there he saw her…
Xev's numb body laid next to the wall, the other man, the same he had seen in his first vision, bent down to her with a now bloody knife in his fist. He wasn't sure if he had heard his own screams or Xevs', but they went lower and lower until awful silence fell. He couldn't do anything…, it was if he was frozen, then everything went dark again, the vision faded abruptly and he “woke up”, leaning against the wall. He felt someone clasping his arm and slowly breathed in. She was here, she was alive and what he had seen was only a vision… “ Kai, what the heck is up'” Kai opened his eyes and realized that he had shed some tears…The visions were worrying him more and more now, this time they had shown him the unacceptable more clearly. Kai closed his eyes again. he inwardly called out. When he opened his eyes again, tears of rage and sadness blurred his sight and he looked away from her. The prophetess had told him that people shouldn't know too much about their future, now he could understand why…and it made no difference if this only was a possible future. He had seen what could happen, and this scared him. He could deal with his own death, but not with Xev's, this was too much.
Grimly his hands balled into fists, somewhere deep inside he felt that the visions, real or not, a possible future or not, seem to have only one purpose – to convince him of the necessity to fight, to kill, to protect. His tortured mind screamed desperately. He felt withstand against a prevention to kill fading away. What he had seen in his second vision took a lot of the hesitation away…if it was the only way to save Xev, then he would do it, somewhere deep inside him he was now very sure about that, even if his reasonable mind tried to deny that. He would never ever admit Xev's death, as long as he breathed he would find a way to prevent that! In any way! “Kai!” The voice got more worried and rang a lot fiercer through his thoughts. Xev shook him slightly. She was confused by his behavior. If he knew something that shocking and obviously horribly, why didn't he tell her' She saw his expression turning from rage to sadness, then to an hesitate firmness, as if he had come to some sort of conclusion. “Why don't you tell me anything' I thought we would share everything that concerned both of us.” Kai turned his head and he looked at her for a very long time without saying a word. “I can't,” he finally said with barely audible voice. “Why'” she asked. “I told you.” “She showed you something that isn't certain, you said, I know.” Xev said impatiently, “But…,” “I cannot Xev, accept it!” he said far sharper than he wanted to, but sometimes her stubbornness really enervated him. Xev backed off startled. Kai never had stroke such a sharp tone at her. She could see anger crossing his face. “Sorry,” she murmured. A moment of silence fell between them, Kai picked up his tools again, but he only held them without doing something. He kept his gaze at them, he wasn't able to look at Xev's hurt expression at the moment. It wasn't his intension to hurt her, and he already was sorry for his sharp reaction. But everything would become more complicated if she would become knowledge about what he already knew. It was enough that his mind was troubled with it…he was used to that. He lifted his head the same moment Xev started to say something again. “I…!” she stopped again, uncertain if it was the right thing to do. His expression was unreadable at the moment. She took a heart and continued: “I understand. Kai, whatever happens, I'll be on your side, as well as Stan, you'll never be alone again.” Hesitantly she laid her hand on his. “And I'll never ask you again. But I hope that you'll tell us everything of importance…so we can help you. I've always trusted you, and I hope that you'll trust me and Stan as well.” Kai turned his gaze back at her, still she couldn't read anything, but finally he nodded. “Thank you!” he said. Xev smiled a bit. He cocked his head to the side, his usual manner when he was weighting something. “I'll trust both of you,” he finally added. “But the prophetess told me that people shouldn't know too much of their future, then they often want to change what will happen, completely not aware of what the consequences are– and for that they were only trapped deeper in their fate - or worse. I don't want this to happen, that's the reason why I have to carry some things alone, Xev. I don't expect from you or Stan to understand that, but I expect that you respect my decision. Life already is hard enough for me!” he closed very seriously. Xev looked aside thoughtfully. She hadn't considered such facts, but she should have learned that Kai didn't do something without reason…she cursed her curious side, sometimes she really crossed the line with it. With a contrite expression she looked back at him: “Are you angry with me'” she asked. Kai's expression turned into one of surprise. He had to laugh: “No, Xev, not really. I understand the reason for your ongoing questions, I sometime was similar curious and did enough to bug other people with questioning…even if it was inappropriate. I sometime was young too…!” “Hey, I'm 4000 years old…!” Xev said indignant, her smile returned. “I always thought it's a compliment to tell a woman she's young…” he murmured, an amused glittering in his eyes. “Oh,” Xev smirked. “Besides I am 2000 years older than you, for that…!” “Stop it, it's enough, I got it,” she fend off. Kai showed a faint smile: “Okay…!” “You really bug other people with questioning'” she asked a few seconds later innocently. “Of course, and believe me, some of the questions weren't very … advisable to ask, at least not among my people.” Kai concentrated back on the work, he changed some wires and reconnected some, avoiding any other possible requests of his past, he had noticed her curiosity within the last question.
Xev smiled, well, she really didn't expect him to tell her more. Like so many times before, Kai didn't reveal anything more about his heritage and his former life than small bits and pieces, something like what he had said just now.
She sighed, she doubted that if they hadn't come across the little theatre she would have known nothing about him. In this manner he still was all mystery. Suddenly 790 turned on again and told them that he had finished and all necessary data was saved on his memory. Kai reconnected the wires to their original position and Xev took 790.
The three returned to the bridge with their moths. It was quieter on the bridge now, only Shore' and Stanley were talking about something. Xev handed 790 over to Shore' and she told 790 to transfer every data needed to develop a new protection for the Arcannea. Shore' was very happy and he left them to join his team in the provisional laboratory they had erected in a room next to the galley. The three were alone for a moment.

“So what do you think'” asked Xev and sat down on the step next to the pedestal. Stanley replied from his position above them: “About what'” “Is it possible to help them' Can they somehow use the knowledge'” “I don't know, they're the scientists and technicians, not me,” Stan said. “Kai'” Xev asked on. “As they have an advanced technology and a deeper understanding of bioorganic technology I think they should,” was the answer. “I hope so, it really would be a tragic loss when those Pr'karesh defeat them…!” Xev yawned. “Stop it Xev, I'm already tired enough…” Stan interrupted her and yawned too. “Think I should go to get some sleep then…” Xev said. “You're staying aboard'” Stan asked. “Of course, even though Shereen told us that we can stay on Arcan's, but I'm too tired to return, nighty-night!” Xev stood up and waved at them, her inquiring look at Kai was answered with a slight shake of the head. Xev shrugged her shoulders and left.
“I think I'll go too, Kai, I'm sorry, but it were some busy hours.” “It's okay, Stan, I'll see if I can help Shore' somehow,” Kai answered. “Good night then,” Stan said and left. “Good night Stanley,” Kai answered and left the bridge through the other passageway.

He really wasn't tired, so he had decided to ask Shore' if he could help. Shore' was very happy about Kai's offer, for they needed badly someone with a better skill for technology. There still were a lot of devices to connect and to assemble, and the last technicians should arrive tomorrow first. “The sooner we can start the better,” said Shore' and was relieved that he was able to take a look at some data so early. “Where the heck is this technician…!” they heard a feminine voice cursing from somewhere in the back. Kai turned and looked behind some boxes. “Do you have any problems'” Kai asked and arched one brow when he saw a young woman, barely at Xev's age, lying under a desk, constantly muttering. She moved back forth and stroked some unruly red hair back. “If you don't mind…but I think we need to check the connection to Lexx's communication system, that's where the problem lies.” The device she wanted to start was their computer system, and they needed a connection to the Arcannean database first. Kai looked at the wires and asked: “Couldn't 790 fulfill that task'” he asked. “I think your robot head is needed for the data transfer, so can you somehow connect our computer with the Lexx'” she asked. Kai nodded: “I could, do you have a receiver for the computer'” “As far as I know…yes, but actually I'm not the technician, that's Sa'k, and he's gone somewhere, grrrr,” she said angry. “Gone somewhere'” Kai asked suspiciously. “Yes, he went off into the passageway half an hour ago, I thought he had to fetch some material from the bridge, but he hadn't come back since that.” Shore' drew closer and heard her last words: “Is there a problem Ar'ata'” “Not really, but one of the technicians who should help us installing the equipment is somewhere lost…!” she said. “Mh, that shouldn't happen of course, but the Lexx is confusing, maybe he lost his way,” Shore' said. Kai had discovered the receiver and took it. “I'll look for him when I return from the installation of this device,” he said and left the chamber. “Thank you!” Ar'ata called after him and smiled. “Too bad he isn't single,” she said to Shore'. Shore' smiled: “I always thought you only have eyes for your diagrams and numbers….!” “Most of the time, yes, but I'm still a woman not a computer program!” Ar'ata snorted and went back to her work.

Kai was a little bit surprised when he saw a second moth standing on the landing platform near Lexx's main control systems. He knew exactly that Stan and Xev had gone to bed, who else could be here if not them' Carefully he entered again the huge chamber where most of Lexx's mechanical devices and data wires were. An unknown man stood in front of some of those devices and he could see that he seem to study them. “He was right…. there…no…. control…. ship.” Kai wasn't able to understand much of what the man said. Obviously he talked via squawker to someone. Kai spotted this device some moments later when he stopped talking and closed the frequency. He put the small device away and walked back the way to the moths, when Kai suddenly emerged from the shadows.
“May I help you'” Kai asked calmly. The other man was clearly appalled and shrieked back for a moment. But he recovered fast and answered quickly: “I was looking for some connection possibility to the ship, so we can connect our computer system over the Lexx's communication system with our database.” Kai's eyes narrowed a bit. Something with this man was wrong, even if he was telling something quite logically on the first sight. Of course he could have made a call with someone to ask anything, but Kai felt that the man lied. And of course there was another thing that made him more than suspicious. Casually he asked him: “I think then you may have forgotten to take this device with you. Besides, how did you find this area' No one besides us knows where it is, and no one has access to it.” The BrunnenG turned the receiver in his hands. “Sorry, I just didn't know,” the man said and looked at the device in Kai's hand then at Kai self. It didn't sound very convincing for Kai. He had to take an eye on this fellow. Something in his body tensed immediately when he looked at him and he didn't know why. Some memory told him that his reaction was normal when danger was scented…
Kai wasn't an assassin anymore, but his intense gaze was still determined and fierce enough to make another man look down sometime. And Kai wasn't very amused that this technician was weaseling around here. The man, Ar'ata had called him Sa'k, finally dropped the gaze and murmured some excuse and announced that he’ll return to his work. But somehow Kai was convinced that he only was a good actor. Something in his behavior wasn't that obedient and compliable, at least not to ordinary people. Before he could leave the chamber, Kai caught his arm and stopped him: “There's no reason for a sight seeing tour of the Lexx, if I see you somewhere else besides the chamber you were working, the galley or the bridge, I'll let Shore' know and I think this will have consequences.” For a moment Kai sensed an angry spark in Sa'ks eyes, he felt the muscles tensing under his fingers, but only for a few seconds, than the man nodded and Kai let him go. No, this fellow didn't suit him, every inch of his body told him that. And he was sure that his suspicion was right. This man wasn't what he tried to make them believe. Kai watched the moth leaving and turned to install the device, he knew that the scientists needed their communication system and he also needed some rest soon. But this incident bothered him a while. He connected the receiver and returned to the laboratory chamber. Ar'ata was jubilating when he entered. “Thank you, Kai, it works,” “You're welcome,” the BrunnenG nodded and let his gaze slide over the attendees. Sa'k was working in a corner, which calmed him a bit. He saw no need to tell Shore' now, for he had no evidence, but he again felt this strange sensation that he didn't seem to fit in among all these other people. “Did he call you a few minutes ago'” Kai asked Ar'ata, with a slight head movement at Sa'k. She looked at him with big eyes: “No, there weren't any calls since you left, why do you ask'” “Nothing of importance. If you need anything further, we're around,” Kai said to her and Shore'. “Okay, thank you. The data I have studied so far made me optimistic that we will be finished in a couple of days, two or three I think.” “Take your time,” Kai said. “Yes, but we don't have much,” Shore' said with sorrowful expression. “I know, good night,” Kai nodded and left the chamber. “Night,” Shore' put his attention back on the screen, where he had studied the data and continued his work.

Kai returned to Xev's bedroom and lay soundlessly down next to her. She was already asleep and he saw no need to wake her up. The thought about the technicians' actions bothered him still, but he didn't come to any conclusion - he fell asleep before.

The next morning, he felt someone tapping constantly on his arm. “No,” he mumbled in his pillow, “I don't want to get up Xev…!” But the tapping continued. Bedridden he opened his eyes to tell Xev again that he was still tired, but Xev's space was empty. Still half asleep he turned and looked into Stan's face. “Sorry to wake you Kai, but Shore' asked me if you can fetch some devices from the station and bring them here, to the laboratory.” “Slowly Stan, I'm not wide awake already…” Kai got into a sitting position and stroke his loose hair back. Why did they want him to go to the station, hadn't they enough technicians to do that'
Stan seemed to be in a hurry, he tried to explain him again: “Sorry. Okay, once again…” “It's alright, I understood what you said, so you want me to go to the station to fetch some things and transport them to the Lexx'” Stan smiled: “Exactly.” “Okay, just give me some minutes…!” “No problem, Xev waits for you in the moth-breeding chamber,” and then Stan was gone. Kai sighed, stood up and dressed. Why was Xev waiting there' Kai badly had to clear his still sleep-confused mind. Absently he finished his hairdo and then he left for the moth-breeding chamber.
On the way there he met Ar'ata. “Hello!” she said friendly. “Hello,” Kai answered. “Stan informed you about those devices to fetch up'” she asked. Kai nodded. “Good, is it possible to take me and two of our technicians with you'” “Yes, but tell me, why didn't fetch your own technicians the stuff, I thought you have shuttles'” Kai asked. “Seems like we have again problems out there!” She pointed above. “Sixteen evacuation ships arrived two hours ago and they need any available shuttle to bring the fugitives to the station or the planets. And they need all available technicians to repair the damage. So there's only one of our three technicians staying, and the others who should arrive today won't come.” Ar'ata said a bit desperate. Kai nodded: “I understand.” This would make the whole situation a bit more complicated. They surely would need more time now. But now he knew at least why he had to go there.

They reached the moth-breeding chamber, but Stan was nowhere in sight. Xev explained him that he had gone back to the bridge, answering an important call from Yareena. “I wonder why he hadn't gone to the station…” Kai murmured. “Are you a bit gruffy this morning'” Xev asked teasingly. Kai rolled his eyes and said: “I'm not sure but this night was somehow short.” Xev laughed and climbed into on of the moths. This now woke him up completely: “You want to go with me'” he asked astonished. “Why not' We'll need two moths…one for the people and one for the material. And besides that, Ar'ata told me that there were some very nice shopping malls there…” She pointed at Ar'ata who climbed into the second moth with two technicians. One of them was Sa'k. Immediately this strange gut feeling returned and he was reminded to the situation yesterday. He still was convinced that this man had lied. Shore' surely wasn't interested in Lexx's control systems, and he was sure the Arcannea too weren't that curious so they try to find out something on their own without permission. He glared at Sa'k as if to find out what he hadn't told him. But the technician only glared back shortly, his expression didn't give away anything. Kai seriously thought about keeping an eye on him when they reach the station, so he was a bit disappointed that Xev wanted to come with him. Not that he didn't like her to be with him, but he couldn't go with Xev and watching this guy at the same time. And telling Xev about his “suspicion-only-depending-on-some-uncertain-evidences” was out of question. Well, he had seen him communicating with someone unknown, but this wasn't evidence at all. He shrugged his shoulders and calmed down, maybe there was an opportunity to find out, he had to wait, and there was nothing else he could do at the moment.

So they left the Lexx with two moths and flew over to the Arcannea station. Ar'ata who flew the second moth lead them directly to a hangar and they landed. They left the moths after the atmosphere had recovered and the energy field protected them from the deadly vacuum in space. Behind the hangar lay a small passageway and then they entered a huge room, obviously a service room and waiting area for several hangars reachable from here. A lot of technicians and other staff hustled and bustled there.
Ar'ata had left them for a brief moment and returned with an angry look on her face. “I can't believe it…. these…oh, I could go overboard…we were put on the waiting-list, …those…those bureaucrats. they say. No matter if the work we do is important for the Alliance or not! If their tiny asses will be blown up tomorrow I'm innocent, I tell ya!” “I suppose because of the evacuation ships'” Kai asked. Ar'ata nodded. “We have to wait two or three hours, sorry. I suggest you take a look around, we should meet again here in three….!” A cracking interrupted her, then a screen above them flickered and Shereen appeared on it. Immediately silence fell around. The people stopped their work as if switched out.

“May I call your attention please'”

Xev and Kai knew immediately that this wasn't a usual procedure, the reaction of the people was scaring. Shereens face also showed a clear sad and upset expression.

“Today, two hours ago, I was informed that one of our evacuation transports from Tarron 4 and Ghe'a was attacked by the Pr'karesh and nearly had been destroyed completely. We do not have a number of victims yet, but we calculate with over 600 000 people being killed in this barbaric act of aggression. As a reaction, the council decided to stop any evacuation from those regions. We are aware that this could mean a complete take over of those planets by the Pr'karesh, but we know that at least the inhabitants weren't slaughtered…and we may have the chance to re-conquer those planets. But we will defend those planets as good as we can. The council and I hope that the people of the Alliance as well as our citizens on those planets concerned will understand our reaction. If anyone wants to leave on his own, he should do that, we will help in any way we can. Citizens and those who have relatives from Tarron 4 and Ghe'a can report to our crisis management, which will soon be erected on this station, segment 5, level 2.
The council and I want to offer our deepest condolence to all those who have lost friends, family and relatives. And we also promise that we try everything to prevent any further attacks on our citizens in the future. Thank you for your attention!”

The screen went blank and left dead silence. The people around them didn't go desperate and hysteric, but the expressions were completely serious, sad and in more than one case they could see someone cry. After several minutes, most of them started to work again, but a lot more silent and slower than before. Kai still looked at the empty screen with narrowed eyes. Xev sighed, as well as Ar'ata. Xev had seen many planets destroyed, a whole universe with countless people, this all had been weird and sometimes scary, but never before she had felt so sad for the loss of so many lives like now. Maybe because of the connection they now had to the Arcannea. Kai's attention was caught by Sa'k who hadn't shown any reaction when the president had spoken. Kai wasn't sure, but it seemed that Sa'k wasn't uncomfortable at all by this situation. Now the man turned and said in a flat voice: “I'll be back in two hours.” Then he started to walk to the exit. Ar'ata called after him: “And who should do all this bureaucratic shit'” But Sa'k didn't turn. “Hey!” Ar'ata made a face. “All the same, every time, I should talk to Shore' that we don't need such technicians, really.” Kai watched the vanishing man. “How long has he been in your team'” he asked. “Not very long. Our technical unit sent him to us. They said, he is very good, so he came to us. No idea how long he worked for them, really.” Kai nodded. “Alright, then I have to do it on my own again. You negotiate your way'” she asked. “I think so.” “Well, then we meet again in three hours, I think.” She vanished into the crowd and Xev and Kai were on their own.

Kai really wanted to know, where Sa'k had to go that suddenly, instead of helping Ar'ata with the work, but when he and Xev reached the passageways, he wasn't visible anywhere. Again this disturbing sensation flooded his stomach. “Are you coming'” Xev asked. Kai blinked, he hadn't realized that he had paused. “Where to'” He asked. Xev let an imploratory smile appear on her face. Kai sighed. The shopping mall, alright, this now promised some distraction and alternation.

How right Kai was with his assumption, he didn't guess.
Sa'k had used this welcomed opportunity to leave the Lexx again. He had sent his master the current status of information and the request how to continue with the task.
His master had given him a lot of useful information about the Lexx before he started the mission, but nothing of its crew. Maybe because his master wasn't sure about the current owner of the Lexx' He never thought that his master could lack off such important information. Well, it wasn't his fault, this ship had arrived here so surprisingly that there was no time to find out such things at once. So he was sent here for that purpose – to collect information.
And he truly had discovered some very useful and of course surprising information. First of all he was a bit surprised by the fact that the crew wasn't a mighty creature his master had called Divine Shadow with some of his guards, instead only three ordinary humans and a robot head were aboard. By revealing the crews true nature, the task got easier he had thought. So the answer came fast and expected shortly… But before he was able to continue he had to take care about the second part of his mission and with it of some more unimportant members of the crew.
So he wasn't concerned about a successful ending.

Sa'k entered one of the private meeting rooms along the shopping mall. He closed the door and looked at the three waiting men inside, who wore as well as him technician clothes. One of them was very gaunt and had dark hair. His face wasn't very friendly. The other man was much taller and looked very athletic, also his appearance was very dark. He had brown hair and a face that always showed red sports, the third one was the oldest one of them, he showed already grey hair and he had a lot of scars on his once not unattractive face. “Everything done'” the gauntly man asked. “Not completely. I have sent a request to our master and will return to the Lexx after we finished the mission here.” Sa'k said and sat down. “Where is the problem'” The other man asked. “One of the crewmembers seems to guess something. He caught me when I called you from the Lexx's main control system.” “Why hadn't you killed him at once'” “Not the right timing. We have to be careful. I thought we can eliminate that 'problem` here on the station. Do you have everything, so we can start'” The athletic man nodded and showed him a bag. “Okay. Prepare everything, we meet in two hours in hangar 46 on this level, that's where we landed, and then two of the Lexx crew will be dead as well as most people on this station. Then we only have to deal with the Captain of the Lexx, this is the man the Biovezir surely is interested in and our completion of the whole mission.” Sa'k said smiling wicked. His companions nodded, smiling in return. “Then we set the plan into action.” “Good.” Sa'k rose from the seat and left the cabin without turning.

Whilst Xev was watching the many shops, Kai had spotted Sa'k by pure chance coming out of the conference room. He watched him carefully and saw him slurry over to a cafe, where he sat down and ordered something to drink. Several minutes later the named conference room once again caught his attention. Three other men left it, also clad in technician overalls, one of them carried a heavy bag very carefully. But like with Sa'k before, the clothes didn't seem to fit…there was something wrong with them. Kai stopped nearly breathing when he recognized one of the men. He had seen him clearly in his vision…the man that wanted to kill, or killed Xev in it. Suddenly he was wide-awake. There was clearly something going on here…whatever the vision had tried to show him…it had begun.

Kai watched Sa'k carefully, the gut feeling had grew more intense, he was aware that whatever would happen now…he had to be constantly ready…he must…because he didn't want to let happen what the vision had shown him. Kai started to think back to the days he once had to plan attacks and strategies, because the few things he had seen so far reminded him very strong to a plan. Everyone maybe would have laughed about him, but what came now in his mind sounded strangely logically.
What if they were Pr'karesh…planning to attack someone or something in the deepest heart of the Alliance…if he was the bad guy - or an assassin, he would exactly do that.
The station was very important, it was their supply, their main transport way…everything.
Kai froze when he thought about all those people on the station, he knew that there were two millions coming and going in a constant flow. He had to do something, he must find out what this Sa'k and the other men were planning, but how'
His thoughts were interrupted when he felt Xev appearing next to him.
“Here you are, what you're doing, staring into space'” Kai shook his head, and Xev followed his gaze. “That's one of the technicians who flew with us back to the station, isn't he'” Another nod. “Why do you watch him'” “Something is wrong here, Xev…I can feel that!” Xev looked more than surprised at him. Kai never had declared some gut feelings that clearly before. “What do you mean'” she asked skeptically and laid her hand on his arm. Kai looked at her, without taking his attention off Sa'k. “I should explain you…!” he said and told her about the incident in Lexx's main control chamber and everything he had observed after, except for the visions he had received from the prophetess, for the obvious reason.
“Strange, indeed. And you really think that he may can be a Pr'karesh'” “Perhaps,” was Kai's answer.
At least, it could make any sense. Assumed he was from Pr'karesh, could it be that he knew something about the Lexx too' Better said the one who had sent him here' The Pr'karesh use the insect technology, obviously based on Cluster technology, and the Lexx also was partially insect – and built on the Cluster. This could explain Sa'ks knowledge about where the Lexx's main control systems were…Kai hadn't believed in a coincidence, and he knew that Sa'k lied at him when he said that he found it by chance. Someone must have told him, someone who knew the Lexx… Allowedly, all this thoughts sounded a bit strange, even in his own ears, but the logic in it quite hurt. But also there was no one he could think about who had this knowledge, besides His Divine Shadow…and this last insect was definitely dead. How should he know then' Who could be the one responsible for all this' He hadn't any idea, because he hadn't been really aware of anything these 2000 years he had spent on the Cluster. “So, what should we do'” Xev asked and once again snapped him out of his train of thoughts.
“The best idea I have at the moment…” Kai said. “…is to watch him, he's waiting for something, and we should stay close to him…it's our only chance to learn what's going on.” “Alright, I trust you, Kai…” Xev sighed inwardly. Admitted, it was anyone’s guess…but she ever had trusted him, and the things he had said were somewhat concerning, even if he hadn't told her everything…she was sure about that.


They watched Sa'k from their hidden place behind some plants and after two hours they followed him inconspicuously. He made his way back to he hangar where they had landed two hours ago, and just as Xev wanted to tell Kai that he may had been wrong, he may have interpreted his feelings wrong, they saw how he met with two of the three men Kai had observed before, and vanished around a corner into a side passageway.
Kai signified Xev to stay behind and followed them. Slowly he sneaked around the corner and covered behind some boxes. He only was five meters away from them, but he couldn't hear what they were speaking, because they did it in a hushed tone. But he could clearly see that the bag, the one had carried, was nearly empty now. The gauntly man put his hand inside the bag and showed Sa'k a small black device. In his other hand he held two other different devices. Sa'k threw a short glance at them, then nodded and the gauntly man put them back. The third man he had seen with them before, was missing, maybe he was somewhere else and waited for further instructions…Kai was able to take a good look at the devices they had…and he recognized them immediately. With sudden realizing he knew what they were about. His lips formed a small line and he didn't try to imagine what might happen if they succeed in what they were about to do. He had to stop them, the sooner the better, for he didn't know how much time was left now.
He had seen enough and advanced backward carefully.
Xev looked inquiring at him when he met her in the main passageway. Many people were running up and down, technicians entering and leaving the service room, which lead to their hangar. He grabbed Xevs shoulders and shoved her around a corner. “I was right, they plan to destroy the station,…” he said darkly. “What'! Are you sure'” she asked terrified. “I know the devices they want to use for that task, believe me…I've worked with them a very long time,” he answered grimly. “Oh my God. What we're waiting for' We must stop them…!” Xev wanted to run back. “Wait!” Kai held her back firmly. The pictures of her, screaming and maybe dying returned with full force. “You have to go and find Yareena, Stan's girlfriend. She's the chief of security here… “ “But…!” “No buts, Xev…” “Oh yes, do you know how much time we have left' If this are time fuzes…you understand, maybe it's the only chance to stop them and save the station…!” she said firmly. Kai hesitated. Of course, he didn't know how much time was left, it would be impossible to part and try to stop them in this way, one of those Pr'karesh was missing, he didn't know where he was, but they knew where Sa'k and his companions were, whatever the fourth man was good for…these three were definitely the important one's. Kai closed his eyes for a moment and suddenly it became clear to him that he wasn't able to stop the chain-reaction of events beginning from now on…soon he would know if the visions had shown the truth or if he was able to do something completely different to prevent it.
“Let's go, before it's too late,” Xev said determinedly, Kai wouldn't stop her from going with him, whatever scared him about this thought. “Xev, I don't want to happen…” Kai tried a last time, but he knew that he had lost already. “…something to me' I know. But I'm a big girl. And if we're two we have a far bigger chance to stop them…you know that you're not an invulnerable dead assassin anymore,” she pointed out. It was senseless, he knew it and with a slight nod he gave in…but the worried look on his face grew deeper.

They turned around the corner again and saw the three villains entering the service room in front of the hangar. For Kai it was clear that they planned to escape with the moth…to the Lexx, after they had ignited the bombs. There was no other way to get away from the station then using the moths – after ignited the bombs. Another reason more they had to stop them.
Stan would clearly be in danger…and if Sa'k succeeded, he could do anything to force Stan to do whatever he wanted to do, Stan wasn't the greatest hero of all times, even though Kai would never blame him for that. Stan had his good sides, if the scales really had to tip to their side, he was there when needed! Hopefully Sa'k didn't know anything about the key and Stan's function. But either he knew or not…they had to stop him.
They followed them, nearly running through the crowd of technicians and staff working there. Kai spotted Ar'ata in the crowd and grabbed her arm. “Tell the people to go, evacuate this hangar, inform Yareena, quickly, we're after some terrorists who have bombs, they want to destroy the station!” Kai said hastily and moved on. Ar'ata stood dumbstruck for a moment but then she moved as fast as lightning.
Kai and Xev couldn't follow the things going on outside any longer, because now they entered hangar 46 through the small passageway. Their moths were somewhere in the back and out of their way.
They watched one of the men putting the last bomb, the devices Kai had recognized as such, in place. Kai knew that he hadn't any weapon, and he was sure they must have some, but he had to take the risk, there was no other way…

He closed the distance between him and the gauntly man who stood not far away from him. The moment of surprise was clearly on their side, so he was able to grab the man and put his arm firmly around his neck. “Put the bomb away Sa'k, and lay down the time fuze!” He said with his strong baritone voice to Sa'k and the athletic man. He felt the men’s body tensing when he tried to resist, but a more firm pressure of is arm and he gave in. Kai suddenly felt strangely calm…it had begun, he had indeed took up the fight…and he was willingly to end it in every possible way from now on, there were no questions, no hesitation in his mind any longer, the adrenaline level rose up when he looked around to survey the situation.
The athletic man slowly put down the time fuze and withdrew from it a few steps. Sa'k, who had adjusted something, froze only for the tiniest part of a second, then he slowly turned. Sa'k wasn't surprised, he was prepared for everything…of course, he really didn't expect this man to be here…but he knew from the beginning that there was something with this dark man he shouldn't underestimate. “You cannot stop us…it's already too late!” He said calm.
“Put down the bomb!” Kai ordered unflinching. “Or he'll die.” “He's a soldier and accustomed to death, there's nothing you can bargain with…!” Sa'k said smiling cruelly. “Oh, sure, there's something we can deal with!” Xev said grimly and used the opportunity to speed up in her lizard mode…Sa'k was really surprised for a moment and Xev bumped him a few meter back, the bomb fell off his hands. Kai had to smile a bit. The girl was amazing. Xev looked sharply at the athletic man who wanted to step forward again, he stopped. She picked up the bomb and threw it into the energy barrier. Then she wanted to collect the time fuze, but suddenly she felt someone’s hand on her shoulder and a weapon pressed next to her head. “Let him go or I kill her…!” Sa'k bellowed at Kai. Kai hadn't seen Sa'k moving, the fast recovery of this man surprised him. Inwardly he cursed…Sa'k was clearly an experienced fighter…he shouldn't have underestimated him that much… he thought bitterly and looked at the not less surprised Xev, but she said bravely: “No, don't…!” But he knew that it was senseless, Sa'k would kill her in an instant if he hesitated, he had been the same sort of killer before, cold-blooded and merciless in his attempt to reach an aim. Slowly he let the man go…there wasn't anything he could do now. The gauntly man massaged his neck and threw a dark glance at Kai. “Take the time fuze, Gran,” Taleron ordered the gauntly man. Gran smiled wolfishly and picked it up, then another blaster appeared, this time in his hands. He returned to Kai and revolved him, Kai didn't move any inch, but his eyes constantly followed attentively every movement of Gran. “I'm convinced that Taleron would be very happy to see all of them imprisoned…!” “No names, Sran,” Sa'k fizzled at the athletic man who had stepped next to him meanwhile. “Maybe he would, but they're just dead weight….!”
Kai listened attentively…, this name was somehow familiar…
Sran twitched when he heard Sa'ks rebuke and stopped talking. Sa'k waved with his weapon to the middle of the room and said: “Come on, over there, both of you.” Kai slowly moved towards Xev and Sa'k, his mind working as fast as he never thought it could work. He was developing strategies and counterstrategies…only half aware that this part of him once had been one of his assassin skills. He looked at Xev, tried to calm her down a bit with a cautionary expression on his face, for he could see that she wanted to do something, anything…
Xev watched her beloved moving next to her, more upset than calmed when she saw his expression. Then Sa'k let finally go of her, the weapon still pointing at both of them. She looked again back at Kai, but there wasn't any sign that he was about to do something. Why not' She asked herself. Time was running down, she had been able to take a look at the small device Kai had called a time fuze when Gran picked it up again, and the number on it wasn't a huge one…this was something she could say without the ability to read.
Sa'k now moved back to one of the walls, returned to the work he had started before the appearance of Kai and Xev disturbed his work, he started to connect another device, he now put out of the bag, between the wires and buttons inside. From here they wanted to ignite the second part – directly with this device. Their fourth man would ignite the first part from elsewhere and then join them here to leave with them after they ignite the second part. In all the estimated chaos he would not be constricted to come here. But now there was a problem.
The bomb, the woman had been able to destroy seconds ago should have been the third part…, they couldn't ignite the third line of the installed bombs with the time fuze now. Sa'k knitted his brows. The time fuze should ignite this bomb and start the chain reaction of the third line after they had left the station. But without the bomb it wasn't possible…there was only one thing how to succeed in igniting both lines. By reprogramming the time fuze…it had to replace the bomb and transfer the signal of the last exploding bomb of the second line to the first bomb of the third line. They wouldn't have much time to leave the station before the third line would complete the destruction of the station, less time than before. So their fourth man would die in this explosion…but well, it was a sacrifice for the greater cause…Sa'k thought disinterested. He called Sran and ordered him to take the time fuze from Gran and reprogram it in the wanted kind.
Gran now put his full attention towards Kai and Xev, he was the one with the blaster and so the better guard for the two captives. Sran followed his orders and started to program the time fuze anew, he walked around to get a clearer signal of the bomb placed some levels above them.

This maybe could be her chance, two of them were distracted by their evil work. Xev was thinking fast, …they should use this opportunity. Gran would also be distracted for a moment if she decided to attack Sran and Kai could disarm Gran at the same time, whilst she could finish the other guy…and they suddenly had a new chance to stop Sa'k from igniting the bombs placed allover the station.
Sa'k nodded at Gran: “I'm sure we can ignite the other half without problems, and we have enough time to leave the station!” he said. Gran smiled: “I was afraid the loss of our bomb would diminish our planned destruction grade…!” “There's always a second possibility,” Sa'k answered and grinned.
Xev bit her lips, it was really time to do something…if Sran moved just a bit closer to her
…and really, suddenly he did her the favor…Xev started to move, with a clusterlizard howl she jumped at him and kicked him hard between the legs, the time fuze slid over the floor. “Xev, nooo…!” Kai shouted when he realized what she was doing. He already had a plan…but Xev's overhasty reaction was the thing that could end up in a mess. But of course…it was too late. There was nothing to do than to stop Gran from firing at her. The guard was the most dangerous threat now. He jumped at him and threw him to the ground. Gran was surprised and the weapon fell to the floor. Kai also rolled over the floor to escape Sa'ks shot he had expected from the moment he had attacked Gran. From the corner of his eye he had seen Sa'ks fast reaction and the movement to draw his weapon. The next shot from him would surely apply for Xev. After she had brought her opponent down, she was on the way to stop Sa'k from what he was doing, she clearly underestimated Sa'ks skill to handle two opponents at the same time, and Sa'k had a gun, and she hadn't.
Kai ignored his own foe after he had knocked him hard to the ground and as fast as he could he whirled around and dragged Xev out the line of fire. The shot was aimed well and it surely had killed her if Kai hadn't intervened, instead the shot only hit Xev's leg. She cried out in pain and fell to the floor. Kai let her slid down, there was no time to take care of her now. He reached for Gran's weapon, which laid only a step in front of him, right next to the, fortunately, unconscious man Xev had knocked down, and fired at Sa'k. Sa'k only smiled wickedly and took cover. Kai missed him clearly. “As I told you, it's already too late…!” And Sa'k connected the last wire and activated the second line of bombs. It was not important any longer if his companion elsewhere on the station already had ignited the first part…the situation was beyond his control since those two interfered and he now only counted on luck that he was able to leave the station elsewhere, well, the third line won't explode, so he knew where to go to be save from any destruction.
Kai could feel very clearly the rumbling that went through the station. The exploding bombs did their work. Sa'k fired once again at him and then vanished with a dry laugh through the small passageway. Kai ducked and cursed, he didn't want Sa'k to escape…but he couldn't leave Xev…and he had to take care about the time fuze. He lifted it up where it had slid and breathed a sigh of relieve, Sran hadn't been able to end his work. Some bombs would never explode.
He deactivated the time fuze, ripped it apart, made it useless. If the remaining and at the moment unconscious terrorists woke up and got the time fuze back, they surely were in the position to reactivate it if they had the chance. With another sigh he threw the parts into the energy barrier. He didn't know the current amount of damage, but it was a vaguely good sign that this part of the station seemed to be undamaged - yet. A new shock of explosions was suddenly detectable.



Chapter 17

A generous sacrifice

The assault caught the Arcannea flat fooded.
For all the world to see, a huge part of the station was ripped open in a gigantic explosion. Several ships close by were effected by that and the debris damaged them, some of them
started to burn, whilst others crashed down onto other parts of the station in the hectically attempt to flee. Undamaged parts of the station were set on fire for a short moment, before the oxygen was used up and the vacuum of the space extinguished the flames. It was a chaotic mass everywhere around.
But fortunately there was much less chaos on the station, thanks to Ar'ata, she had reached Yareena's bureau in time to let her at least sent out a warning to all the people on the station. So the worst chaos was avoided, the people were prepared at least a little when the explosions spread all over the station.
The plan of Sa'k and his accomplices had been, to let the vacuum do the rest of the work when they successful had blast several holes into the weakest points of the station: the hangars and the observing places…because they weren't able to transport enough explosive material to the station without risk. The plan was good, but it was great luck for the Arcannea that only half of the bombs exploded so far and thanks to Ar'atas warning, the security was able to close the security doors to the most sensitive and populated regions. These tiny little actions prevented the station from the worst – to be torn apart. Nobody knew how many victims this act of terror demanded, because there were surely enough people trapped behind security doors, but for a complete evacuation of some of these areas hadn't been enough time. They had to live with the knowledge that they sacrificed some few lives to safe the rest of the station and with them most of the people on it.
Slowly it became clear to them all that they were luckier than they thought at the first sight.
Through all the shock they suffered now, Yareena organized help everywhere and instructed her crews to help the injured and shocked people, to help some trapped people out of uncritical areas and to secure critical areas. She also called Shereen on Sha'ra to inform her about the incident. Yareena left no doubt that her friend wanted those who were responsible for these actions, and Ar'ata had to tell her again and again about Kai's warning of a bomb in hangar 645, and that he and Xev followed those guys who want to blow up the station with it.
Yareena threw a look at her screens and couldn't suppress a groan, one of the huge rifts run close, very close by the named hangar. Biotechnology or not…such huge rifts wouldn't heal at once and soon. Ar'ata turned pale and had to sit down. “Do you think…they're…'” “I …don't know, the chance that they're still alive isn't very big, admitted. But many people need help now, and I can't play master over life and death…, we have to concentrate to those regions where we have the biggest hope to find survivors…” Ar'ata was a bit upset: “But without their warning everything would have gone worse, maybe the whole station would have blasted…we can't leave them on their own, we owe them …” Yareena made a face: “I know that, Ar'ata, god,” “Let me go, I'll go, just give me two or three of your men, or volunteers,…” Ar'ata said. “It's too dangerous…!” “I know, just let me, I owe them my life.” “Okay, I'll ask for free capacity and volunteers, that's all I can do!” Yareena said and activated her already overcharged communication system. “Thank you,” Ar'ata nodded and waited patiently.

At the same time, in the named hangar 645, Kai knelt down next to Xev and examined her injury. Xev was a bit pale and dizzy. “Ouch, that damn hurts,” she murmured. “I know,” he said with knitted brows and a worried look at her leg. The skin was heavily burnt right under her left knee and he was certain that the bone was also broken. She would need some medical help.
Suddenly they heard a sharp screeching sound from somewhere and Kai could feel the ground vibrating again. Kai looked up and his gaze wandered over the hangar walls. “We've got to go, the walls stability is distressed and I'm not sure how long they can withstand the pressure.”
Xev nodded with tightly squeezed lips and tried to get up…of course without success. Kai shook his head and bent down to lift her up.
Both hadn't recognized that Gran regained his consciousness meanwhile and had only waited for a chance to attack again. Now he saw his chance and got to his feet. Xev sound out a warning cry and Kai stepped aside just in time. Gran tried to get to the weapon Kai had laid down beneath Xev when he started to look at her injury, but Xev was faster, she knew that neither she had the chance to shoot without risking Kais life too, nor that Kai could get the weapon in time, so she threw the blaster over the floor somewhere far back into the hangar. Gran howled in anger, but hadn't the time to concentrate on Xev, Kai already attacked him and both men were now fighting. It wasn't really a relief that Kai fought this danger, because she could see that the other man was regaining his consciousness too. The only chance she saw was that she could reach the knife before he would. It only lay a few steps ahead, but the injury made it almost impossible to move. The pain in her leg was increasing every time she moved, and despite her strong clusterlizard nature she was nearly helpless when the sharp pain shot through her body. She sank back, cursing herself and her stupidity.

The athletic man groaned when he woke up, the pain was fading but the sensitive place between his legs still hurt terribly. He cursed the woman and looked around. But what he saw let him nearly forget the pain…there she was, sitting on the floor, seemingly unable to move because of some sort of injury, he saw her struggling to get to his knife, which lay perfectly out of reach – and she was unprotected. Her companion struggled with Gran and was perfectly distracted. Sran bared his teeth and started to grin evil. “I'll make sure that you won't kick anyone with any leg any longer, bitch!” he murmured and got to his feet.
Xev's eyes widened when she saw the man drawing nearer. The wicked grin on his face didn't promise anything good. He reached the knife and picked it up. Xev let out a sharp Lizard growl to intimidate Sran, but without success, her incapability to do anything was too obvious. Slowly and with huge efforts she advanced backward, knowing exactly that she couldn't do anything better. Xev threw a desperate gaze sideward, but Kai was still fighting with Gran. She growled again when Sran came closer and closer, the knife glinted deadly in his fist. If Kai hadn't the chance to help her, she had to fight as best as she could, she didn't want to give up crying like a little girl… “Kai!” she finally cried out, only to let him know that there was a second threat now. But something in her voice must have given her desperate situation away. Her friend threw a hasty gaze at her and recognized the situation immediately. Something shot through his body and he doubled his efforts to get rid off Gran. The fight was very tiring and he slowly felt his strength fading. Xev had been right, to fight against other people with only ordinary human strength wasn't easy. But the anxiety something could happen to Xev now, let more adrenaline rush through his veins and he attacked Gran harder than before. He knocked him to the ground and before he knew what he did, his hand reached for Grans neck…with a dry snap the mans' neck broke and the body slumped to the floor. Kai pressed his lips together when he realized that he had killed this man. But he hadn't time to think about that now, Xev needed his help. His gaze left the dead figure on the ground and wandered over to Xev, whose retreat had already been stopped by the hangar wall. There was no way for her to escape…but she tried to face the approaching threat as brave as she always was, but the fear in her eyes gave her innermost away. The situation suddenly felt strangely familiar to him…Xev growling, threatened by an enemy, he had seen this scenery before…. He felt a bitter taste in his mouth when he remembered…the visions. They were about to come true. For a moment he froze where he was…it was the exact situation he had seen two times before. And one of it had shown Xev dying…anger filled him, no, he wouldn't admit that! Never! But everything he saw in front of his eyes leaded to that conclusion - he would never be there in time to knock the Pr'karesh down, who had lifted his knife with a big smile in his ugly face.
Kai sprinted forward…he couldn't think about anything else than to save Xev and there was only one thing left to do…the only chance to save her…

Xev tried her best to defend herself, she could avoid the first blow of his knife by pushing sideward away from the wall, but she knew exactly that the second blow would hit her…she hadn't the strength to keep away from him a second time, the pain was too strong, Xev screamed full of anger and frustration and closed her eyes…waited for the inevitable.
But instead of the expected blow with the knife she felt something, better said someone, cockling onto her and hissing: “Stay down Xev..”
It was Kai. He hadn't reacted a second too late. He pressed Xev down to the ground and protected her with his own body. The next second it would have been to late…instead of Xex, it was Kai who felt the sharp blade penetrating through his skin. He knew this…he had experienced the same once, a long time ago. His body tensed when he felt the cold blade cutting through his flesh…then he felt the pain exploding from where Sran had injured him. Kai breathed sharply in, 6000 years ago he had died after this moment, because his heart had been sliced, but this time, the knife failed his heart, and he was fully conscious when the knife was withdrawn with an angry curse. Despite that all, Kai knew that he had to do something, if Sran was able to kill him now, he also would kill Xev a few moments later and nothing would be won. So he ignored the pain and his injury and used the opportunity of Srans surprise by his unexpected action. Kai got to his feet and blocked the mans' arm, prevented another blow and pushed Sran backwards, away from Xev. With a series of hard strokes and kicks he brought Sran down. But Kai felt his strength fading slowly, the injury was demanding its price, if he wasn't able to stop Sran soon, he would loose. Sran realized the upcoming advantage with a wicked grin and both men rolled struggling over the floor. Even without his injury, Sran would have been a lot stronger, and Kai was loosing ground very fast. In the middle of this wild fight, Sran was able to pin Kai to the ground and lifted his knife once again. Kai caught his wrist just in time and tried to get free. With a desperate effort he finally threw them around, but he had to let go of Srans wrist and the Pr'karesh used this sudden chance to push the knife down, with all strength he stabbed it into Kai's body once again. Kai fell to his side and groaned low. Half unconscious he lay there, almost incapable to move. He felt his strength fading very very fast now. Sran didn't make a move to finish Kai. He was sure that he had the time for that pleasurable business later, now he still wanted the woman. He looked around for another weapon, because his knife still stuck in Kai's body, he didn't want to risk another struggle, in the case Kai still hadn't enough. He noticed the blaster Xev had thrown over the floor. Almost unhurried he walked over to it and picked it up.
Xev had followed Kais advice not to move, to stay down. So she could follow the fight only partially, the fact that she could see Sran now standing again and coming towards her with a blaster in his hand shocked her. What had happened to Kai' She straightened up again and looked up to Sran, who blocked her sight now. Xev gulped…was this the end'' Had Kai failed' Was he dead' Well, if he was, she didn't see a reason to stay alive too. Xev pressed her back to the wall again, she sighed…she couldn't remember that they both were ever in such a mess.

Kai bit his teeth together and fought the terrible pain spreading allover his body now. His hand clutched the knife handle, which was right under his last rip. He threw a gaze over to where Xev was anew confronted with Sran. Fear crept into his heart when he saw the blaster in Srans hand. With all his remaining strength he pulled the knife out and ignored the blood and the dizziness. He got somehow to his feet and sneaked up to Sran who had his back in his direction.

Before Sran was able to bring himself in position to shoot, Xev could see a shadow appearing right behind the Pr'kareshs' back. She needn't to see Kai, she knew that it was him, then everything happened as fast as lightning. She saw how Kai's hand grabbed Srans' chin from behind and with the knife he held in his other, he cut his throat. With a surprised look on his face, Sran fell to his knees and with a final moan he fell back dead, when Kai made a step aside. Xev gulped and looked up at Kai. She could see several scratches and bruises on his handsome face, something she really wasn't accustomed to. Kai lifted his head and looked at her with an expression she would never forget in her life. The fact that he had killed again seem to hit him right here and now with full force. He dropped his gaze to the dead man and to his own blood covered hands, then he let the knife fell down and closed his eyes for a moment. Xev leaned back on the wall and breathed in sharply, the first audible sound she was able to let out since minutes. Before Xev could say a word, Kai moved like in trance and pulled her into his arms, he lifted her up and carried her out of this hangar. Xev became dizzy again and let her head sank on his shoulder. “Thank you!” she whispered. Kai didn't answer, he just carried her through the small passageway back into the large room where he had told Ar'ata to evacuate all those people around here. She must have been successful, no one else was here, at least some people who could escape all those death that surely had spread all around the station minutes ago. He knew that they weren't able to make it back to the main passageways outside, so he hoped that anytime someone would find them in here, even if the chance wasn't very big, he noticed that the doors to this room were closed and sealed, an evidence that this area counted not as save. He moved over to some boxes and some other material on the floor and laid Xev carefully down to the floor. She needed some medical aid, and if he remembered well, then one of those boxes around should contain such material. In places where technicians were working, those things were inalienable. He spotted the right one five meters away and fetched it. When he bent down, he nearly lost his consciousness. A sharp wave of pain raced through his body and he had to steady himself on the wall. He suppressed a groan and bit on his lips. Not now, Xev needed his help, and he knew that the chance that she was able to call for help was much bigger than his own chances. With every passing minute he grew weaker, and the blood from his wounds already seeped through his clothes. He returned to Xev much slower and sat down next to her.
“Am I still alive'” Xev asked, everything blurred around her, even her stronger side, the lizard couldn't compensate the horrible pain. She asked herself what kind of weapon Sa'k had used. Her leg felt like completely burnt and broken, even if only the part right under her knee was affected. “Does your leg hurt'” Kai asked, whilst he examined her leg again carefully. “Ouch, damn, yes,…!” Xev screamed and threw an angry look at him, slowly propped herself on her elbows and looked down at her leg. Kai cleaned his hands and commented dry: “That answers your first question…you're still alive!” “It burns like hell…!” she murmured dazed. Kai took some bandages from the medical kit and a salve. “We need professional medical aid soon, Xev, it's only first aid…!” he said and concentrated on her leg, not only to bandage it, also to hide his agonized expression. It took him a while before he risked it and looked up again. He finished his first aid, by putting the leg down on a soft piece of something he had found beneath one of the boxes around. Xev sighed and blinked. The salve cooled her leg a bit and took the pain away. Slowly she was able to recognize her environment more clearly. “Thank you!” she said. It was touching how Kai cared about her…not only now, but before too. She shivered when she thought about the fight in the hangar. It was luck that they were able to escape alive. She looked at Kai who sat next to her, his lips pressed together and curved up in a tantalized smile. She noticed that he was unusual pale and he couldn't hide a slight trembling. He looked so tired, well no wonder, he had fought the first real fight since he was alive. It must have been exhausting and hard… especially to kill again. She bit on her lip when she thought back to his expression. It had been so cold, so emotionless…when he had cut the mans' throat, but his eyes showed what really lay behind all that. She had seen the cold-blooded killer on the outside, but the worried and nearly desperate man who loved her behind it, in his eyes. The man who exactly knew that she would have died if he hadn't killed again. She could still see that this act of violence troubled him deeply, but they hadn't had any other choice, Xev needn't to tell him that. She tried to grab his hand but she got out of balance and nearly fell on her back. Kai caught her and drew one of the boxes nearer and shoved it behind her, so she could lean back again.
But this was the last thing Kai was able to do for her. He had to lean on some boxes on her left side, coldness and darkness crept into his mind. “Kai'” he heard Xev's worried voice from far away. Pain shot again through his body, much intense than before, he groaned, seconds later he started to tremble and sank completely down. Xev was full conscious at once when she saw what happened. “KAI!” a terrified scream came from somewhere deep of her throat and she tried to catch him. She desperately needed to know what happened to her beloved, so Xev ignored her own pain and turned a bit to help him to lie down.
She lay her hand on his back to steady him, but this wasn't easy with her current handicap.
Then she suddenly felt something warm and wet where she had touched him and withdrew her hand with knitted brows…her fingers were red…terrified she noticed that it was blood – not her own, not the blood of their enemies – it was his blood. Her anxiety grew, what had happened during the fight she hadn't been able to see' Kais head sank forward, slowly she let him slid into her lap. His eyes were half open now, beads of sweat formed on his forehead and his breath came intermittent. She noticed that he had pressed his right hand onto his left side, it was red of blood too. Xev gulped and loosened it carefully. The blood was fresh. The second injury he had kept quiet about.
His bloody fingers enclosed hers and he groaned again. “Kai…!” her voice broke. Tears welled up and they started to run down her cheeks. Her mind raced…those injuries, they were surely caused from the knife, but how…' A chilliness took possession of her heart when it became more and more clear to her…could it be…could he really have done that' A new sob came up her throat, her mind tried to understand…but why else should have Kai covered her body with his own, only seconds before she was sure Sran would kill her with is knife'! The wound on his back…there he must have hit Kai. The sob escaped her throat…he had saved her life and risked his own, and despite his injury he had fought Sran, must have got the second injury somehow during the struggle, possibly short before Sran had threatened her a second time. Now that she saw the seriousness of his injuries she asked herself how he managed to kill Sran, to take her out of the hangar and cared for her wounds. She shook her head desperately: “No, what…what have…what have you done'” She was used to the fact that he had saved her life many times, that he had protected her life by using his own body to catch deadly energy-blasts…but this was when his body had been dead, decarbonized, invulnerable…now there was a huge difference…but nonetheless he had done it, used his body to catch the knife blows. Softly she stroke over his cheek. Kai's eyes opened and he smiled weakly: “I…I have promised that I'll never admit…anything happen to you Xev!” “No Kai, please not…!” she protested, but it was senseless…it was already too late. She could feel his blood wetting her skin. With a short look at the first aid kit, she suddenly moved and with inhuman strength she grasped his body and propped him up, with gritted teeth she opened his jacket and removed it quickly. Kai screamed of pain and surprise because of the sudden movement. Xev did her best to ignore it. “I'm sorry,” she murmured and sprawled out to catch the first aid kit. His injuries were indeed very serious and still bleeding. She laid him down again and tried to stop the bleeding with some cloth. But after some minutes it became clear that her efforts were nearly senseless. “That's not fair!” she sobbed. Kai caught her hand when she took a new cloth. “Don't…” he said low, “Xev…!” his voice was very weak and he barely was conscious. “You have to get out of here, soon. You have to tell them that Sa'k escaped…that he possibly wants to go back to the Lexx, Stan might be in danger…!” he stopped when a new wave of pain raced through his body. He took a deep breath, hopefully it wasn't too late. He may have prevented one of the possible things he had seen in his vision, but he wasn't sure if he was able to influence any other things in the future. He knew, far better than Xev, that his life was about to end without medical aid very soon. And he didn't saw any possible med-team coming here the next hour. “Why should Sa'k return to the Lexx'” “I don't know, he has been there before, and we don't know what he had done in Lexx' main control room….I'm almost sure that to destroy the station was only a part of their plan…!” Kai stopped and closed his eyes exhausted for a moment. “Shhh, alright, I'll tell them, I don't want to happen anything to Stan or the Lexx. Don't talk too much, you need some rest!” A desperate smile flitted over his face. “I can't, there's something else…you remember our discussion with Shereen, on Sha'ra'” he continued. Xev nodded. “We speculated about where the Pr'kresh may got their technology from, their insect technology…” “You said, that someone could have survived the fall of the Cluster, survived the destruction of the light universe, like us…!” Xev said. “Yes…!” Kai was interrupted by a cough. Xev pressed her lips together and took some more bandages and provided his injuries by bandaging them. It would at least stop the wounds from bleeding too much. “Yes, the bombs they used…they're another proof for that theory. They're Cluster technology…” another cough. “I…I have used them when I was in the service of His Divine Shadow. Someone with the knowledge of such things must be the one we should concentrate on.” “Any ideas'” she asked. Kai shook his head…there was something, he was aware of that, since he had heard the name…, the name reminded him to something, he had heard it before, he should remember, but he couldn't catch it, his concentration faded more and more, the pain was already too severe. “Kai'” The BrunnenG almost lost consciousness, hadn't Xev called him. He was so tired… “Kai…please, say something!” Kai opened his eyes again. “I…,” his voice was very weak at once, barely audible. She caught his hand and stroke softly over the back of his hand. “I'll try to look for help, Kai, my leg still hurts like hell, but it's nothing, compared with your injuries…!” Kai slowly lifted his hand and pointed at the first aid kit. “You see the syringe'” Xev nodded and picked it up. “It's a anaesthetic…it numbs your pain if you shot it into your leg…!” Xev looked from Kai to the syringe, then to her leg. After a short moment of hesitation she removed the hood and shot the anaesthetic into her leg. She felt the effect at once. Her pain really was reduced, but another effect was that she couldn't move her leg…well, with that she could cope somehow. “It works…!” she said. Kai smiled “Of course…” “Couldn't it help you as well'” she asked and looked for another one. “There was only one inside…and you have better use for it, you're the one who can at least do something.” Xev nodded. He was right, she had to call for help. With a skeptically gaze to the exit she moved and laid Kai down to the floor, slowly she propped herself up, maybe she could crouch…the distance wasn't big, but with her injured leg it seemed to be an insurmountable obstacle. But she had to make it, Kai's life depended on it. “Xev…” Kai's voice held her back. She looked down to him and needed everything to stay calm. He fought hard to stay conscious, but it was obvious that he was about to loose. He stretched out his hand and Xev took it. “I…love you,” he whispered softly. Somewhere deep inside he was glad, despite his worse condition. At least he had been able to prevent the things he had seen in his visions. Xev was alive, there was nothing to worry about now.
Xev's lips trembled and she ignored the tears running down her cheeks again. “I love you too….!” she answered with tear-drowned voice. She bent down to stroke his face, to kiss him. “I'll call for help, I promise. Please, Kai, please hang on, okay'” “I try…!” Kai said weak. Xev reached for his jacket and covered his body with it. Lovingly she stroke over his face again and looked deep into his pain marked eyes until he closed them and lost his consciousness. Xev let hung her head a moment before she turned and started to crouch across the floor, slowly the door came into reach. She was glad about the anaesthetic…without it, she was sure that she hadn't made the first meters. It took her an eternity until she passed half the way…Xev looked back and sighed, she advised herself…The anxiety about Kai and the possible decreasing of the anaesthetic let her continue a second later. She reached the door, and of course… it didn't open. Like Kai before, she assumed that it was closed to reduce the risk of another leak, in the case a bomb would explode in this hangar. she muttered to herself. she asked on. She saw nowhere a mechanism that would open the door…but…wait. Above her on the right side was a plate where something was written on. She couldn't read it, but the picture on it looked like a mechanism to short-circuit the door if an emergency occurred. Troubled she got up on her right leg and opened the panel with some effort. Under the lid was a button and she pushed it immediately. A snap and fizzling was hearable and she could see the door move a few inches. There was now a gap between the two parts of the door. She got down on her knees again and crouched back to it, put her finger between the gap and tried to shove them apart. The first minute they didn't move a bit and Xev cursed loudly. “Oh come on, you silly doors, move!” Again she put all her strength into this and suddenly the gap grew bigger and bigger. “Yes, just a little bit…come ooon!” Finally the gap was big enough, so she was able to squeeze through. She didn't rest to take a breath, her next aim was to find someone who could help them. Outside, the passageway was deserted, nothing lay around like in the service room, where Kai still was, the passageway looked as if it was cleaned…as her gaze wandered to her left side, she understood immediately why. The rift Yareena had seen on her screens ran exactly twenty meters at Xev's left side, only an energy field protected the area from the deadly vacuum. Xev gulped, they really really had been lucky. Nevertheless, this area held some danger, anything could happen here, from malfunction of the energy field till a sudden material fatigue…well, she couldn't imagine how bio-organic material could fatigue, but who knows' It was time to vanish. Suddenly she was sure that she had heard something…voices. Several seconds later she saw someone coming round the edge, she smiled a bit and started to call.

Ar'ata hadn't counted that so many people were willing to help, but what astonished her most was that suddenly a troop of six security guards appeared, Admiral Te'ran in front...he looked very serious and took her aside. "Yareena told me that you're one of Dr. Shore's team members, is that right'" Ar'ata wasn't able to speak for a moment, she stuttered then: "Ye...Yes, I am, I am Ar'ata." "Okay Ar'ata, don't worry, if there is someone still alive, we'll rescue them, but in gods name, please tell me again what you have told Yareena...!" Ar'ata sighed, the same, over and over again...but could she do anything else' No, this was Te'ran, the Presidents husband and highest Admiral in their fleet. So she told him what happened in the service room, what Kai had told her. Te'ran nodded from time to time, his face got very grim when he listened to what Kai had told her. Ar'ata stopped. "What more'" Te'ran asked. "Nothing more, then I told the people to leave and told them to tell everyone they meet on the way out that there was a security problem and that they should stay away from the hangars. Then I informed Yareena, only minutes before the explosions started. That's all," she ended. "Well done, but I assume that we have to find Xev or Kai to know more about this case...if they are still alive." "I was just on the way to find exactly this out!" Ar'ata said. "Well, then let us waste no time, I see that you already have some paramedics with you, let's go!" Te'ran pointed into the passageway. "And for what are those guys'" Ar'ata asked and pointed at his six security guards. "Hopefully we won't need them, just in case, and of course to investigate what had happened in this hangar!" "Ah...!" Ar'ata nodded and started to walk.

One of the security officers always was some steps ahead to evaluate the risk, because the rift was really close to them know. When the pictures didn't lie, then it would cross the passageway several meters behind the entrance to hangar 645. Ar'ata looked up when the security guard came back and waved hectically. “There's someone in the passageway, the door to the service room of hangar 645 is slightly opened…” The crewmembers quickened their pace and moved around the corner. “That's Xev,….wow…!” Ar'ata nearly stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the glinting energy field only 20 meters away from the entrance. “This I call luck!” Te'ran was relieved when he saw Xev waving at them and run at her side.

Xev recognized Ar'ata and Te'ran at once: “You're late,” she smirked. “Better late than never…” Te'ran waved for the paramedic when he saw Xevs injury, but Xev shook her head: “No, Kai's inside…he needs more help than I, he's critically injured, please…!” The paramedic looked inquiring at Te'ran. The Admiral nodded and pointed to the door: “Alright, look after him first!” The paramedic followed the other security officers who already entered the service room together with the rest of the rescue team. “Is everyone okay on the station'” Xev asked. Ar'ata got very serious and answered. “No, we still don't know how many victims we have to mourn, but Yareena estimate them about six hundred till one thousand five hundred.” “That's horribly, I'm sorry for that…!” “It is horribly, but without your warning we're sure that there had been a lot more. We only had minutes, but every second counted, and it was enough to save more lives…” Ar'ata told her. Xev gulped: “Then you were twice lucky…only the half of the bombs exploded…!” Te'ran and Ar'ata got paler than pale. “What'” Xev nodded. “We stopped a possible second series after the first one was ignited. It was Kai's desert, he killed two of those Pr'karesh terrorists. The third one escaped, unfortunately, it seems that he had have time enough to get through the passageway before the rift emerged.” “Pr'karesh' Are you sure'” Te'ran asked with narrowed eyes. Xev nodded: “Kai is.” “And one of them escaped'” Another nod. “Yes, you know him, it's Sa'k…!” she said to Ar'ata. Ar'ata's eyes widened in disbelief…”Sa'k' Well that's a thing! My god, and this guy worked along with us on the Lexx…I can't get it!” Xev propped herself up when she heard Ar'ata mention the Lexx: “Please tell Stan what happened…maybe Sa'k wants to return to the Lexx, Kai is the opinion that he may had a plan to do so!” Xev wanted to get up, but her legs failed her. “Hey, slowly. It's better when the paramedics take care of you!" Xev lay back exhausted. "There's nothing you can do, Xev." Ar'ata said. "That's what I was afraid of...!" "I'll go and inform Dr. Shore', so he can inform Stanley." "Good idea, thank you Ar'ata!" Te'ran said and Ar'ata nodded, before she left she patted Xev's shoulder to lift her mood a bit. "Bye!" Xev said weak. She was really tired know. Te'ran looked inquiring at Xev: "Maybe you can tell me everything that happened...!" Te'ran said. Xev shrunk her shoulders. She knew that it could be important and she told him everything she knew. She left out the painful things that happened to Kai. It didn't seem important to her to describe the horrible fight between them. When she ended, Te'ran stayed silent for a moment. "I assume that Kai is right, they were Pr'karesh, and it's bad news that one of them could escape. I'm not sure what all this means, but it's shocking that the war has arrived here now." Te'ran waved at some new approaching paramedics. "They will take care about you, they'll transport you and Kai to Arcan's, the med-center is already alarmed and ready to take in victims. I'll inform Stanley as soon as possible where he can find you! And now...I have a date with two dead bodies...!" He said grimly and took a leave. Xev nodded thankfully and lay back. She was now really too tired to think about anything, the exhaustion demanded its price and she fell unconscious.

Te'ran entered the service hall where the security guards and some other paramedics were busy. He risked a short look over to Xev's friend. They had already prepared him for the transport, but on their faces he could read worry. , he thought. One of his team members appeared next to him and handed him a bag with a blood-covered knife. "Captain Feran is the opinion that this might be of some interest." "What's that'" Te'ran asked and took it. "It's the weapon one of the Pr'karesh was killed with, but in a discussion with the paramedics it's also the same weapon he was injured with." Feran's officer pointed back at Kai. “Feran told me to handle this weapon with caution.” “Ok, thank you..." Te'ran said with knitted brows and opened the bag, carefully he took the knife out and took a closer look. "Stop!" he called after Feran's officer. The man stopped. "He was injured with THIS'" The man nodded and looked inquiring at Te'ran. "Oh my...god," That was all what Te'ran brought out, he waved the guard away and started to walk over to the paramedics, which were about to leave. Te'ran stopped one of them and showed him the knife. "Is it true'" he asked. The paramedic nodded grimly. "Yes, he was pierced twice with it...we'll take him to Arcan's now, but a lot of time passed since it happened...!" He apologized and hurried after his team. Te'ran looked back at the knife with horror. Centuries had passed since he saw this kind of weapon for the first, and he had hoped for the last time. It became clear to him that he would never have the chance to ask the former owner where he had got it from.
But he knew that the only way to get such a thing was from the black market, there were still some crazy people who loved to own such a deadly thing. The question was of course how a Pr'karesh could own such a thing, because it originated from Arcan's. He remembered with a knot in his gut what he had learned about this weapon. Of course, this weapon wasn't an ordinary knife. It was called a Dro'-knife and was a very unique weapon used millennia ago as ceremony knife. Rumors told that they were leftovers from the insect wars and that it once had been part of an insect weapon. The purpose it was used for, admittedly wasn't something the Arcannea were very proud of: The Dro'-knives were used for the execution of criminals, mostly slayers. To fulfill the death sentence was one thing, to do it with this knife another. The sentenced wasn't killed by getting cut his throat with it, or stabbed, no, he simply got some cuts with it – this was enough. The blade was covered with a special coating, and this coating had a fatal effect to anyone’s organism. The toxin contained in this coating was set free when it came in contact with human blood. From there it spread all over the body, every cell was infected and caused a slow, painful death. The victim hadn't died because of the toxin, he had died by the result – unbearable agony. It often took them days or weeks to die. It was a cruel method of execution and 6000 years ago the Arcannea decided to abolish it. The reason had been an innocent sentenced man, whose innocence was proofed the second day of his execution. There wasn't an antidote to reverse the effect, because the scientists never had found one – there never was needed one. Maybe the rumors were right and it really had been part of an insect weapon, 'cause this would explain the inability to find an antidote. This tragic event finally was the reason for the abolishment.

The knives were destroyed, but of course, several of them vanished somewhere, there were enough sick people who collected such things.
Carefully he gave it to one of the waiting guards- before he cut himself by accident. Just as he was about to hope that they at least could cope with the injuries of their both guests, such an unexpected kind of catastrophe had to happen. There was no doubt that he had to contact Shereen as soon as possible. She had her own sorrows at the moment, but he knew how important the security of their guests was…after all they had discussed the evening and after all Kai, Xev and Stan had done for them, he really felt sorry that such a thing happened now. He felt even more bad when he thought that they had prevented another disaster for the Arcannea. He never had met people who had risked their own lives to help other people they only knew for a few days. Maybe because of the relationship of Kai's and their ancestors, or because he and his girlfriend were simply very brave people.
Te'ran sighed and walked to the exit, better no one crossed his way now. He told Captain Feran that they should take the dead Pr'karesh to the coroner and that he wanted to keep updated if any news emerged. Then he left for Yareenas bureau, he had to talk to his wife and he had to care about the unsolved Sa'k-problem.
Sa'k had used the chaos after the explosions to get back to the Lexx undiscovered. He took one of the many shuttles and flew back. It seemed to be his lucky day, because no one took notice when he entered the Lexx and he was able to hide somewhere deep inside the Lexx…waiting for his time to complete the task he was sent for.
Stanley and Shore' were clearly shocked when the Lexx informed them about the huge explosion and the technicians aboard wanted to go back immediately. But Stanley ordered the Lexx to fly a good distance away from the station, half an hour later the message from Ar'ata reached them.
“They did what'” Stanley asked perplexed. Ar'ata made a face and repeated the most important facts, including Sa'ks disappearance. “They must have got insane…risking their lives…” Stan muttered, “About this Sa'k, we'll keep our eyes open, so far no one noticed any approaching or landing shuttle the past minutes, well, to be honest, I'm sure no one really kept an eye on it, but I ordered the Lexx to keep a much bigger distance to the station, at least until the worst danger is over.” Stan explained. “That's a good idea. As soon as Te'ran or I know more about Kai's and Xev's condition we'll contact you. For the moment Yareena advised me to tell you to stay where you are…!” Stan listened attentively: “Gads, I really forgot her, is Yareena alright'” “She is, see you Stanley,” Ar'ata closed the channel and Stan sunk back to his command pedestal. Shore' moved next to him, he had heard most of the communication. He still was pale. “I think, we should be more than ever motivated to finish our research…we quickly need something to defeat those Pr'karesh, before they start to blow up everything around us.” Stan looked at him. “Yes, maybe you should…!” he said lost in thoughts. He was in worry about Kai and Xev. Ar'ata hadn't told him in detail what happened to them, she only had told him that they got injured whilst preventing a bigger catastrophe. Only the fact that they had succeeded in preventing the worst calmed him. He really wanted to know how they really are. Fortunately 790 wasn't around, he surely would have started to weep and howl about his precious Xev now and therefore getting on his nerves. “Lexx!” he called the big bugship. “Yes Stanley…!” “Please inform me when any shuttle appears and wants to enter…!” “Should I destroy it'” the Lexx asked back, a soft eagerness in his voice. Oh yes, the Lexx loved to blow up things. “Not this time. Just inform me, okay'” “Yes Stan.” “Thank you! This should protect us from any unwelcome guests,” he said to Shore'. “If this Sa'k isn't aboard yet! If he is that clever to fool us all, including blowing up the station in the middle of our own territory, we shouldn't rule that out, Captain!” Stan looked around a bit anxious. “Well, then I suggest no one of us should walk anywhere around alone and should keep his eyes peeled,” Stan said a bit uneasy. The thought of an invader left some discomfort in his guts. “Then we should return to our laboratory together, you shouldn't stay alone here on the bridge.” Stanley nodded and both men left the bridge.



Chapter 18

Bad news

The Lexx informed Stanley some time later that there was indeed a shuttle on its way to enter the Lexx, but soon it got clear that it was no threat. Yareena had sent a security team aboard to check the Lexx for a possible invader. This decision relieved Shore's team and Stanley, they hadn't expected that so soon. And in Stan's situation, it was the best thing that could happen. Since the news about Kai and Xev being injured in this attack reached him, he was at constant sorrow and he was relieved that he now had the opportunity to get down to the planet to look for them. Shore' agreed to go with him, cause his work was progressing very fast and he was sure that his team could act without him easily at the moment.

Some minutes later, Shore', Stan and 790 were on their way down to Arcan's with one of the moths. “It's all your fault, Tweedle, oh my poor Xev, my goddess…!” 790 wept. “Don't be silly, 790, is it my fault that her hormones aren’t under control and she decides to leave the ship to be alone with Kai' And let me say that additionally, tin can, if they hadn't left, much worse things would have happened!” Stan said angered. 790 stayed silent for a few seconds. “So she is a heroine, she has prevented worse things….oh my Xev….I will dedicate a new poem to you…at once….Xev, you heroine, savior of my life…of my love….!” “Oh shut up 790, no one is interested in it…!” Stan intermitted. “It is not meant for your deaf ears, meat bag…you're right!” 790 growled and changed into standby modus. “He's really enervating sometimes, isn't he'” Shore' commented unnecessarily. Stan only made a face.

The Med-Center on Arcan's was a real huge complex. Shore' explained Stanley that it consisted of hundreds of specialist departments and was able to take in nearly half a million people. Stanley couldn't imagine it before he saw it. When they piloted to the landing area (the Med-Center had its very own airport), he was really surprised about the huge main building and those other buildings attached to it. Not all were directly built next to it, there were smaller buildings far away from the main building, connected to each other with a fast train line, and the whole thing seem to range to the horizon. It was awesome. “Thousands of years of medical research brought together to an area that is a town of its own,” Shore' said with glinting eyes. “We're very proud of it.” Stanley nodded. “I think you can be…I've never seen something like that!” Shore' pointed to a special area on the airport: “ We have the permission to land there Stanley. Te'ran will pick us up and take us to your friends.” “Why isn't he on the station, I mean, after all this mess…!” “He's the commander of our fleet, not an investigator or responsible for security, that's Yareenas job. But he is concerned about your security, because you're the guests of our government. So he got involved in this and I'm sure there must be something important that he wants to tell us, otherwise he won't be there.” Shore' said.
And true, Te'ran waited in the greeting hall of the airport they entered after leaving their moth on the airfield. There was a lot of traffic, what really wasn't a surprise after the attack at the space station. Stanley had already seen many transports all around the Med-Center complex and here, inside the building, he could see victims and relatives taken in and hurrying to wherever the physicians and paramedics led them. Te'ran took them aside and led them to a small room where they were able to talk in private. “What happened'” Stanleys first question was when he saw the worried and not very happy expression on Te'rans face. “How are they'” Te'ran sighed. “Xev is fine, depending on the circumstances. The physicians have already dealt with her injury. She got a painful shot into her left leg. It was one of the regular energy weapons. Not a big thing. It'll take some time for her to walk properly again, but there won't be any complications. Those injuries are well known here.” Stan was relieved and 790's screens popped on again. “Ohhhh, my sweetheart will be alright. I knew it. Where's she' I want to see her!” demanded the robot head. “Later 790,” Stan growled. “You have to be patient. She is still sleeping, and this status won't change until tomorrow, sorry.” Te'ran added and looked back at Stan. There was one person left, and he waited for the inevitable question. “And Kai'” asked Stan. Te'ran pressed his lips together. “Better to sit down, Captain,” He offered a chair to Stanley. Shore' as well as Stan got a nuance paler. Stan sat down. It seemed that Shore' had been right as he referred to something important when Te'ran was here to meet with them. But he never thought that it might have something to do with his friends. “The situation for Kai is a lot more serious. He was injured with an ancient weapon during the fight on the station. A deadly ancient weapon called a Dro' knife.” Te'ran didn't hesitate to get to the point. It was senseless to retard the seriousness of the situation. Stan appalled. “This weapon is proscribed!” Shore' said hoarse. “What does that mean'” Stan asked confused. Te'ran sighed, it wasn't easy for him to talk about this barbaric weapon his people once had used for executions. But Stan deserved the truth and there was no reason why he shouldn't tell him. So he explained him what happened and what kind of a weapon the Dro'-knife was. Stan stayed silent for a long time. He was frightened to the core. He hadn't expected such a turnout. “How is he at the moment'” he finally had the courage to ask. “Not very good. The physicians try their best. Especially Dr Noraan, he's our best specialist in exceptional medical cases. But we all have to admit that there's not much hope that we're able to help him…or to cure him. As I told you, we never found any antidote for this poison. I'm very sorry that there are no better news, Stanley.” Te'ran said low. When he learned the kind of Kai's injury on the station, he had already been sure about the outcome. But the final prognosis here had despite been a shock. Dr Noraan had been very definitive about it. “Does Xev know about it'” Stan asked. Te'ran shook his head. “She's without conscious since she has left the station.” Stan sighed and looked down to the ground. The statement Te'ran made about Kai's situation sounded hopelessly definitive. He was sorry for that, very sorry. He started to like the former dead man more and more from day to day. Kai had grown a lot more accessible over the past months and this also had reduced Stan's former fear to zero. He always had been afraid of the deadly assassin, regardless if he was on their side…the deadly potential inside him was still there and he had felt it more than one time on his very own body.
But what would this mean to Xev' Stan buried his face in his hand. The beautiful love-slave was so completely in love with him, so happy now that Kai was able to feel, to share her love…and this should now be the end' He didn't know how to tell her, but he knew that he had no choice…no one else would do that. Poor Xev. Wasn't it enough that she had have an unlucky youth, for a long time had been in love without the hope to be loved back' And now everything that she had achieved by pure hope and will should fall apart again' Turn to dust' He felt like a henchman waiting to be taken to his victim. “Am I allowed to see her'” he asked with a heavy heart. “Of course. I'll take you there. If you need anything else, the nurses there will help you. I have explained them your situation and everything you request will be taken care about. Shore' and I will return to the station and continuing our work, including the search for Sa'k. It's the least we can do.” Stan nodded and the three men and 790 left the small room. They took him to another building with the fast train line and showed him Xev's current domicile. A small, but friendly room. The lights were shut down, so her sleep wasn't disturbed. Te'ran and Shore' said farewell to Stan and then he was alone with her and 790.
“Oh my Xev…!” 790 whined. Xev lay in a bed, her injured leg was put up a bit and thickly bandaged. She was indeed still sleeping and wasn't able to hear 790's cant. Stan silenced the head and put him down on the desk on the opposite of the bed and sat down on a chair. He watched Xev's sleep for a while and started again to ask himself how to tell her. Fortunately 790 kept his mouth shut and watched Xev in silence. Over all that thinking he finally got more and more tired and dozed off.

Xev still was somehow caught in the nightmare of her fight. She re-experienced the moment when Kai had saved her life again and again. How he had taken her to safety – although he was badly injured. She again experienced the bitter taste in her mouth when he finally broke down in her arms, barely able to stay conscious. She really needn't this kind of proof to be reminded that he truly was a mortal human being now – not any longer a kind of immortal machine. It was so unfair…
The sorrow and thoughts hunted her until she wakes. Somehow disorientated and dizzy she awoke in a foreign bed and room. Despite the diminished light, she recognized the sleeping red clad figure at the table. “Oh Xev, my heroine….she's wake!” she heard 790 cheering and noticed the robot head on the desk. “Hello 790,” she said smiling. Stan grunted and woke up too. “What…' Oh 790 shut up, you someday will surely kill my drumhead with your cant.” “Why not kill yourself…then you surely won't have any troubles anymore!” Xev shook her head. The both always remind her of two struggling spigots. “It's enough 790, Stan's right.” “But love-pumpkin…that's not fair…!” Xev rolled her eyes. Stan rose and shoved the chair next to her bed. “Off, 790, it's really enough!” “But…but, why don't you switch Tweedle off!” “790…I'm not in the mood to discuss with you…off!” 790 sniveled and his screens went black.
Stan pointed to her leg. “Seems that you're still whole, hm'” He said. “Think so, yes, ouch, that still HURTS!” Xev growled. She put her hand on her leg and stroke over the bandages. “What the heck happened on the station, Xev, we only saw the big POW, and then the complete chaos started. Te'ran told me that you were immense lucky that the part you have been in wasn't destroyed as well. If, it could have torn the complete station apart.” Xev sighed and explained: “Yes, you're right. When I left the hangar I saw the big rift that ran through the station right next to our position. It's not a calming sensation if you see that the only thing that separates you from space is a thin energy field.” Stan nodded. Xev stayed silent for a moment, then she told him how the whole thing started, all about Kais suspect, how they tracked Sa'k and revealed the Pr'karesh terrorists plans. “We fought those guys and somehow we prevented the worst…otherwise I won't be here now. That's the whole story, Stan.” Stan patted her hand to calm her, the whole re-telling had churned her up again and a long moment of silence arose. Stan didn't know how to start, how to tell her about Kai's situation. He knew that the question about him would emerge now…it was too obvious that Xev had avoided any clear description about their fight…she knew that he was injured. “Stan…,” Xev's voice broke through the silence and Stan looked up, avoided to look directly into her eyes. “Where's Kai' How's he'” she asked low. Stan's thoughts whirled…slowly and as if he wasn't himself he started to tell her everything Te'ran had told him only hours ago. He wasn't able to look into her face when he did so. Xev tried to stay composed, but her eyes gave her away too quickly. They were glinting with unshed tears and when Stan explained her how hopeless Te'ran had sounded, she started to cry. “No,” she said. “No—ohooo,” her tears flew freely over her cheek now. “Are you sure'” Stan nodded sad and put an arm around her shoulder, tried to comfort her. Xev's head sunk on his shoulder and she flogged a dead horse to get calm again. “I…I have to see him, please Stan, let us go to him,” she finally said. “But…your leg…!” Stan objected hesitating. “…doesn't matter at the moment,” she said bullheaded and sat up, pulled her bandaged leg out of the bed as well as her healthy one, ignoring the pain. Stan knew that it was senseless to argue with her and looked around for something that would help her to walk. He discovered a crook, leaning against the wall next to her bed and handed it to her. No one wasted any thought about the robot head on the desk, which still was shut off. “This should do, come on, I'll support you!” He helped Xev out of bed and she based herself on his arm when he led her out of the room and down the corridor. How Te'ran promised, the nurses were very willingly to help. When they were spotted in the corridor, one of the nurses asked at once where they want to go, especially when she recognized Xev's condition. Xev made a face and explained her hastily what they were up to. The nurse’s face went serious, she was well informed about the status of these people and their friends' situation. Without any further hesitation and word, she led them to another area of the building, which wasn't far away, but well-defined.
“This is our intensive care unit. After the incident on the space station it is a bit overcrowded, cause we have so many people with dangerous injuries…normally we take care that this area is as less crowded as possible and silent too, but I think in this actual situation it's senseless. When you enter, you'll see what I mean. Kai is in room no 8.” The nurse opened the door and let them enter.

The atmosphere behind the door was indeed strange. A lot of people were out on the corridor, as well as in the rooms. Some doors, leading to small rooms, were open and they were able to hear crying and words of comfort everywhere. Nurses took care of relatives, which were sitting desperate outside the rooms. Xev pressed her lips together and asked herself when she was going to join them.
In front of room no 8, they saw two people talking to each other. One of them was a physician, the other person was a nurse. The nurse agreed to something and walked away, a strange glance at them when she passed. As they reached the door, the doctor turned and looked inquiring at them. “Where do you want to go'” he asked. Xev pointed wordlessly at the door. “You're relatives'” he asked, slowly understanding. Te'ran had told him about the beautiful woman with a leg injury and another man in a red jumpsuit. Stan nodded. “Yes, you can call us …relatives…! I'm Stanley H. Tweedle.” “Xev Bellringer,” Xev added low. “Oh, I see. Te'ran told me about you. My name is Dr Noraan.” Xev pointed again to the door. “What's…what's with him'” she asked desperately. Te'ran offered her one of the chairs in front of the door and she grateful sat down on it, her eyes still fixed at the closed door. Noraan sighed. “We tried everything to isolate the poison in his body, but…. without success. It was already too late. The poison is now spreading from cell to cell and from there allover his body. It's an unstoppable process…much worse than any known disease. I guess Te'ran had told you about the purpose of this damn weapon he was injured with…Yes, he had.” Noraan nodded when he saw the sadness on both faces. “I'm very sorry that I don't have better news for you…our best physicians tried it.” He lowered his head, a bit ashamed. It was a bitter defeat. With all the modern medical knowledge they had…there still hasn't been any clue to find a working antidote for that poison. “That means'” Xev asked with wide opened eyes. “He will die,” Noraan said as softly as he could. He was used to such situations, they were always worse, he always tried to lock his own emotions away when he had to tell relatives the upcoming death of a loved one, but sometimes it didn't work at all. He sometimes really hated his job. Xev gulped and tried not to loose her composure. Stan put his hands on her shoulder and asked: “And there is really no possibility to change that fact'” Noraan shook his head slowly. “The poison on this weapon is absolutely lethal. Throughout the ages no one has ever discovered an antidote…the only thing we now can do, is to reduce the pain, which will spread through his body and increase over time. I'm really terribly sorry.” Xev lowered her head. There was only one thing she wanted now…to see Kai. In whatever condition he was in…she urgently needed to see her beloved. “Let me go, please, I want to be with him, now!” She rose from the seat and humbled to the door. Stan immediately wanted to support her. “Alone!” She said and looked pleading at Stan. “Okay…I…understand, I'll wait here then!” Stan said hesitating and withdrew his hands, stayed back. “Thank you,” whispered Xev and Noraan opened the door. “Please call me if you have need of me,” he said and left them alone right after. Xev nodded and entered the shaded room.



Chapter 19

A hopeless situation

Xev rested on her crook and waited until Stan had closed the door. Her eyes slowly got accustomed to the weak light in the room. Slowly she humbled to the bed she had spotted in the back. Several devices were put behind the bed and were diagnosing Kais condition. A weak, pale light above enlightened the area, at least she was able to see the shades of his body. Xev put the crook aside and clinged to the bed. With the other hand she felt her way up, reached his arm, his shoulder, then her fingers finally stroked softly over his cheek. She noticed immediately his increased temperature and felt the sweat on his skin.
“Kai'” she whispered and lit the light up a bit. Xev was shaken to the core when she saw her beloved lying in front of her. He was covered with a thin blanket, which was shoved down a bit. Xev couldn't see any sign of his injuries left, but…the worst impact wasn't visible. Softly she put the blanket back to its original position. “Oh, Kai…” she gulped hard when she looked up into his so clearly agonized face. Straws of his hair were glued to his sweaty face and she stroked them aside gently. After a moment she felt him stirring, and then he turned his head. Xev's hand rested on his cheek and he pressed it a bit more into her palm. He panted heavily. “Kai…,” Xev's eyes filled with tears, her heart nearly broke when she looked at him, when the thoughts came about what he had done… “Why'” She asked low and desperate. He sighed and opened his eyes to look at her. “I don't want…. you to…lie here,” he said troubled. “But…!” Xev objected. “Shsh…” Kai lifted his hand and put it over hers. “One time is…enough.” Xev lowered her gaze. She should have known that he had never forgotten the day when she had sacrificed her very own life to safe his dead existence. As much as he always had tried to let them think that he was a dead man with no motivation and obligation…he had never forgotten such things.
Kai closed his eyes for a brief moment, as a wave of pain flooded through his body. He bit his teeth together, didn't want to let Xev know how worse the pain already was. Xev sat down at the edge of his bed and laid her head on his shoulder. “The doctor said, that...that you…” her voice faded. “…will die'” he finished the sentence calm. Xev nodded – it was if her innermost would be torn apart any moment. “It is indeed a…strange irony, when you think about the purpose of this…weapon.” He whispered and put his arms around her. “I don't want you to die, Kai, that's not fair, you don't deserve that, “ Xev cried out, tears started to stream down her cheeks and Kai felt them dropping down on his skin. “Xev,” Kai put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her softly up, so he was able to look into her face. “I think this decision is beyond our power…life – and death - aren't always fair.” He stayed silent for a moment. The fact that he was confronted with his own death again, didn't disturb him much. The thought of dying wasn't alien to him, and if he was honest…he greeted it. Kai's doubts about the desert of this new life had always been far bigger than anything else. Alone the fact to get killed by such a weapon, once used to execute criminals, wasn't only an irony to him - it fortified his doubts. Xev of course would see that much different. “Fate holds a lot of irony, Xev. Maybe I am the worst criminal ever who is going to be killed with this weapon.” He said aloud. Xev looked horror-stricken at him. How for heavens sake could he think like that' She looked into his handsome face, currently marked with agony, an agony he hadn't expressed loudly yet. His eyes showed this heart-breaking mixture of pain and sadness and Xev started to sob: “I don't want to see you die, Kai, I'm almost sure that this couldn't be the reason…,” she cried. “We have had so less time together!” Kai sighed low. “Every single day with you was more I ever expected…I always knew that this won't last forever. Fate would never allow that. Nothing in life – or death, is left unatoned. So I'm more than grateful for the time, we had together, Xev, even if it was that short. You showed me what it meant to be alive again, you showed me how to love again…it is more I ever deserve…” Kai stopped talking, slowly he loosened his grip on her shoulders and closed his eyes. Xev supported herself quickly on the bed, prevented to fell down onto him. She shook her head when she heard him talking like that. Kai wasn't able to hold out much longer, the small and short effort to hold Xev up had caused immense exhaustion and pain. He felt a heavy wave of pain rolling through his body and lost his carefully upheld control. Kai groaned and his fingers clenched the blanket fiercely. Xev pulled him quickly into her arms and tried to give him at least a little bit of comfort to soothe the pain she really wasn't able to take away from him. The medical supply-unit did it several seconds later by increasing the amount of painkiller. Xev looked at the small device with the drug and asked herself how much longer this will diminish his pain. How long would this drug be effective' No one knew exactly how much pain a human being was able to bear before he dies…this was very varying. How long would it take until Kai dies from the unbearable pain when the drugs turn out to be useless' Was there really no way to spare him this' Was there really no way for an antidote' There had to be something…she didn't want to admit an end like that. Never. “I will find a way, Kai, I will try everything to find something that will heal you…!” Xev sounded very serious and certain, even if her voice was trembling. Kai had to smile a little when the pain faded. “You never give up, Xev, don't you'” Xev shook her head fiercely. “Had the hope that you got alive again been futile' Senseless' I doubt that. Everyone might have called me crazy, but I believed in it, and I was right. You're alive again. Why should I give up hope now'” She looked very upset at him. She couldn't understand Kai's disinterest in his soon ending life. She was sure that he never had expected to be alive again…but didn't he get accustomed to it in the end, hadn't he said that he enjoyed it to love again' And now there was this disinterest again, like in the beginning, when he did few to preserve this life.
Kai was sorry that Xev was that desperate. He knew exactly how she felt. And this hurt him much more than his own physical pain. His own life meant little to him, but he knew that this time his true death would leave a lot of pain and desperation behind. This was the only thing he really was sorry for – this, and to leave Xev behind like that. He was now so close to his biggest wish again: to die once and for all, to finally take the path into the DreamZone. The true death that was denied to him so long. It made him sad that Xev couldn't see it in this way. She always had cared so much about him, but never saw his need for deliverance in this kind. But he couldn't condemn her…the love she felt was simply too strong, too strong to give him up. He searched for some comforting words for his tortured beloved…he didn't find a way to express it in the sometimes real simple and rough standard language….
”Sait va ta ray, darunee!”
He lifted his hand and touched her tear stroked face. It was an eternity that he had used those words to anyone…and he was a bit surprised how fluently they still run over his lips and how they still were able to express what was in his heart. Xev looked astonished and inquiring at him. It was the very first time she heard him using his native language towards anyone. Although she didn't understand the meaning of the words, the wonderful sound of them touched her. It sounded important and honest. Sadness gripped her again when she realized that with his death this would also vanish forever…everything the BrunnenG once had been. “What…what does it mean'” she asked. Kai smiled bravely when a new wave of pain started to emerge from somewhere deep inside his body. He fought it back and answered: “It's difficult to translate…as the language of the BrunnenG is a bit more complicate than the standard language. But, I think I can express it like that…” he paused a moment, and stroked softly over her cheek again. “My heart will forever be yours, sweetheart.” Xev smiled and blushed. The sound of the words really hit the meaning. Kai looked into her eyes and both shared a long moment completely lost in each other’s eyes. The moment didn't take long…suddenly Xev noticed a change in Kai's expression.
His hand fell back and he closed his eyes when the pain he successfully had fought back before returned with tripled intensity. He felt himself losing the fight. “Xev…!” he whispered, her name not more than a weak breath. Xev touched his shoulders and bent over his body. “Kai' What is it' Please, say something…” She climbed onto the bed and stroke over his hot skin. He opened his eyes, looked more than desperate into her green eyes. Then Xev felt his body tensing under her fingers and the BrunnenG started to scream under the overwhelming intensity of agony. Xev pulled him completely into her arms and held his trembling body tight until the drugs arrested his agony. Xev wanted to scream as well. To see Kai in this condition was so cruel and bitter for her. Xev pressed his body close to hers and stroked and caressed him until she felt him relaxing and his breath getting calmer. She put him softly down and stroked some of the black straws out of his face…his chest raised and fell troubled. When he opened his tightly closed eyes again, tears ran down his cheek and he said hoarsely and nearly crying: “It hurt so much…!” Xev nestled closer to him, took his hand. “I won't admit an end like that, Kai, I swear that!” she said desperately. She knew that there was no possibility in sight how she was able to make her oath come true, but she was more than ever determined to find a way.
Kai didn't respond. If it gave Xev a little bit of hope, he didn't want to take this away from her. He didn't want her to break up upon his death. The life inside him, his vitality was something he owed her. There was more he wanted to say to her…but words would never be able to express what he felt. He had called her , the most tender and important word a BrunnenG would ever use for his beloved. He had once used it to only one other person in his life…a woman long gone and dead. He had sworn himself at these times that no one else would ever be called darunee besides her. But how little he knew at these times…! With the dead existence he had to go on with, it seemed that there truly would never be someone on his side again. But he was wrong. Even in death Xev loved him with a never understandable passion…a passion that, seen through her eyes, she thought will never be returned. Again something he was wrong with. They were indeed a strange couple – but something united them. They both were unique. He was the last of his people and she was the first and last love slave with Clusterlizard DNA. Both had met under the strangest circumstances one could ever imagine, and both had spent most of their life/existence alone. Both suffered in a kind of way of their never fulfilled wishes…until the day the unimaginable happened…the day he became alive again.
It was as if the accident that had put them together wasn't an accident at all. Maybe there was a reason he hadn't revealed yet. Or was it some kind of mercy that was granted to him' Or rather another kind of punishment…to let him crave for love and forgiveness…only to die again with the full capability to feel and the knowledge that these sweet moments will never return to him for what he had done in the service of the divine order' He didn't know…maybe he never would…
“I love you Kai!” Her voice rang through his train of thoughts and he felt a soft, electrifying sensation in his stomach when she kissed him. He responded with the little strength that was left to him and opened his eyes to look into her tear-blurred eyes. “Don't cry, Xev, please,” he whispered against her lips. “Don't let us waste the rest of the time that is left to me with crying and discussing about inevitable things…it's hard enough for both of us.” He said soft-spoken. Xev nodded slowly: “I know…I know…!” “That's much better…” he said, smiling slightly when she wiped the tears from her face. “I'm tired Xev, I think I try to get some sleep…I suggest that you do the same…!” Xev nodded and smiled tantalized: “I'm here if you need me, I don't leave you alone…!” “I know Xev…!” Kai closed his eyes and was asleep only few seconds later, the exhaustion had demanded its price. Xev covered him with the blanket and let him rest. She rose and humbled over to the couch she had spotted when she entered the room. Deep in thoughts she sat down, her eyes never leaving the sleeping figure of her beloved BrunnenG.
The next two days passed without anything remarkable. There were no good news on anything. Kai fought on against the increasing pain, Xev always on his side. Stan and 790 had returned to the Lexx after the security team had announced that no one else was aboard the Lexx. Sa'k stayed invisible, no one knew where he had vanished to. Shore's project had fortunately been unaffected by that and his team had been able to complete their research. They left the Lexx and returned to their own research facilities to put the won data into something they could use. So Stan was again nearly alone on board, Yareena had left a fistful of security guards aboard, but with Sa'k running around somewhere outside he considered the Lexx to be the safest place. Although he was happy that Xev had announced to visit him today.
Xev indeed wanted to visit the Lexx, in hope to find something aboard with what she may could help Kai. On Arcan's she only could be at Kai bed, and this of course wouldn't lead to any useful idea. Maybe there was something aboard she still hadn't thought of.
Kai hadn't been all to eager about her idea. He didn't comment her mission with a word, he just looked at her in his former impassive manner. In those moments she was close to burst with anger…the indifference about his soon ending life reminded her more to the dead Kai. She couldn't imagine that someone was happy about the idea to die! But sometimes it occurred to her, that a part of Kai was. She couldn't understand this. His whole behavior confused her a lot…why would he want to die' It was sometimes her inner voice that tried to give an answer: The fact that Kai was a 6000-year-old human being that never had had the chance to die his predetermined death. This now sounded reasonable enough to embrace the chance to die once and for all, but….no, she really couldn't imagine this. So she shoved those thoughts back and ignored them. Xev left the hospital, after asking Dr Noraan to inform her whenever there were signs of aggravation. Besides, she would be back the evening. Then she took the moth Stanley had sent her with one of the moth breeders.
Stan was really happy about her arrival and the change in companionship. “Ah, Xev, you know…” Stan started, when they walked through the corridor towards the bridge, “I really miss the old times, traveling aimlessly through space, 790 spitting his insults at me without a break…well, he still does it, think this isn't really a change, Kai…” Stan slowed down. “Everything is so different…like in a bad dream!” “Not every change was bad, Stan, but this dream has started far better than it is currently going to end,” Xev sighed and stopped walking and looked at the wall.
Stan was sorry for the girl. It had never been easy for him to accept that she really don't want any sexual relationship with him, he never understood her hots for the dead man, but after all they were some kind of family, and even he had been a real coward sometimes, he never could have done any wrongs to her, nor leave her somewhere behind, like he threatened to do several times. So he couldn't be jealous when Kai got his life back and Xev's biggest wish did finally come true. Instead he felt an honest happiness for her. Both had had a lot of unfulfilled desires in their life, and Stan would never forget how it felt like. For a short time it seemed as if their journey was about to end, their search for a new home and completion, but how sudden such things change he should have known. He was lucky that Yareena had survived the attack unharmed, but it made him feel sad when he learned that Kai now had the price to pay for that. He put his arm around Xev's shoulder and squeezed her gently. “Hey Xev…I…really don't know what to say, but…!” “It's alright, Stan, I know you care too, “ she started to sniff. “It's simply not fair….!” Tears blurred her sight and Stan tried his best to give her some comfort. “Cheer up, gal, maybe there's still some hope, I mean, maybe we have overseen something, a chance to help him,” Stan said. “Maybe we should consult 790'” Xev nodded: “That's why I came here, Stan. Do you help me'” “Of course, come on, let us ask this old tin can!” Xev smiled bravely and wiped her tears away and both continued their way to the bridge.



Chapter 20

Kidnapped!

He had cowered himself very very well. None of the search parties had found him. How should they' After all, his skills were superior and they only were normal human beings. He felt that his insect-DNA was very comfortable on board of this ship. And it was this part that felt sorry that such a mighty insect ship was ordered and used by humans…instead of using its own mind and will.
But well, at the moment it wasn't his concern, he had different orders and this orders regarded only the Captain of this vessel. He had to wait for a chance…a brief moment was enough to do what he had to do.
Sa'k looked down to the bridge. Except for the robothead no one had been here for a while. And he would be more than happy if this Tweedle showed up soon, preferably alone. Sa'k climbed down until he reached the floor of the bridge and released the safety of his weapon. He ensured that he was out of the robothead's sight, he had to mess with this troublemaker first.
He was about to approach him when he suddenly heard two voices inside the left passageway. Incredibly fast he disappeared inside the right passageway.
Just in time, 790 also noticed the voices and turned around with his cart to face the left passageway. He was very excited to hear Xev's voice: “Oh my Xev is back…my Xev with…this shlub Stan….grrrr!” “Be nice, 790,” Xev advised him. “Do I have to'” “Yes, you have to!” “Too bad…I just wanted to eat him for breakfast.” 790 gritted his digital teeth. “What a pity that you don't have teeth,” was Stans sarcastic answer. He was about to climb into the command pedestal when suddenly Sa'k appeared next to him and threatened him with his weapon. Xev was so surprised that she only stared at both for a few seconds, then she realized what happened and she wanted to intervene. “Stay where you are!” Sa'k hissed. “Or he is dead!” He dragged Stan down the pedestal. The Captain froze when he looked into the muzzle of Sa'ks gun. He gulped.
Xev put 790 down. “No darling, I will defend you!” “Be quiet 790!” Xev fixed the weapon, she really wasn't interested to get reacquainted with this weapon. Her leg still hurt when she thought about it. At least, she wouldn't underestimate it a second time. “Sa'k!” she said. “What do you want'” Xev tried to play out, she had to wait for an opportunity, but Sa'k didn't engage with it. “It's very unfortunate that the explosion hasn't killed you at once. You're only retarding your death.” A growl made its way up her throat. “Leave him alone, what do you want from him'” “He's part of my mission, and I am sure that he will be an important part in our plans. Go Captain! You're expected on Pr'karesh, someone wants to talk to you…!” Sa'k pushed Stan forward and Stan started to walk unwillingly and stiff. He didn't want to play a hero with a gun in his neck. “Tweedle, you coward, fight like a man!” 790 screamed. Xev hissed in anger. She saw no possibility to help Stan as long as Sa'k was ready to fire. “Call a security team 790!” She followed them in some distance to the mothchamber and with an angry growl she watched them boarding a moth. “We'll free you Stanley, I promise. Keep calm!” she called after them. “Oh Xev…you can talk,” Stan wailed and climbed into the moth. “We'll meet again…!” Sa'k said threatening. “You can count on that!” Xev called back and jumped towards the moth – but of course, it was too late. The small security team, that arrived this moment with a shuttle from outside stopped by Xev's yell: “Don't, Stan is aboard. Keep away!” Fortunately the pilot was prepared for such a situation, 790 had done a good job on that. The shuttle stayed away from the moth and let it pass. They land next to a very desperate Xev. Yareena jumped out of the shuttle and both women were looking after the disappearing moth. “We should send some of our ships out to follow him...so we don't loose his track, who knows where they gonna take him.” Xev looked at her and said: “Pr'karesh. It was Sa'k, he said that someone on Pr'karesh wants to talk to Stanley.” Yareena shook her head: “I don't understand, it's not usual that they kidnap someone…the reason why they suddenly do that is very fathomless.” “I don't have an idea either…” Xev sighed and watched the worry in Yareenas face. She was clearly upset and concerned about Stan. “At least he is alive, maybe this isn't a bad sign…!” “Why do you talk like that'” Xev asked. Yareena turned to walk back to the shuttle: “I haven't heard that someone ever reached Pr'karesh alive.” Before she entered the shuttle again, she said: “I'm going to report Shereen at once and we'll see what we can do for Stan.” Xev nodded absently and the shuttle lifted off again. There was nothing to do for them here.
The events on board the Lexx caused quite a stir. Stan's kidnapping was a real catastrophe for all of them. Without Stan they weren't able to control the Lexx, no way to communicate with the bugship…and the Lexx was more important than ever to them…in the worst case it should help to defend their home world. That was impossible now.
“This wasn't an act of coincidence. This was planned. That's the reason why Sa'k had been in Shore's team…to get aboard the Lexx, to learn about the ship and get a possibility to kidnap Stan. Without Stan we have one defense option less – the Lexx is useless without him.” Shereen knitted her brows by recapitulating the recent events. “The question that keeps me busy is, why haven't they killed him at once'” Yareena asked, she had met Shereen in her office right after her return from the Lexx. “Maybe it has something to do with the key Stanley possesses, they might know something about this key, Kai assumed that it's possible that someone is with the Pr'karesh who is also from the Cluster, the place they come from. But it was only a guess, it could be anyone else,” Shereen presumed. “So then, they seem to know not exactly everything, cause if, they would have killed him...to get the key,” Yareena sighed. She and the President were the only other people informed about the true function of the key. Yareena sat down onto a chair. “What should we do now' The situation here on the station is under control...but we cannot just wait for the next attack!” Shereen looked at her. “I know. Our situation is getting more and more out of control. And if the observation posts are right, then we'll soon have a huge problem. The Pr'karesh are concentrating their forces...and this leads to the assumption that they will start their major offensive we're expecting since months. No Yareena, it's not a coincidence. We are maybe now in charge of the technology to withstand their weapons, but it will take some time to prepare the necessary amount of ships to built a strong defensive line. Time we may not have. And now we've lost the Lexx too. I don't know what to do if the attack starts here and now...I've sent more spies to get more information, but I'm far from being sure that the information will reach us in time.” Shereen leaned back and laid her hand over her forehead. Their situation had gone worse, everything seemed to be against them. And she really was about to put the prophecy into question. The most important part of it lay dying in a hospital on Arcan's...but despite, she wasn't able to give up. There were billions of people she had to protect, and she had sworn to fight for them until the end...whatever would come. Fighting...Shereen sighed: “Sometimes I wish I were able to get out of here and do something on my own...just take a fighter and fight these bastards. But no, I have to sit here and make decisions...and have to read long lists of losses!” She lowered her head and rested it on her hands. Yareena put her hand forward and touched her gently, she knew oh so well, how she felt. She may was the security chief of the Arcannea Station, but until recently, it has been mostly an office job. Maybe the calm before the storm. “You're thinking of those old days, right'” She asked her friend. “Oh yes, those old times...!” Shereen smiled a bit and remembered. Before she overtook the presidency, she had spent a lot of her early work and time for the Alliance in education. It was important and necessary for everyone who was working for the government. A part of her education was also military training. She had been in a flying squadron, together with Yareena. The military part of their education was intended for emergency cases. But no one ever thought that this may come reality some day. Shereen stopped her train of thoughts suddenly. Something got into her mind. “Yareena...we may have a trump card no one has thought about so far. It's maybe the only one we have in this war. If everything fails, we should use this one last chance...it's the perfect instrument to fall into their back...!” Yareena stared at her for a brief moment before she got what she was talking about. “But wasn't this something our military strategists already have suggested' As far as I know is that they don't expect that Pr'karesh or any other of their main planets will be unprotected, and for that they disapproved this.” “Yeah, that's right. But this instrument isn't official military property, and we don't need military strategists to tell us what to do...I'm ready to do everything to protect the Alliance...and while our forces and theirs are busy why shouldn't we take the opportunity to slip in through the backdoor and take our chance' I'm almost sure that they take Stanley to Pr'karesh, and if we succeed to get to Pr'karesh we....” “...we can take the chance to free him and the Lexx is again a new option in this war.” Yareena ended her thoughts. Shereen nodded. “That's true, but who will go there'” “You, I, maybe we can ask Xev too. I fear that Kai is no option....” Shereens face went dark for a moment. “Don't forget, this is our last option, we're using it when it's foreseeable that we have nothing to lose.” Shereen bent forward and added: “Prepare everything and be sure that no one notice it, whatever happens, I want to make sure that this secret will stay a secret. I don't want any fighting with our military chain of command.” Yareena nodded and stood up. “I understand. I'll take care of it as soon as I'm back from a visit at the pathology.” Shereen raised her brows: “Pathology'” “Yes, the coroner, Tran'k, told me about some very strange discoveries when he examined the corpses of the terrorists. I drop you a message as soon as I learned something important.” Yareena explained. “Okay, do that. I'm out the office for several hours too. Dr. Shore' invited me and several senators to be present when he demonstrates the new technology for our ships. Usual governmental business.” “So he found a way to improve the protection of our ships'” Yareena asked. “Yes, call it the first good news. He informed me about that just before you came in. He sounded very excited. Well, it's too early to shout it out loud, so keep it to yourself, okay'” Yareena nodded and Shereen also stood up. “Let us go, think I need a cup of coffee before I meet him!” Yareena smiled and both women left the office.

Xev was nearly alone on the Lexx after Yareena and the security team had left. Dr. Shore's team was also leaving the Lexx, they had found what they were looking for and Xev was glad for them. Shore' had been so happy and he hurried everyone so he was able to test his theory with a prototype and a captured Pr'karesh ship. Xev left 790 on the bridge and wandered aimlessly through the corridors. Anytime she stood in her chamber and sat down on her bed. Her mind was still a chaos and no useful thought came to her. All the events had come thick and fast, first Kai's deadly injury and now Stan's kidnapping.
His life was clearly in danger, although he wasn't killed at once. She deeply hoped that it was his status as Captain that guaranteed his surviving. There was no way to follow Stan. She wanted to do that, but the moths haven't the range and the speed to fly past them. Sa'k will take him to Pr'karesh, but how should she follow him' Without the Lexx' She had to lean on the Arcannea, Yareena promised her to do everything they could do...and maybe then there will be an opportunity to help Stanley.
But this wasn't her only concern.
She was torn.
On the one hand she wanted to help Stan...but there was someone else who needed her help. She looked down onto the bed. Two lives she wanted to safe, one life belonged to a good friend, and the other life was that of the man she loved. Xev touched the blanket, which lay on the bed, still the same way it was left days ago. Xev pulled it towards her and pressed it tight to her body. She could still smell the aroma of their bodies on it. “Oh Kai...” she whispered. “If I only had an idea!” She banned Stanley from her thoughts for a moment. She wasn't able to solve both problems at once. She stood up brusque and walked out of her room. She had to clear her mind...with all the memories she was never able to get any useful idea!
Again she wandered aimlessly through the Lexx and then she stood in the cryochamber. Deep in thoughts she watched the cryopod he had used for such a long time. At least...they could freeze him until they find a way to help him. Sure, this really wasn't a solution, the chance to find a cure was more than small, depending on Dr. Noraan, they hadn't found one in the past millenia.
Xev's gaze wandered through the cryochamber, until it found the reservoir with protoblood.
She stopped. Since he was alive it was useless, but despite that she had kept it here, even if it
doesn't really make a sense. Xev made a step towards it and touched the tubes, played with them. “Could the protoblood be a cure'” she thought aloud. His undead, decarbonized body was never affected by any poison or injury. But only the protoblood kept him going, only the protoblood his damage. In fact it wasn't in it's purpose dissimiliar to human blood...but it was much more effective. She shivered when she thought about it's origin...the Gigashadow - an insect. In this part the insect-biology really seemed to be superior to the human biology. Strange enough. Xev shook off these thoughts, was she really reflecting on human and insect varieties' More important were those thoughts about a useful application of this protoblood. She hadn't a concrete idea, but maybe when she tells Noraan about its former usage, he may has one. And 790 has all the necessary informations about protoblood and the way Kai once had used it.
With a new ray of hope she took the protoblood and fetched 790 from the bridge. She had promised to be back by evening...and she wanted to keep that promise.



Chapter 21

The time is running

She met Noraan on the corridor outside Kai's room. Outright she started to tell him about the protoblood and her idea to use it as possible antidote. Noraan quickly lead her inside his workroom and closed the door. Patiently he listened to all her remarks. “I don't have any idea how to use it, but if there ever will be an antidote…it must be the protoblood,” she closed desperately.
Noraan nodded slowly and thought about all the things he had learned the past minutes. There were so many questions raised now, Xev gave him only a rough description of this strange substance and how it was used formerly. To use it as an antidote, they needed a copious knowledge about entirely everything. And there was the rub…he doubted that they would get in charge of a copious knowledge in time…

“Let's assume it is an adequate antidote… we knew almost nothing about this protoblood. We don't know anything about its composition, its possible applicability… what if his human organism doesn't tolerate the protoblood? You said that it came from the Gigashadow, an insect. You know that human and insect always have been enemies… and their physiology is completely different too, there?s no guarantee that they are compatible.” “Please… 790 here has every tiny bit of knowledge about the protoblood, about Kai's old condition…maybe it?s of some use. Please… I know it's only a slim hope, but can?'t we just try?” Noraan looked thoughtfully at her, he felt sorry for what had happened. She was about to lose someone who was her lover, they were about to lose someone who had saved many people with his brave attack against the terrorists. He still had his doubts, but he wasn't able to deny her request… she was right…if this robothead contained some more specific information they can at least try to do something…what do they have to loose?
“It will take time to analyze all the possibilities, time we and he may not have… I cannot promise anything, Xev, but we can at least take a try.” Relief washed over her face. She knew that she couldn't expect more…but if there was a chance, than the medic was the right one to find it. She pointed at the protoblood and put 790 down next to it on Noraans desk. “790?” “Yes my humble-bumble honey cake?” Xev rolled her eyes. “Please assist Dr. Noraan in every way he wishes, okay?” “Whatever you wish me to do, darling…I'll obey…!” 790 would obey…clearly, it was Xev's wish, and he couldn't deny her any wish…but he wasn't all too enthusiastic.
Noraan rose from his chair and looked at her completely serious: “I'll inform you if something results from our examinations.” “Okay, I'll be with him…,” she sighed and left a meditative Noraan back.
The physician knew that with this strange substance in front of him waited one of his biggest challenges… he could save a life, and he could find a working antidote to a poison hundreds of medics failed on before. He called his assistant, took the robot head and the bottle of protoblood and made his way down to the laboratories… as plenty of work needed to be done in a very short time, there was only one choice for him: he needed the best team of researchers and physicians in this hospital… a team he knew very well, because he was part of it. He trusted every one of them deeply… and he had this gut feeling that this topic should be in trustful hands only, whatever outcome it would have in the end.
Two more days passed by.
Kai's condition declined increasingly. His pain was already so strong that the painkillers were barely able to diminish it. Xev spent most of the time on his side, talked to him whenever he was wake. She refused to get some sleep, too precious were the moments with him, but after two sleepless days, she accepted Noraans offer to get some sleep in the small rest room. She was so tired that she slept away the complete next day.
In the middle of the day after, Noraan woke her and told her that he had some news. Still dozy she followed him to his workroom and sat down opposite him, silently asking herself if he ever sleeps.
“We worked around the clock the last three days and analyzed all the data we got from 790, and we already did some tests,” he started and Xev was suddenly wide-awake, she bent forward with interest. “The protoblood is indeed a very complex substance, something human blood and this insect variety have in common. It's not artificially reproducible, but that?s not of importance here. Our first tests were done with the pure poison Kai is infected with, and what should I say… the protoblood eliminated it with an incredible speed.” “And this means…?” Xev held her breath when she heard this news. “…that it could be an antidote, yes…!” Noraan hesitated before he put a damper down on this. “But?” Xev asked. “To eliminate the poison in Kai's organism we have to inject the protoblood as an antidote inside Kai?s blood circulation, so the antidote reaches every corner and is able to neutralize the poison. We took a blood probe from him and the tests confirmed what I feared from the start…the protoblood isn?t compatible with human blood. And this is unfortunately the only way to spread the antidote.”
Xev's hope fell apart. She knew that protoblood was able to revive the dead, not only Kai was a proof for that, the priests of His divine shadow were also revived with some protoblood to stop them. “And there's really no other possibility?” she asked desperately, tears sprang into her eyes and the picture of her dying beloved arose from somewhere deep inside. A picture forever burnt deep into her soul. Noraan looked sympathetically at her: “I doubt that it?s in his or your interest to let him die only to revive him the same way it once had been done.” Xev shook her head: “Of course not…” “Besides, we don't have the technology to do such horrific things.” Noraan was still shocked about the facts he had gathered from 790 about Kai's former undead existence. It troubled him deeply that it was possible to dead people with this substance. It was all against his ethical standards, he was a physician who wanted to save peoples life, not to change them into undead creatures, damned to wander a realm that lies beyond death and life.
“Don?t get me wrong on this Xev, but I'm glad that this is all that remains of the protoblood available in the universe…I'm scared what ideas would rose in some mental unhealthy peoples minds if they ever were able to lay their hands on this substance. We're a highly ethical society, but this doesn't mean that we don't have black sheep among us…” He paused some time and stared thoughtfully at Xev. The beautiful love slave was clearly close to break down. He needn't has to ask how much Kai meant to her…it was all too obvious. He sighed and avoided to let her wait any second longer for the second part of his news.
“Xev, what we're talking about now, is strictly confidential, this won't leave this room, it's for your ears, those of my team and the Presidents ears only!” He paused to see if this information reached her. Xev looked back at him, a bit surprised about this introduction.
“You already know that our ancestors, like Kai's too, have fought in the insect wars. It were the BrunnenG who found the key to beat them…by assimilating their technology and match them with ours. But no one ever thought about using insect substances as antidote or addition to change human biology. This is completely forbidden, a sacrilege. Even the insect side refused to do that. This His Divine Shadow only used dead humans for his experiments. So we're definitely in some sort of a dilemma, first: my colleagues and I are getting a headache by experimenting with an insect substance in combination with human biology, and second: no one ever had done something like this, no one knows what will happen.” Xev gulped. “So there is a possibility?” Noraan froze for a moment, then he rose from his seat and started to pace up and down slowly. “Yes, there might be a possibility Xev. Thanks to our advanced knowledge in every area of technology, medicine and biology…, which resulted from the strict laws we're bound to since thousands of years. Otherwise improvement overtakes rationality…and this is the road to hell. We've seen many nations coming and going, they all didn't listen to rationality. Well, to cut a long story short…if we're going to do what seem to be the only way to save his life…it has to be the first and the last time! That's the reason why I am so undecided…I hope you understand my doubt and the risks we're going to take!” Noraan sat back down and folded his hands.
Xev nodded slowly, her thoughts were whirling, but she slowly understood Noraans situation.
“It's complicate and it needs some time and diligence, but I think we're able to help. I try to explain it to you. You remember what I told you some minutes ago about the problem of the incompatibility of human and insect blood?” Xev nodded. “It's the only way to spread the protoblood as an antidote everywhere inside his body. As it is not possible in a natural way, we have to use an artificial way. We have to change the genetic structure, so both substances will combine. We cannot change the protobloods genetic structure, cause we know only little about it, and of course, we need it unchanged to get its full efficiency. We're to change Kai's DNA, that's the only way left. The use of gene technology is thousands of years old, also we use it in a very limited way. Our ships and many buildings are constructed with bioorganic technology, developed from gene technology. The restriction comes again in combination with human biology. We made some really bad experience with gene technology in the past, concerning the applicability on humans, and we learned from it. Today we are still using gene technology in medicine, but we have strict rules, there are enormous risks in using too much of a thing…you know? And what we're intending to do is a massive intervention in human biology. We have to modify his DNA in a way that his human physiology doesn't reject the insect substance. There were already done some tests, cause his DNA is slightly different to ours, but though we're all humans it isn't a great thing. By changing a specific part of his DNA, we succeeded in combining the protoblood-substance with the modified blood. It's a very complicated process, I won't bore you with details, but this is the only way we see.”

Xev understood most of it, but suddenly she was concerned too, mostly about the part with the change of his DNA. “And what will happen to him after this…modification' I mean, he is still human after that, isn't he?” Xev looked at Noraan with questioning eyes. She knew very well what a change of DNA could mean. The clusterlizard DNA she got during the transformation process proved itself sometimes very useful, but it changed her life in some unpleasant ways too. What would, what could happen if Kai's DNA was combined with the protoblood, which clearly carries insect-DNA?
Noraan nodded slowly, he understood Xev's concerns. “The change in his DNA is small. It's not necessary to pull it upside down, although he certainly will have some insect DNA in future – the functional group who allows us to combine his human blood with the insect protoblood. But of course he will still count as human. In the early days of gene technology there were cells used, donated by animals, and then implanted in human systems…it worked well without problems.
But of course, we're talking about insect DNA and that's a different story, this is still risky. Especially because we don't know what will happen to his physiology in general. You're an example of what might happen…your clusterlizard-DNA has changed some of your body functions. You're stronger, you can stand far more heat than normal human beings…this could also happen to Kai…. he may some attributes from the protoblood.” “What does that mean?” she asked, only calmed little.
Noraan scratched his chin and looked down on his data pad. “We're currently testing those attributes…and what we expect is a higher resistance against poisons and injuries. The regeneration rate of such a physiology is enormous…it's minimum 30 till 40 times higher than thus of a normal human. We think that it's the same effect the protoblood had had on his undead body…it right after it was injured. This doesn't sound bad…I agree on that, but I don't dismiss that there may also be harmful properties…after all it's still a risk, Xev…that must be clear!” Noraan looked over the data columns and was still astonished about this protoblood. There were really some test results, which implicated that a human body modified this way was possibly superior to normal human physiology. This was also the part that concerned him most. And what confirmed his will to keep this work strictly confidential. He mentioned it before, the Arcannea were very advanced, in technology and in morality, but you never know when the next black sheep shows up…this protoblood bore some dangerous possibilities, a range from giving dead people artificial life to modify people into superior beings. Without last nights never ending discussions about all pros and contras, and the knowledge that this was a very special case and the Presidents final okay, he hadn't agreed t do it. Noraan was the Alliances most brilliant geneticist… and with it came a lot of responsibility.
Xev listened carefully and realized the small gleam of hope for Kai coming with it. She knew about the risk, but what choice do they have? She doesn't want Kai to be dead, real dead, not now…this wasn't fair. She knew that Kai's opinion about that wasn't the same. He was suffering since he was alive again. But she wasn't ready to let him go this way…If he had the possibility to continue his life the way Noraan had described, she doesn't saw anything wrong in it. Above all, no one would turn him into an undead assassin again to lengthen his existence.
“I'll talk to him, in the end it's his own decision…as long he is able to make it on his own, I cannot speak for him,” she finally said, some fear rose from her guts. What if Kai refused to agree to it? What if he was so disgusted by the idea to live on with some insect DNA? After all he was a BrunnenG, and even in his undead state, she had clearly seen the disgust in his tone when he had talked about Mantrid and shown more than usual motivation to eliminate this artificial human-insect life. That his own existence was depending on protoblood made no difference, Kai was aware of that, but he never showed that he had cared about that. The dead had sometimes been really strange…Xev sighed, she wasn't sure how this would end, but she refused to give up. It was the only chance for him, and more than offering this chance wasn't possible. Xev rose from her seat and sighed. With all her strength she grasped at this straw. “My team has already prepared everything for an emergency case, just tell me as soon as you know…!” he smiled encouragingly at her. “Thank you, I…”
Just in this moment the door was opened fiercely and a nurse hurried inside. She interrupted their conversation and talked to Dr. Noraan. “Dr., our patient from room #11…” Xev looked up startled, room #11 was Kai's room.
“The effectiveness of the painkillers has reached its limit, we don't have any stronger sedatives,” the nurse continued in Arcannea, so that Xev couldn't understand. Noraans face darkened and he followed her outside. “What's going on?” Xev asked with sudden fear in her heart. “Please wait a moment, I'm back in a minute.” Then he was gone.
Xev's thoughts started whirling and she felt her fear growing. Something was clearly wrong. Minutes seem to turn to hours, and she was right about to follow Noraan, when he finally came back. He leaned heavy on the silently closed door and looked at her with a sad and serious expression. “What happened?” Xev asked hoarse and full of apprehension. “He's dying,” was the short reply. Although she had nearly expected this…she winced and felt a deep painful stitch in her guts. Only with extreme effort she was able to control herself. “I'm sorry, but the effectiveness of our strongest painkillers and sedatives is now completely useless. There's nothing we can do for him any longer…!” “How long?” she asked, her gaze dropping to the floor. “Half a day perhaps, maybe less. There's only few time, Xev,” he reminded her. Xev nodded. “He asked for you…” Noraan opened the door again to let her out. He didn't follow her, he felt that she wanted to be alone now. “I'm here if you need any help,” he said. A brief nod, then Xev turned and walked over to room #11. She took a deep breath before she entered. She rather wanted to face up to her own death than her beloveds one.

As she closed the door behind her, she heard his suppressed groans and quickly moved at his side. The sallow light seemed to make him paler than he already was. His hands were baled to fists and his body trembled. “I'm here, Kai!” she said low. She gulped, a thick lump in her throat. His view was heartbreaking. He turned his head and opened his tensely closed eyes when he heard her voice. His attempt to smile ended up in a painful groan. His hand trembled when he put it slowly forward. Xev took it and sat down on the bed. She appalled in how breakable his hand felt in hers. It wasn't the only sign of the consequences the injury has left. Kai had grown painfully thin during the last days and he acted on so devitalized. Troubled Kai tried to sit up, what was impossible without her help. “It's so…cold, darunee…” he said weak and low and sank into her arms. Xev pulled him closer and put the blanket back over his body. She run her hand softly over his cheek and swept some damp and wet strands of the deep black hair out of his face. He felt terribly hot and Xev could see the fever burning in his eyes. A last rear up of his body against the poison. He laid his head enfeebled on her shoulder and sighed low.
Xev's eyes burnt of unshed tears, she had to try hard to keep her control. Without speaking she listened to his unsteady breathing, felt his painful thin body trembling. He buried his face down onto her shoulder and gave a low groan from time to time, which often lapsed into a sob. Xev lost the fight with her control and the tears flew freely over her cheeks, seeped into his raven dark hair. “Xev…I…love…you,” Kai's voice sounded brittle. “You cannot die Kai…not yet!” she whispered and caressed his hair. A sigh was audible and he lifted his head: “I've already existed for a long time, Xev, too long…” “No, the time you were alive was far too…short,” she said desperately. “It's the price of mortality, it's what would have happened sooner or later. I'm not invulnerable any more…and I am not able to…protect you any lon-….” Again he pressed his face against her body and muffled his outcry, resulted from the agony he was suffering. “Are you sorry…for getting your life back?” she asked sadly. Slower than before he lifted his head and let his gaze wander over her beautiful face. After a brief moment he dropped his gaze. “I…don't know…but what I'm sorry for is that I won't be there for you soon…” his voice faded. If he had been dead on the station, than he had been able to safe her life without any consequences for him, and he would still be there to protect her.
But then…he would never have learned all the things before it. All those moments with her…the emotions associated with it, the love they had shared. From this point of view he wasn't sorry for anything…but, there were enough moments he felt sorry to be alive again.
Xev didn't respond, what should she say? More and more it became clear to her that Kai had already abandoned all hope…she couldn't blame him. The pain he was going through would end with his certain death, there was no escape – that was what he knew. She knew it better, and she was reminded to it this moment…it was about time to tell him… “Kai, I talked to Noraan. There might be a way to save your life…it's very complicate and difficult, there's a high risk too, but at least it's a chance.” Kai looked into her face when he heard it, but Xev couldn't see any hope in his eyes whether this news, there was only agony and sadness. “There's a…possibility?” he asked. “Yes, one…,” again this hesitating and careful undertone. Kai coughed and shook his head slightly, it irritated him that she started to tell him so late…normally Xev had come in and burst it out aloud, so there must be a catch in it. “I…I told Noraan that I have to ask you first, I have no right to come to a decision as long as you're able to do it on your own…because…well, it might be not in terms of…your opinion.” Kai watched her carefully…there was a catch in it. Xev began to tell him about her idea and what she discussed with Noraan, what he found out, every tiny bit she knew about Noraans suggestion. During the explanation she tried to put all her hope and confidence in her voice to convince him that it really was worth a try. Kai listened to her nearly motionless, he had closed his eyes, his head rested on her shoulder. Xev waited for an answer, but there was none. She almost thought that he had lost his consciousness. “Kai?” she asked worried. Slowly Kai raised his head, then he opened his eyes to look at her. “Is it really something you would recommend?” he asked, some tears sprang in his eyes.
Xev was expecting something like this. But despite her shock of Kai's very emotional reaction, her desperation prevailed over her rationality. “You have a chance to live on…Kai.” The BrunnenG sighed. He was deeply disappointed that Xev really considered this procedure to keep him alive. Hadn't he gone through enough changes? Hadn't they mutilated his body enough in the past? He knew that she was in great pain about his threatening death, but this was too much. With sudden strength he sat up and grasped her shoulders. He looked sad and disappointed into her eyes: “Xev, are you serious about that? Do you really want my life to be continued at all costs? I may not be a machine without emotions, without life, but should I turn into a different variation from what I once was? A living creature with protoblood instead of an undead one? Should I carry the DNA of the worst enemy of all humans? An enemy that also destroyed my people, my home? Xev, I hope this is only a bad joke. You know me better than anyone else in this universe, you know my story, at least from you I would have expected something different…!” Xev swallowed hard. She never had seen Kai so upset. Her brain, her rationality told her that every single point he quoted, he was right with. But her heart spoke a different language. This heart was afraid of losing him, of breaking when he dies. “I know…but…but….” Xev started to sob. Despite his weakness he strengthened his grasp. “I would rather die than to allow such things done to me again, as long as I am able to prevent it. You cannot be so egoistic Xev…I know that you aren't!” Xev bit on her lips. She wasn't an egoist…but she couldn't live without him anymore…not after all they shared…not after all the love she had found with him. All her life she had been alone…this wasn't the worst, she was used to it, but now she knew how it felt to be respected, accepted and loved. Everything inside her fought against a new rejection, and caused this trouble inside her mind, because the other part also understood Kai's position.
She felt his fingers under her chin and her head was pushed up with soft pressure. Kai realized her inner fight and was a bit sorry for his harsh words, but it wasn't easy to speak rationally to her at the moment. “Don't do that to me Xev!” He looked deep into her eyes. He could see and feel her agony, her fear, her love, her firm will to safe his life, the fight between her rationality and her heart.
Like so many times her heart won again, this irrational little thing that prevented to let her recognize the point of let go. She caused him pain with that, not willingly, but nevertheless she did. He didn't want a life at all costs. He didn't want his existence artificially lengthened…not again. Although Xev knew much about what was going on inside him, more than anyone else at least, she seemed to be not interested that his physical and mental pain have reached a point where he only wanted one thing: to die. Every day since this second life began, had been a fight, a struggle against his past, his memories, his newly awakened emotions he sometimes was overstrained with. And now…there was this fight against this physical agony that spread like fire through his whole body.
Xev could give him the strength to keep an uncertain mental balance, but she couldn't take away this additional pain. It was all too much… and he was so tired. Feeling his strength fading, he tried it a last time. “Xev…,” Kai felt tears streaming down his cheek, but he didn't care. “Please Xev, let me go. My life, my existence is long since a fight…I'm so tired. If you really love me Xev… I beg you…let me go,” he said, his voice failing. He felt the strength, which had kept him upright, collapsing. The pain came back with tripled intensity. The agony washed over him and he broke down with a scream. Xev caught him and held his trembling body. Softly she cradled him in her arms and started to cry. “Kai!”
It shocked her that Kai had to beg under tears…what had she done? Had she been so wrong about this whole idea? She was desperate, but she hadn't realized that her desperation could grow so much that she wouldn't respect other people’s needs and wishes. Inwardly she cursed herself… love could be so cruel. “Kai…,” she pressed his body close to hers and said sobbing: “I'm sorry…but what should we all do without you? Stan was kidnapped, the Arcannea are going to lose this war… what should I do without you? I love you… I… I… Kai… I cannot go on without you…!” Xev felt his body convulsing with pain in her arms and with a terrible scream he threw his head back, his face a mask of agony.
The wave of pain that seized him was like fire and there was nothing that would stop it now. Groaning he searched for Xevs hand, he still could feel her vaguely next to him, but his consciousness was about to fade into darkness. “Xev…,” he whispered scarcely audible when the next wave set his body on fire. He started to scream and sob until he finally was thrown into the waiting darkness.
Xev had taken his hand and held him firm in her arms, his whole body trembling and convulsing with unspeakable pain. It took minutes until she felt him sinking down, then he just lay in her arms, perfectly still and without consciousness. She let him slid down onto the bed and Xev touched his face with trembling fingers…softly she stroke over his keen features, then she broke down onto him. She started to cry the bitterest tears in her whole life. She was so desperate…what now? What would happen now?
Stan kidnapped, Kai close to death, not accepting the suggested way to safe his life… what should she do? She knew somehow that it was important to continue, to safe his life…but who should convince him when she fails? For the first time the tough woman inside her broke down…she was beaten… she didn?t know what to do.
Xev's heart was about to break when she lifted her head to take a look at his motionless body. She put her arm under his back and pulled him back into her arms. She pressed him close to her body and under more and more tears a desperate and sad clusterlizard scream escaped her lips.

Chapter 22

Stanleys nightmare

If Shereen hadn't been the President of the Arcannea Alliance and in the middle of a meeting with her council, she would have screamed in rage at the very same time like Xev cried of sadness.
After they witnessed the successful demonstration of the prototype ship with the modified protecting system it seemed to turn out a good day. And now the engineers and workers were hard working to equip all their ships the same way. Shore' and his team had done a great job during the last days.
Another quite good information she got was that there was a first sign that Stanley was alive. How anticipated, the kidnapped Captain had been taken to Pr'karesh...not so good news, but he was alive, that was all that counted at the moment.
But all things have turned sour now…
She stared in shock on the data pad Al'a had handed her over a few minutes ago. Not only the fact that Dr Noraan had dropped her a few lines about Kai's current condition, which was truly sad, distracted her from Senator Farkaths speech, but the next message shocked her completely. She stared down on the words for quite a while...
The day she most feared had come...the Pr'karesh had started their attack on the Jahr'am-front line. The long awaited war had begun...

No wonder that at least one man in the DarkZone was in a good mood this day. Biovezir Taleron. His best assassin was also the most reliable man he had, and after the failure to destroy the complete Arcannea-Station, he had at least used the chaotic situation to complete the second mission...to kidnap the Captain of the Lexx. Now he was waiting impatiently for their arrival here. He was more than excited to get finally answers to all those questions the presence of the Lexx here has raised.
Stanley felt contrary to Talerons excitement. He felt below par when Sa'k dragged him into the dark and uncomfortable place once called . The atmosphere here sent a shiver down his spine, it reminded him a bit too much to the Cluster. Stan was suddenly reminded to the conversation they had on Sha'ra with Shereen. Kai had vocalized what they all avoided to assume…was there someone who had escaped from the Cluster, like they had? And was he responsible for all the chaos? With all the luck they always had…it was in all probability. Well, he was supposed to find it out as first, the question was if it was of any use for him after that…
Sa'k shoved him roughly into the building, through numerous corridors, which were only lit weakly and passed some hurried walking people. Stan wasn't able to tell if they were here on their own, or if they were happy to work here, their expressions were all to blank and didn’t give anything away. The sensation of this emotional emptiness and depressing constriction of the Cluster hit him again.
Finally they reached a door to another room. Sa'k left him in the care of two disinterested staring guards, which were waiting in front of the door. Stan didn't move…he was sure that those guys won't be so disinterested if he would start an attempt to escape.
A few minutes later the door opened again and Sa'k pushed him wordlessly inside. Stan nearly fell to the floor but in the very last second he kept his balance. He was standing in the middle of a large hall, and he saw a person waiting for him in the penumbra of the back.

The biovezir watched the arrival of the Captain with excitement. But what he saw wasn't what he had expected. He surveyed the nervous Stanley up and down. “A security guard class 4…?” Taleron snorted disappointed. He had expected a vociferous protesting member of the Divine Order…but not a security guard…fourth class! Stan froze when he heard Talerons words and tried to identify the person in the penumbra. He slowly recovered and answered, pushing his chin defiant forward: “Seems that I'm not the only one that came here from the LightZone.” “Yes…that's a surprise, for both of us!” Taleron crossed the distance between them and stopped right in front of Stan. The Captain of the Lexx blinked when he noticed Talerons appearance. Who the heck was this man? There was nothing special on him…he wore dark clothes, maybe a bit like the divine order, but besides his face, nothing on him was unusual. Stan trembled a bit when he looked inside this cold and cruel face of Taleron. The eyes were constantly watching him like a hawk, and his gauntly features underlined his atrocious appearance.

“Who are you?” Stan asked. Taleron laughed. “Maybe your worst nightmare Stanley H. Tweedle…maybe…well, let's see…!” Stan backed away a bit when Taleron encircled him. Then he whispered: “I'm Taleron, once His Divine Shadows weapon constructor, a biovezir…if you like to call me that…!” Stan winced…< Jesus…not again>…he thought… “But now tell me, how is it that a security guard class 4, and former arch traitor, is in charge of the mightiest weapon in the two universes?” “How is it possible that 4000 years after the destruction of the LightZone someone from there is still alive?” Stan asked back, ignoring the ongoing reminder of being an arch traitor. Did everyone in the LightZone know what he had done?
Talerons eyes narrowed. He couldn't quite believe what the man said. The LightZone destroyed? How was that possible? On the other hand…this could be the explanation why this ship wasn't commanded by His Shadow himself…had he been killed in the LightZone? But why does the Lexx still exist? Taleron needed answers…quickly. “You don't seem to get it straight… Captain…” Taleron made a quick step forward and grabbed Stan's neck roughly, “…who's in charge to pose the questions…!” he hissed. Stan gulped and tried to keep some countenance. Taleron waved Sa'k and the eerie man handed him a syringe. Taleron dragged Stan with him and pressed him into a chair in the back of the hall, Sa'k held him with iron fists and tied him up. “Let us start again, security guard class 4…I'm not interested in counter questions and fairy-tales.”
Stan peered in panic at the syringe in Talerons hands. The things were hurrying a bit now…what happened here? Fairy-tales? Didn't this crazy biovezir know anything about what happened to the LightZone? He couldn't detect anything in Talerons cold face, but this reaction betrayed him. “You didn't even know that the LightZone was destroyed?” Stan asked, a bit too triumphantly. Taleron grabbed his chin with bone breaking strength. “No…but I know that you will tell me…without any delay and without any lies.” The syringe drew closer. Before Taleron penetrated Stans arm with it, he hissed: “I'm pretty sure that we are going to have a wonderful conversation…!” Then the syringe pierced through Stan’s skin and the drug was injected into his veins. Stan wailed low, but it was too late. The truth serum spread rapidly and he froze…his gaze was concentrated on a point far away and Taleron smiled cruelly. He bowed down to ask his questions…

He didn't know how much time had passed, but his head felt like a hammer was constantly banging on ambos when he woke. Stan moaned and he put his hand on his forehead. What the heck had happened? Slowly he remembered. The kidnapping. Pr'karesh. Biovezir Taleron. Truth serum. Startled Stan sat up and opened his eyes. He was in a small room, obviously a cell. He had lain on a small bare pallet, made of some plastic, the cell itself was depressing grey and cold. Stan sighed and put his head in his hands. What had Taleron asked him? What had he told him? He couldn't remember anything. It was terrible, well…at least he was alive. But what meaning does it have? Was he still of use? Did the same happen to him again like on the Cluster? Will they keep him in here until the system forgot him again? Stan suddenly felt terribly forlorn…

Taleron watched the screen showing Stan’s cell in the centralized control room. He grimaced.
What he had learned was close to impossibility. Hadn't he used the serum, he never had believed it.
The LightZone destroyed – by Mantrid, who always had a liability to megalomania.
His Divine Shadow - also killed – and this three had played an important part in it.
He nearly started to laugh when he learned that the prophecy His Shadow had feared and always tried to prevent, had been nevertheless accomplished through the one he had controlled for 2000 years. Talerons brows furrowed when he thought back to this part of Stan's inquiry.
This assassin had caught his full attention. Not only for he had killed His Shadow…no, because it was the same one that His Shadow had sent after him when he had to flee from the Cluster, some years before they stole the Lexx.

Kai – last of the BrunnenG, and also the darkest legend among all assassins in the service of His Divine Shadow. He never had have much to do with the Divine Assassins, except for their weapon equipment, and this should have been the only time he had to see Kai…asleep of course, not wake. But their way crossed – not that he wanted that, but he had no choice…His Shadow wasn't a ruler you should annoy.
Thanks to his knowledge he had been able to escape, but this assassin was despite better than all the others His Shadow had sent after him. Too bad that with Kai's sudden and unexpected re-incarnation he would never have the chance to meet him a second time…he already had crossed Sa'ks way. He had to admit that his insect side was a bit disappointed about that…what a satisfaction the death of the last of the BrunnenG by his own hands would have been! But this chance was over…he didn't expect that Kai would survive Sa'ks lethal attack. Insect weapons were definitely deadly for every human.
Taleron smiled sarcastically, what a lucky coincidence…he knew that the undead assassin Kai would have been not so sneezed at…but without the Lexx and without an assassin like Kai…they only were flies he intended to slay with a swatter.
If everything would continue so satisfying, he'll soon have all power over the DarkZone. Additionally to his finalized research for the perfect human-insect-hybrid race, his ships were successfully attacking the Arcannean frontlines and their advance had unstoppable begun.
Taleron put his gaze back on the screen to Stan's cell. What about him? Well, he was still important for him. He was the one with the key to the Lexx, an instrument of power he soon wanted to use… and once he had complete control over its Captain, he would have control over the two universes mightiest weapon. For the moment it was enough that the ship was completely useless for the Arcannea. All in good time…first he had to care about other things…but his full attention would be back at Stan soon.

Stanley looked around in his prison cell. Deflated he saw that there was not the tiniest chance to escape. Stan sighed and sat back down on the prattle. he heard Xev's words ringing through his mind. Well, he hoped that they would. Who knows what Taleron wanted to do with him…At least he hadn't found out about the transferability of the key, otherwise he doubted that he had still been here. So his life was worth something. But now what? He wasn't sure about what he had told Taleron and what he now was planning…but, what does it matter? He couldn't tell anyone.
It was so frustrating to sit around, not able to move something. Not knowing if someone would come for him…what if no one would? With horror he remembered what had happened to Kai. Xev promised to free him, yes, she would…if she could. Kai…the thought that he may was already dead scared him. Not only because he knew that this was one moving spirit less to free him, also, he really was sad about this sudden end of his new life. When he was still dead, he often wasn't sure how to think about him, there were moments where Kai had scared him to death, but also moments where he had protected them again and again from any harm. He was family, although he was dead. But since he got his life back…there started to grow a real friendship. It was a complete new aspect to him: the ability that the BrunnenG was able to show more than reflectivity…there were real emotions instead! He shook his head, no, he couldn't imagine that the BrunnenG maybe wasn't alive this very moment. “Oh boy,” he muttered. This time all three were really deep in trouble…thanks to the circumstances they were thrown in. And there seemed to be no solution that their problems would end soon. Stan leaned back at the cold wall and closed his eyes. “Oh boy…!”

Chapter 23

The best friend and the worst enemy

Kai wasn't able to feel any physical or mental pain anymore, somehow his consciousness seemed to be disconnected from his dying body. He remembered…the sensation wasn't unfamiliar to him, even he had experienced it only for the blink of an eye when he had died the first time. This moment hadn't lasted very long, because in the very moment he had died, a part of the most important thing that would had allowed him to die truly and forever, had been stolen with brutal violence.
It had been a part of his soul.
His life-essence had been torn apart this moment. A small part of it had remained in His Divine Shadows sways when he had stolen his memories, his personality; the other part had fled into some sort of a nimbus. Maybe he had seen this nimbus not long ago:
The planet Water.
It was some sort of afterlife…and yet not. He had seen all those souls down there, he had seen his own, but he hadn't seen any other BrunnenG. It was only a rough assumption, but a possible one.
And there it waited…2000 years…6000 years.
The regaining of his memories from the predecessor, who had killed him, hadn't made any difference to his torn soul. As long as his body stayed dead, it was impossible for him to complete his journey…he needed his whole life essence back, not only the small part he had gained back with his memories. Even in this unworthy state he had been aware about the connection between both parts…it was the only true motivation he was able to “feel” – to get those both parts together again…meaning to die once and for all.
Well, the things had turned out differently, his soul was finally freed and able to return to him completely…when he became alive again.
It wasn't the possibility he had expected, and not the one he would have chosen, but it happened…and it was a strange experience. Nothing he wanted to go through again…it was also another reason for his inner torment. Now he was again on the edge of death…for the first time he was about to enter the realm of the dead with his whole intact soul, so he didn't exactly know what awaited him, although he had experienced much more between life and death than anyone before.

His consciousness “woke” in a strange place. He found himself standing in the middle of an endless plain, or was it an image of him standing there? No, it was him, there was no difference between this appearance and his usual appearance…besides, it didn't feel real, there was nothing but silence here, no wind blew, no birds sang, no animals were seen…but what was reality anyhow?
He surveyed the bright plain, discovered mountains somewhere far in the distance, over him was a deep blue sky, fading into violet and red shimmering colors where the semicircle of the sinking sun was just visible behind those mountains.
He turned to see what's behind him and froze in place. In the opposite direction, there was darkness, only a full moon in the dark sky that lit up the plain a bit. He furrowed his brows and looked up irritated into the sky. Day and night in one place? This whole thing didn't seem to make sense to him. His gaze dropped to the ground and he saw the borderline between day and night directly under his feet.
“Am I dead?” He finally asked into the silence.
“That's what you want to be, right?” a voice behind him asked back. Kai turned back to the dayside and found himself face to face with a person he already knew.
It was the prophetess – and a part of him wasn't surprised to see her again.
Kai hesitated to agree, but he could see that she already had determined how he felt about it. “You're not dead, Kai, not yet. This is a place where decisions have to be settled – into the one or the other direction…maybe you know this place, but I doubt that you remember.” Kai examined her and the landscape around him. This place had indeed something familiar, but he couldn't grab it…maybe she was right, and he only failed to remember. His gaze shifted back to her and he tried to understand the purpose of his presence here.
“If I'm dying…why have I to be here – it's not the same like the first time,” he said with narrowed eyes. The prophetess smiled a little. “That's true…but like I said…this is also a place of decisions…you haven't decided to walk the one or the other path yet.” She pointed at the night-, then to the dayside.
“I haven't decided? I thought I am dying…!”
If it really wasn't like the first time…there was no need for him to wait…or to decide…if that's what this place was for.
“That depends,” she answered. “On what?” he demanded to know. The strange woman touched his shoulder. “On the decision you're making. You're not longer a prisoner of this place…you have the right to choose, like every single living human being.”
Kai was irritated…and skeptic. She was speaking in riddles…how now?
He tried to reinterpret this place with what he had heard.
This was clearly a place between life and death, a place where some people succeed to return to life…and obviously some not. It could also be a place where some have to wait…maybe that's what she referred to when she told him that he already knew this place but wasn't able to remember properly.
But does it all depend on individual choice or…? He watched the prophetess carefully. There was something he couldn't determine, but he was nearly sure that she hadn't told him the entire truth – again, like on Sha'ra. He suddenly remembered this strange meeting and the things she had told him.

There must be a reason why she was here the same time his life was about to end.
The first time he had died…there hadn't been anyone asking him if he wanted to die or not…he hadn't had a choice…he was damned to wander a realm between both extremes…and this time suddenly he should have a choice? He could imagine that this may was the normal procedure…but everything inside him told him that in his case it never had been normal…and it never would be. So why was she here?

The prophetess saw the skepticism on his face, and everything she could see were his doubts.
She already had kept silent about too many things when they met on Sha'ra…but she hadn't had a choice. Like she told him…the stakes were too high to risk anything that put more uncertainties into the yet chaotic situation the universe was in. It was about time to tell him more…or she risked destroying her already done advances. “I never lied to you Kai, but I see that you guess the right thing…I also haven't told you everything. I'm not sure if you'll understand, but…before I risk to lose control over the situation…I think it's about time to reveal more!”
Kai blinked, after all…he had been right….
“I cannot look into the cycles of time like my sister, but through peoples fate I see when something is about to go wrong…then, only then I can see a part of it…and the consequences. And this time, something went awfully wrong. Something happened that wasn't destined to happen, and this has to be corrected now, or the consequences will be really horrible.”
She looked a bit contritely at him. Kai shook his head in disbelief. “And what wasn't destined to happen?” he asked, filled with sudden apprehension.
“That you got your life back…it was never part of the cycle of time, and it should never be,” she said as tenderly as she could.
Kai stared at her for a moment, then his gaze dropped to the ground.
Normally he should be shocked…but, surprisingly he wasn't. Some things were suddenly explaining themselves…his sensations hadn't tricked him after all - all those doubts about this new life, there was a reason for it…it was never predetermined that he regained his life!
He slowly nodded. “I…understand, so my fate would have been different?” he asked.
With some careful relief about his calm reaction, the prophetess answered: “Yes, when I first saw this part of the cycle, it showed me a different situation as the one we're currently in. It troubled me deeply when I learned about the real circumstances not long ago…”
“Why did it happen then? I always thought the cycle of time is unchangeable, you told me that it is…” he said reproachful.
“I…cannot talk about that in detail now, Kai, not yet,” she answered hesitating, she had an answer for that, but this wasn't of concern at the moment, and she was sure that Kai may wouldn't understand it. “The more important question is what should happen now,” she continued.
Kai looked a bit strange at her when she again evaded one of his questions…but he didn't mind…maybe she was right not to talk about this now…his head was already full with all those sudden new cognitions. It was hard for him to sort this chaos…
So he kept silent and let her continue…he wanted to know more about this question she had put in…what would happen to him now?
“I knew from the beginning, by seeing Shereens fate, that you would come here. It was destined for you to help the Arcannea in this conflict, you're playing the most important role in it Kai, but then, your sudden re-incarnation put the future of all the humans and the DarkZone into question,” she started to explain. Kai interrupted her shocked: “Why?” he asked. “Why should the future of a universe depend on the death or the life of a single person?”
Something about this sounded a bit…familiar.
“Because in this case it's of enormous importance…and if we don't correct this mistake, the DarkZone is about to meet the same destiny like the LightZone, and of course, this also wasn't predetermined in the cycle of time.”
Kai shook his head. “How? If my re-incarnation is bad for the DarkZone, why am I still alive? Shouldn't I be dead then?” He was confused. As soon as he said this, he knew that this was wrong…of course, he shouldn't be alive, but he also couldn't be dead…dead he couldn't help the Arcannea…and this was the point. This situation was about to happen soon…he looked up into the sky and groaned…why tend things to be so complicated sometimes…and why do they always have to be prophecies…!
“It's not that easy Kai. I told you that you are going to play an important role in this conflict…but dead you are no help, like you already started to comprehend.“ Her jeweled eyes seem to look deep into his mind…well, she was in his mind…, and her look called upon him to use his brain…she wanted him to discover the solution on his own.

Kai turned to his side and watched the dark part of this place…dead he cannot do anything…sure, if he was dead - he was dead. And alive…well, to be alive and vulnerable could mean a sudden and unexpected end before he could do anything…the situation he was in…what was left?
If he still had been in his undead state, like the cycle of time had predicted and wanted…he could have helped the Arcannea…but this fragile life inside him was about to vanish now…and if it did…well, the consequences were those the prophetess had mentioned…the end of the DarkZone…the end of the people there… “This was the reason I wanted to talk to you…on Sha'ra…and why I am here now. It's important that you know how much depends on you…what is at stake…” Kai looked back at her. She was completely serious and there was something like a plea in her gaze. He knew suddenly very well what she wanted from him…a decision – the decision. And this was the hardest thing someone could demand from him…anger rose deep inside him…when would they leave him alone…?

“So again there's no choice for me…!” he said bitterly, very well remembering the first time no one left him the choice between a proper death and this unworthy existence…
The prophetess bit on her lips: “No one will force you to choose a decision you're not willing to make, Kai. I'm not His Divine Shadow who steals other peoples souls and lives. I cannot change your decision once you made it…you have your free will Kai, and no one can take it away any longer. Like I said, I'm only here to let you consider the situation…I know about your inner disruption, it's truly not a fair situation you're in, I already prophesized you that…but the only thing I want is that you consider every option before you're making a decision…!”
Kai tried to clear his mind a bit…it was all a bit too much.
His new life had started really unexpected…and now he learned that it truly shouldn't have started again…not a nice fact to know when you're struggling with all the uncomfortable and mostly painful sensations emanating from this new life with its ability to feel for weeks.
He felt a bit kicked in the ass…and now just because of this new life this whole universe with its entire people was threatened with destruction…as if he hadn't already been the cause for enough destruction and deaths…he was so fed up with it. And now she wanted him in dead earnest to make a decision in this situation?

The prophetess sighed deeply, she felt his partly confusion and his fight with the situation…but she needed to get him to a point…his time was almost up…it was her last chance…
“Kai, you're not the only one who’s between the devil and the deep blue sea…I had my problems by influencing all those recent events in a way so we got this slim chance to step on the right train again…I'm more than sorry that it's you who has to deal with this…but…” she hesitated, searching carefully for words, “…you're the only one who is able to deal with that…there's no one else who can be trusted to do the right things…you've always made the right choices, Kai, despite your own questioning, and you know that!”
Kai looked back into her jewel eyes and suddenly he felt her touching his consciousness. “Stop to think about dying, stop to trouble your mind with the question why the universe had decided to change the rules…you already know what you have to do Kai…listen to your mind and your heart…mainly to your heart…!” she said strictly and vanished as quickly as she had appeared.
Kai was suddenly alone in this world in-between.
A slim chance to step back on the right train a decision a decision
Kai opened his mouth as if to say something, but then he remembered that there was no one he could talk to… The decision she had spoken of on Sha'ra… an unpleasant situation…when he was about to meet his best friend and his worst enemy at the same time…death.
He suddenly started to laugh about this irony. Once he had to die to end a tyranny, and now he should do the same as a living creature? How the heck should he do that? Even if he wanted to continue…should he live on…only to get to this point again and again…never able to die, only because his life was this time too important for this universe? Deep anger rose inside him, he turned again to the dark side:
“What if I decide to end this…if nothing is more important to me than to die…?” he shouted loud into the silent air. What if he simply crossed the line and left everything behind. “What if I am tired to play any more games?” he said a bit calmer to himself.
“Are you?” another voice asked him, a much more familiar voice. Kai turned slowly and looked into his own face – his ego from the first life stood calmly on the dayside.
This place was indeed strange…
“I…don't know,” he answered unsurely. “You haven't hesitated at that time…although you knew that you would die…why are you hesitating now?” Kai pressed his lips together…yes, why?
He would have died…in either way. But his decision to fight against His Shadow had made an important difference in the end. It had sealed His Shadows fate. If he had died on Brunnis like everyone else, he may have died truly, but maybe two universes would have been destroyed then. So he had sealed his own tragic fate…but also His Divine Shadows. Not that he had have any choice in this…but wasn't it the same here?
Kai wanted to die…he wanted to decide to die, but was it the right choice? He calmed himself down a bit, tried to do what the prophetess had suggested…considering and weighting the options. With the gift the prophetess had given him on Sha'ra, he saw again the floating pictures of future events…only that they had changed after the events on the station.
He suddenly saw a universe in chaos and angst…destruction and death…when he thought about dying. Could he really leave Xev and Stan to their fate? Could he really leave Stan in the sways of the Pr'karesh? Leave Xev in complete desperation about his death? Leave the Arcannea to a superior enemy that surely was about to destroy this ancient culture? Like His Shadow once had destroyed his own?
An inner voice whispered a soft NO.
His soul would never find peace if he really left them on their own. There wasn't any excuse in putting billions of lives at the stakes only to see his biggest wish fulfilled.
But how should he go on? He was dying, there in the arms of his beloved Xev…a poison was about to end his life at the very moment…how could the prophetess talk about a slim chance to step on the right train again? What for an existence should he live? There wasn't a way to…
There was.
Kai's train of thoughts stopped suddenly. Xev had mentioned it…she had told him between complete desperation and hope…and he had rejected it. Kai breathed in sharply…the reason why he had rejected it couldn't be more obvious…this life will be given back to him with the protoblood…by injecting an insect substance into his human system…it could surely give him back life and maybe similar skills he once had possessed as the deadly assassin…he won't be defeated that easy anymore…but was he really ready to continue an existence as a living human being with insect DNA? Be it as small as Xev had ensured it…
Kai had his doubts…he was afraid of being lead back to what he once was…
“You won't be like me again!” he heard him say…this time it was the dead Kai, who looked at him with his deadpan face from the night side. Kai looked at his former self and shivered slightly.
No, this existence lay behind him, no one would kill him and revive him as an undead creature…but where's the difference? Both existences were based on the need of protoblood…be it as constant supply or as part of his human DNA…
The BrunnenG inside him rebelled against the thought that something insect-like could be placed inside him…that this kind of enemy could be a part of him forever. But…what choice does he have? According to Xev was it the only cure to stop the poison from killing him.
“What will happen to me if I agree?” he asked worried. “What will I become?”
His former dead self cocked his head: “You're Kai, last of the BrunnenG, you always was, you always will be…it's not a question how a part of your molecular structure looks like…it's what's inside you mind and…heart what matters.” Kai looked with astonishment at his dead ego. Strange to hear those words from him. “You cannot solve the tasks lying in wait as a normal human being…you're not used to that, you've been me for 6000 years, an assassin with superhuman strength, invulnerable, but your living part has completely recovered, and you lost those skills…you've already failed, otherwise you weren't here in this place. The enemy you're fighting can't be defeated without the deadly half you once were.” Kai pressed his lips together, a movement from the side caught his attention, and his living former self appeared beside him on the dayside. “But you also need your emotions, your living human side. They're equally important, because they're what I once was…a person who wanted to explore, who felt the fire of the ancient warriors. Without motivation you're not able to fight, without devotion you're also not able to fight and…. to love.” His living ego looked at him with the same burning fire he once had been filled with 6000 years ago.
Kai's gaze dropped to the ground, looking at the strange line below his feet that separated day and night, life and death, his dead and his living former self…crossing the line in either direction didn't make sense to him anymore.
Dead he would leave those he had learned to love behind, leave something behind his own people had fought for millennia ago…and life was only possible by swallowing the bitter pill…even if there had been another cure…a normal human life would end the same way over and over again…
“I understand…,” Kai nodded slowly. “I have to continue…I have to unite with both parts of my existence – the assassin I once was and equally the living BrunnenG warrior. The undead, invulnerable Kai and the living, feeling Kai.” Kai closed his eyes and tried to settle this for him. The protoblood could give him his assassin skills back, Xev had mentioned some things this Dr Noraan had already found out, and so he was able to protect and rescue again without endanger his own life. He surely could help the Arcannea best that way.
“And you will be alive enough to end your journey someday,” the living Kai said smiling, cutting his train of thoughts. Kai raised one brow: “Really. I hope so, because so far there always intervened something…!” he replied sarcastically. “Everything dies someday,” his dead ego said. Kai looked at him and sighed. He felt strange, truly strange…did he really consider to continue? To live on for the third time in a complete different existence? Kai sighed…he did. He had no choice…he couldn't die or live with the knowledge to leave people on their own, to leave a universe on its own if he was able to prevent the worst. This would be more than unlike him…
Kai raised his gaze and nodded slowly, looked at his former dead and alive self…
”So be it…!”
In front of his eyes the clear line suddenly started to vanish, as well as the both so different forms of his existence…they united…they became one. For a brief moment he saw the black clad figure of the assassin, but without the deadpan face…this one was pretty much alive…!
Kai lowered his head and whispered: “I'm ready…if I can save billions of lives by doing this, I pass my spirit to what has to be done!”
From one second to the next the landscape started to mingle and with a blinding light it vanished…leaving deep darkness as his consciousness returned into his tortured body. But although he felt the welcoming death right next to him, he withdrew from it, only held up with this faint of hope what he was able to do by continuing.

The agony was unbearable and he screamed agonized when he woke again. He heard Xev's voice from a great distance and he felt her body next to his burning and aching one.

Xev barely hadn't any tears to shed. The deep sorrow she felt in her heart let her start to sing in despair. She knew that the still unconscious Kai wouldn't sing or talk to her again soon, and she somehow felt that she had to sing this song for him…the BrunnenG always sang this song when they were expecting their death or when they went into battle. She carefully shifted his fragile body and placed his head against her shoulder. With tears in her beautiful eyes she placed a kiss on his lips. So close to him, she could clearly feel the feverish heat his body radiated.
“Kai…!” she whispered and caressed his cheek. With a trembling voice she began to sing: “Yo way yo, hom var ray – yo ay ra jerume BrunnenG…”
She was nearly at the end of the song when Kai woke so suddenly. Xev stopped when she felt him stirring and crying out.
Despite the pain, Kai heard what she had sung. He fought the agony back. It was moving to hear this ancient song from her lips…and this point in time was more than adequate to sing this song…but not because he expected his death…he had to fight another battle…and this time this battle should end with life…a hard burden for him to carry, but he knew that he had no choice…
He opened his eyes and looked at her. “Xev..!” he whispered, a bit scared when he saw her sad expression and the grief in her eyes. Xev paid full attention and took his hand. “Kai…,” she replied in a teary voice. “Please, don't leave me alone…I don't want to lose you…” she added begging and desperately. “Everything dies someday, darunee,” he said calmly, “…but not today.”
Xev just wanted to shake her head fiercely, but in surprise she stopped…what did he say?
“We don't have any time to waste, darunee, I agree, let Noraan take a try…!” Xev breathed in and watched his keen expression carefully. Did he make a joke? No, not in that situation, he really meant it…”Really?” she asked despite. The BrunnenG nodded: “Hurry, I don't have much…time left,” his voice broke again and Xev could see his desperate but unsuccessful fight against those pain. Xev gulped and reacted at once. She laid him down onto the bed and rolled-up in her clusterlizard-shape…the fastest way she could think of to reach Noraans workroom.
The physician winced startled when she erupted. “Yes!” she shouted breathless. Noraan looked at her for two seconds, then he understood and put his datapad down. He called for his team and both hurried back to Kai. Experienced and faster than the light Noraan and his team took care of everything. Xev stood next to Kais bed when they prepared everything. “We're going to put him into an artificial coma and his body into stasis, they're preparing this first step now,” Noraan explained when she asked what the people were doing. Xev nodded, only calmed little because of all those devices around them now. She looked back at Kai. The BrunnenG was barely conscious. “Kai?” She took his hand. “It's time…” He labored back into consciousness for a last time. “Sait va ta ray, Xev – do na ta va,” he said low. “I love you Kai,” she replied and kissed him. Kai whispered something in BrunnenG she wasn't able to understand, then his head rolled to one side and he lost his consciousness. A nurse took her arm and dragged her aside. Two men of Noraans team pushed some buttons and a thin blue layer appeared, it covered the whole bed and Kais body only seconds later and then they started to shove the bed out of the room. Noraan nodded at her and left the room as last of his team. “Can't I stay with him?” Xev asked. The nurse shook her head: “No, not inside the operating room. But there's an observation room next to it. If you like I can take you there!” Xev nodded grateful and followed her. Do na ta va. She sighed and was sorry that she couldn't speak his language…but there was at least a bit hope now that she could ask him what those words meant soon.



Copyright © Aenea Endymion